IMP's Chick Magnet (Helluva Boss Waifus x Male Reader)

Ambush

Credit to Renowned Wolf for helping me with this chapter.

Scene opens on you with Verosika's group, IMP, and Octavia in the basement of your shared building. 

Vortex: Wait, so you're saying that Cerberus...is your Dad?

Y/N: Yeah, I just found out yesterday. 

Moxxie: And your mom was always Human?

Y/N: Yeah, I guess I was half-demon the whole time. 

Kiki: How did they even meet?

Y/N: Dad was chasing a serial killer or whatever that escaped from Hell, the killer toke my mom hostage, dad banished him back to Hell, and one thing led to another.

Harem: That's kinda hot...

Blitzo: Are you ever going to able to do the whole, ya know, giant Dog beast thing?

Y/N: I don't know. My Dad thinks that because I was born half-human, I might never be able to do that.

Kat: Well, at least you've still got super-powers.

Y/N: Damn straight!

You summon a fireball and blast a large target across the room.

Scene transitions to several hours later. IMP are in their meeting room with you sitting in between Millie and Loona. 

Blitzo: Alright gang, who wants to go to a wedding?

Loona: Ew, why?

Blitzo: Because we've been hired to assassinate the bride, turns out she's just a gold digger that's conned her previous five husbands before killing them.

Moxxie: Just goes to show that some people don't respect the sacredness of marriage.

Loona: Gagging noises

Everyone else: ...

Loona: Sorry. Had something in my throat.

Y/N: Babe, are you feeling okay?

Loona: It's nothing.

Cut to the church, where Moxxie, Millie, and Blitzo are hiding in the rafters while you and Loona are standing outside in your human disguises. You are wearing a suit and tie while Loona is wearing a dress with a plunging neckline.

Loona: Tch, Marriage is a load of bullshit, it's all destined for failure.

Y/N: You really think that, Loona?

Loona: Shit yeah. All the fucked up things I've seen on this job. You probably saw worse back when you were alive. And don't get me started on Stolas.

Y/N: You do have a point, they do tend to end in disaster. Especially nowadays.

Loona: No offense babe, but if you're speaking in favor of marriages, you really suck at it.

Y/N: However. I think most of them fail because they don't bother to really know each other they don't bother to actually fall in love and dedicate themselves to each other. I mean look at my parents, my mother is human and my father is literally Cerberus and their marriage couldn't be happier.

Loona: Okay, you have a point. 

You take one of her hands and stare into her eyes with a loving expression.

Y/N: If they all love each other a third as much as we love each other, then there wouldn't be as many failed marriages.

Loona: Blushes