Spring Forward, Fall Back (Alucard x Chubby! Reader)

Chapter 127 - Clean Up, Aisle You

Alucard P.O.V.

I was pissed. Not only was I forced to go to a place I knew I didn't want to be in, but this shit happened. All I wanted to do was go home at this point. Anything I could do to try to erase this from my mind I would have gladly done, not to mention I'd actually thought of going through the Mirror to right before they dragged me here just to punch each and every one of them that thought this was a great idea. It wouldn't have taken long. I might even have turned into a wolf just to take a chunk out of Leo's ass for this shit.

"I want to go home," I said angrily. "I want to forget this night ever happened and just sit with Y/N for the rest of the night."

"You can't!" Ryan shouted. His sudden volume level made Gregory jump and nearly swerve off the road.

"Why not?" I asked. I was afraid he may say something sensible, so I braced myself.

"You're covered with excrement and urine, you're pissed off and you haven't thought of what it would be like to walk into your home with Y/N. She'd lose her shit and try to murder us all."

"I'm kinda fine with that at this moment," I said honestly.

"Hey," Gregory fired back, "we weren't the ones who hired her for this shit. You can aim all that at Leo. And, just for your information, Richter is back there beating the shit out of him as we speak."

"There's no way I would have wished that on my worst enemy," Allen said with a grimace. "That boy needs to have his bollocks tied in a knot."

"I'll hold him down," Father said from the seat ahead of me. "I think we should wait on that, though. Let Y/N find out about it, first."

"If he still has his baby making equipment when she gets done with him, she's half asleep when you told her," Allen remarked on a chuckle.

"That's all well and good, but I'm still going to wish for him to stand behind an elephant with diarrhea after this stunt," I said. My skin was crawling with how filthy I felt and all I really wanted was a shower, a beer and maybe cake.

"Don't worry," Gregory said as he began to take a left turn. "I'll get you to my place and get you cleaned up. Then we'll do our best to ignore Leo for the rest of the night. You can stay at my place for the night since Y/N wasn't really expecting you to come home tonight."

"Just give her a head's up and let her know plans changed," Ryan offered as he pointed out a convenience store up on the right.

"Oh no!" I shouted as I reached into my pocket and realized that the urine had gotten into my phone and completely fried it. "My phone's dead."

"Well give it here and I'll charge it," Father said.

"Not that kind of dead," I said with disappointment in my voice. "It was under the stripper when she lost her shit. Literally."

"Minor detour, then," Gregory said as he pulled off a perfect 180 and headed across the street to a Walmart. "We'll stop in here really fast, pick you up some clothes to change into and get you a new phone."

"And a bag of rice, two 24 packs of beer, some chips and a second poker set," Ryan rattled off with a smile. When Gregory looked at him like he'd lost his mind, Ryan just laughed.

"Come on," he chuckled out. "You know we'll need something to do and our poker set isn't enough for all of us to play a decent game." Conceding the point, Gregory grabbed his wallet from the center console and asked if we'd all like to go in.

"I don't think I will," I said. "No offense meant, but I smell like a port-a-potty right now, and while Walmart is where you go to find some weird ass shit just waddling up the aisles this time of night, I'd rather not find my photo on the People of Walmart website."