Meta Knight Adopts You

Clarification

TW: talks of self harm and overwhelming amounts of work

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"Don't say you don't matter!" That's what bothered him? Not that I was still talking, not that i didn't look at him, just that I said my death wouldn't matter?

"Why?" It's a genuine question. I don't get an answer, he watches me as his eyes change colors again. First red, then orange, then white, then green, and right back to red. I don't know what I'm doing to cause so much change, all I know is red means angry.

"Why would you think you don't matter?" He's straining his voice, trying not to yell, but the malice behind his words is clear. I just don't know where it's directed. It's not at Sword and Blade, and it's not to himself... so me? I did something wrong? I must have... right? I shrug in response, before sitting back up, I stay seated.

"Why would I matter?" I watch him, his eyes go white, and then red again. That's when I see I really fucked up. If I can't get his eyes to go back to normal after three tries, it's staying like that until Sword and Blade fix it. So I fucked up bad. I've never given him anything negative that sticks, just... confusion or amusement. Anger is a first, both in its appearance and it's stay. Not three seconds have passed and it feels  like we've been stuck here forever.

His eyes, the only way he conveys emotion. According to Sword and Blade, no one makes his eyes shift to so many colors this often. According to Sword and Blade, before I came around, Meta Knight only used yellow, green, and blue when no one was looking. I've been jerking him around like a puppet and unknowingly, waking a sleeping bear. I didn't know he didn't convey much before, I didn't know he was reserved, and didn't attach to new people. I didn't know it hurt him when I hurt. Only a few moments, a few moments that seem like hours.

Try damage control, please? "I'm sorry." I watch him, and his eyes go gray.

"No, no, lo siento, no estoy molesto contigo, es la gente que te hizo pensar que era tu culpa." (No, no, I'm sorry, I'm not upset with you, it's the people who made you think it was your fault.) Now it's my turn to be confused, why is he angry with other people? And the, 'ones who made me this way'. What way? Part monster with the spikes and all? Or just my personality? Is he tired of dealing with me? His eyes are still gray. At least they aren't red.

"Sorry..." He continues to stare at me, I hear Sword and Blade leave the room, their boots clicking behind them. I don't look over. I'm angry their leaving me alone, but I understand it's probably awkward. His eyes stay gray, and I wait for him to leave. But he doesn't, so I keep waiting. He speaks, and startled me.

"Why do you feel like it's your fault?" I shrug at him.

"I just feel like I'm doing everything wrong, all the time."

"Why?" He presses, he wants something more in depth.

"I don't know why. I just- anytime something bad happens, I just... I blame myself, even if I I know I wasn't the cause. I feel like I could've done something to stop it." His eyes are still gray, why can't I stop talking? Why can't I ask him to leave? "I don't know why your paying so much attention to my past, it's not happening now. And Kirby has it way worse! He fights monsters practically weekly and the citizens still act like he's the problem!" He flinches back. Was it my voice? Or what I said?

"Y/N, I understand that you may believe that others have it worse, but that's not an excuse to ignore your own suffering. I'd done the same thing back with the Star Warriors. But as time went on, I realized I couldn't help anyone if I couldn't help myself first." His eyes are still gray, I want to help him, I want to help the people on this world avoid the rout my world took, but Meta Knight's words echo in my head. How can I help them if I can barely keep myself together?

"Can I vent to you? Do you know what venting is? I'd do it with my friends a lot, but I never really got super deep into anything." He nods, I don't know if he knows what vent means, but he's saying yes, and no one else is around.

"My family went through a lot, a group got cancer, my mom included, as you know, my dad was shot at the same time. I spent most of my time at my grandfathers, he had such a small home, it hosted so many people. It seemed so big them though." I pause and sigh. "One day I came home and I had straight A's on my report card, first grade, right in the middle of the mess. I've never seen mom smile more genuinely. So I worked harder, and harder to keep up with what she wanted." He sits across from me. I take another breathe.

"One day I came home with worse grades, start of middle school, still full of anxiety, before I started my meds. I had an F, just one, and she told me to work harder. I cried and I cried all night. 'But I am working hard! I am! Somebody please! Somebody be nice to me! I've worked so hard! I'm doing the best I can! Can't it just be alright? Can't you forgive me?' It was awful, that's about when I started burning myself. Keep myself awake. 'Finish your work, one more problem, you can sleep at lunch.' I never did, just more work. Get home, cook, help my brothers with their homework, dad was home some weeks gone others, same with mom. So I had to be working to learn grades ahead of me for Gavin, and keep my memory of previous stuff for John." Another breath.

"I'd sit down, listen to Jasmine vent when she got home from work. I wanted to stop, take some time to myself, but then she told me that I was the only one who made her feel her. I couldn't take that away from her." I watch him to gauge his reaction, but his eyes don't change, and his mask blocks his face.

"I really don't want to push this on you, I can stop if you want." He shakes his head.

"Keep going, I feel like you haven't been able to talk to anyone. It's not good to keep it to yourself."

"Okay, just, tell me if you want me to stop." He nods. "The only reason I stopped burning myself was because my friends were hurting themselves. Kinda hypocritical to hurt yourself and tell your friends not to. So it became, help my bothers with their work, listen and advise my sister when she vents to me, try to stop hurting myself, bring food to my friends. I uh... used to bake for them, their parents wouldn't usually give them positive attention, so I tried to fill that for them. And I would also keep them from hurting themselves at school."

"Did you ever get a moment to yourself?"

"Not really, I shared my room with my sister, school obviously never leaves you alone, always in classes and surrounded by people. After school I'd get home, help my brothers and go to bed." I rub at my eyes. "Oh! Wait! I did! Whenever I baked everyone would leave me alone so they could have some after! I did get some time to myself!" The linger the recipe, the more time alone.

"Is that why you enjoy baking so much?" I pause and think a moment.

"Probably, I never really thought about why, I just knew it made me less stressed. Huh." The thought sinks in. "Man, I really never thought about that... I guess, I guess I just looked for any time alone I could get. That's like, the only time I could really have a clear mind. Huh." I feel Meta Knight's hand on my right shoulder. I look up to him, his eyes are back to their regular yellow, thank fuck.

"You should rest."

"I can't really do much else." I look out a window, the snow is still dumping down. Piling on the window sill. "Looks like a Christmas movie, or maybe a horror? Those are two opposite types of films." I hear him chuckle a little. He sits next to me.

"I'll keep watch, make sure no one disturbs you."

"Honestly, I've had so much time to myself since I got here, I don't know what to do." I close my eyes and lay back. "But a nap wouldn't hurt." I get comfortable, and listen to the snow fall outside. Before I drift off, it's the quickest I've passed out in I don't know how long.