Unsuccessful

Lets drink together our...Pain...

Hardin's point of view...

I sit at a local bar for the past two hours. I don't even recall the name I saw when I walked in. I am sure, I am drunk. I already ordered my sixth drink for the day and somehow the bartender is late to serve me. She was flirting with me a while ago, undressing me with her eyes. I am sure she already pictured me taking her from behind inside the mini washroom area they have built.

Well, I am not interested. I am already taken. But, sometimes some girls just don't take the hint. I have to shove my engagement finger on the girl's face to fuck her off. Maybe she took the hint and that's why she is busy flirting with another guy on the other side of the counter. God, she is so desperate for sex. It amuses me honestly.

Before Tessa, I was the fuckboy of Washington. I had created that image over the years by my actions.
But when I try my best to understand my current situation, it reminds me of my time in London. I used to visit random bars with my friends on Friday night and we used to walk away with random British sluts wrapped around our arms. That was my life in London until Amira happened. After Amira, I changed my ways. I still used to sleep around but I started doing it smartly. Before I used to fuck any girl, I used to inform her from the beginning that it's just sex, there can be no expectations about us having any kind of relationship. With Coley, it was more like friends with benefits kind of way. If I would have known that Coley has fallen for me over the years of our sexual relationship, then I would have put an end to that long before crushing her out of my life.

With Tess, everything changed. I fell for her. I loved her and I still do. I never meant to hurt her the way I did with my words. But, I had to.

Finally, my sixth drink arrives. The girl tries to repeat her previous flirtations. I chunk my drink down my throat and hand it to the girl.

"Another round..please," Fuck me, Tessa has completely rubbed herself on me. I am using words like 'Please' for a slut like her. She smiles and seductively traces my extended hand with her fingers.

I laugh drunkenly. "Why, that guy over there also shrugged you off?" The bartender snatches the glass from my hand and goes away. I continue to laugh. It feels nice to act rude to others, something I stopped after Tessa.

I feel the chair kept adjacent to mine move. The guy orders soda water. I laugh. Soda water, who orders soda water at a bar.

"Wow..man. Yesterday you were at a pub, today you are at a bar. Yesterday you were drunk off your ass, today you are drunk again. That's a record, congratulations."

Great, fucking great. It's my best friend, Anthony. I wonder if Tessa send him here to look out for me or if he came all by himself. I want to believe the before but somehow I know it's the latter. Tessa has not messaged me or called me after our fight. I did call her twice and her number was busy at first and then her cell phone was switched off. She is mad and I cannot even blame her.

"What's the occasion this time," Anthony asks me. Both of our drinks arrive simultaneously. Well, that was fast. I chunk my sixth glass of rum like a pro.

"I still won't fuck you, I am married,"
I scream and laugh, both at the same time. Any third person in the bar can easily figure out that I am drunk. I look at Anthony. He is drinking his soda water. I move my hands on his back and pat him forcefully.

"Good boy, aren't you," I laugh as Anthony rolls his eyes at my comment.

"Bro, what happened, please tell me," I don't respond. I want to ask him if Tessa asked him to come here for me. I want to know if she still cares but I am scared to find the exact opposite.

"Did..did Tessa ask you to come to look for me," Anthony doesn't reply instantly. He takes his time, kind of confirming my biggest fear, Tessa doesn't care.