Fourth of July

CHAPTER THIRTY-TWO

HER POV

God knows how much I've tried to sleep peacefully last night but no matter how hard I tried, I just can't shut my eyes off and puts myself to sleep.

I can't forget about what Gabriel just said. Kahit pilit kong alisin 'yong mga 'yon sa isip ko, hindi ko magawa. Parang may parte sa'kin na tinamaan dahil du'n. Hindi pa rin ako maka-get-over.

What if he knows? Ano nang gagawin ko? Will he sue me for this? For coming into his life and ruin it? For invading his personal life?

How come did he knew? I mean, I was pretty sure that I haven't told him anything or doing anything that would give him hints about this. I'm working my ass off carefully.

Para na 'kong masisiraan ng ulo sa nangyayari. Tapos sinabi niya pang kahit ano man ang malaman niya, maniniwala pa rin siya sa'kin? Para ano? Para 'wag lang ako mawala?

Why would he say that?

Why does his actions and words suddenly becoming so soft and tender?

Kung noon, ni halos ayaw niya 'kong kausapin. Nag-mi-mistulang misteryo ang pagkatao niya sa'kin. Pero ngayon.. unti-unting nag-iiba lahat ng 'yon.

I wonder why. And I keep on wondering why. Ilang beses ko man itanong sa isipan ko, wala akong makuhang sagot.

Make him fall for you and break his heart after.

Dahil ba 'to doon? Nahuhulog na nga ba siya sa'kin gaya ng nakatakdang mangyari sa plano? O baka naman, kumikilos na rin siya sa sarili niya. Baka mamaya, mabaliktad ang lahat.

Impit akong napatili at napasabunot na lang sa buhok ko. Ano'ng oras na rin pero hindi pa 'ko lumalabas ng kwarto. Para akong tangang naka-tulala lang sa kawalan. Daig ko pa zombie, kahit idlip lang hindi ko magawa.

Napatingin ako sa tabi ko. Gabriel's not here. Nang makarating ako rito sa kwarto, ni-lock ko agad 'yon. Ayoko siyang makita o makausap man lang. Mabuti na rin at hindi niya 'ko kinulit. Now, I don't know where he is or where did he slept last night.

My phone suddenly vibrated. Cedrick's calling me.

Agad kong sinagot 'yon at ni-loud speaker.

"Hm?"

"Wala ka pang sinesend sa'kin na kahit ano ever since I took your recorder." Panimula niya kaagad. "What's going on, Gavin? Is everything all right?"

"Aayusin ko pa 'yung clips bago ko i-send sa'yo. Everything's good, Ced. Everything's falling into their places where they should be in."

"That's great." He paused for a second then speak again. "How about the new mission?"

"O-okay naman.."

"Don't get too attached, Gavin. Hindi pwedeng ikaw ang matalo rito. Anyway, I'll be expecting your report until 10 pm." 'Yun na lang ang sinabi niya at pinatayan na 'ko ng tawag.

Muli akong bumuga ng hangin. Don't get too attached? That's easy. That.. should be. Tama siya, hindi pwedeng ako ang matalo rito. I need to get rid of this.. of him. Para makuha ko na 'yung nararapat na buhay para sa'kin.

Para hindi ako nahihirapan nang ganito.

***
Lunch time na nang maka-labas ako ng kwarto. Nakita ko sa may restau sina Gabriel kasama ang magulang niya. May mga pagkain na sa harapan nila pero hindi pa rin nagagalaw ang mga 'yon.

"She's here. Let's dive in now. We still have meetings to attend to." Sabi ni Tito Gabriel nang makarating ako sa table nila. Nag-mano ako sa kaniya at bumeso naman ako kay Tita Vic.