Griffin

Chapter 51: Revisit

I couldn't make myself open the envelope.

I lay in bed and stare out the hospital window.

It's been two days since Logan gave it to me.

He never asked me if I opened it.

I haven't told anyone else about its existence.

I think a part of me is afraid they would convince me to open it. And I want to open it on my own terms.

Another part of me is afraid to read what he had written.

I'm afraid if I open it, some parts of me are accepting that he won't ever be back to speak those words to me in person.

And I'm not ready for it.

A single tear slides down onto my pillow, I wipe it off my face quickly.

I thought I had done all my crying, but here we are.

                 The Past

Griffin stood at the entrance's way watching her in his room.

She fits right in. He couldn't help himself and glanced at his bed seeing images of her in it. 

She walked around dusting his shelves when she stopped suddenly. Something caught her attention.

Photo of his family.

She leaned in closer inspecting it; she stood on tiptoes because his shelf had been personally made for his height.

She burrowed her brows; he could tell her eyes are taking in the detail of his family photo.

"I see, you're very busy up here" she jumped slightly at the sound of his voice

She turned to him with wide eyes.

Griffin pushed his body off the door's frame making his way into his room.

Her eyes followed his every movement, she was cautious of him.

Smart girl.

" I'm sorry, I didn't mean to snoop, I was just dusting" to prove her point she lift the feather.

She's adorable.

Amused, he decides to mess with her more " I don't mind, we might as well try to get used to being in each other's space"

Her expression said she rather not.

Griffin turned his face to hide his amusement, he decided she would not find this amusing. Instead, he pretended to place his watch on his desk.

She cleared her throat.

He paused.

God, why does the sound she makes at the back of her throat turns him on so much.

Shit.

He looked up at his ceiling for strength.

"Um yeah. I'm really sorry about this morning, I can do your laundry for you if you can just give them to me"

His eyes slide back down to her then, her expression is one who wants to run for the exit, she grips her feather duster tightly.

She's very nervous.

But not soon after, she gathered her wits around her and stand her ground facing him heads on. 

Those eyes, they looked at him with such defying fire.

"It's not a problem, I already had it taken care of."

She had no idea what it did to him when she looked up at him with those eyes.

The red of her tongue peeked out and licked her lips nervously.

Fuck meeeee.

He groaned internally.

"Do you usually get personal with people like that? " He didn't give a fuck at this point

" Excuse me?" She asks him confused

Griffin pushes himself off his desk and steps closer "You snooped at my photo and had your hands all over me this morning in front of everyone at school. So, my question is, do you usually get this personal with people?" His mood gets darker thinking there could have been someone else holding her "Or just me." Remembering the feel of her skin against his, how soft she felt sent his body out of sorts.

Before he knows it, his feet move on their own closer to her like a magnetic pull. Maybe he just wants to feel her close to him or maybe he was just that stupid to push their boundary. 

"Hmm, I think you're misunderstanding something here." She spoke

"Am I? Do explain" He asks, taking notes on the curve of her nose, she has one tiny freckle under her left eye, and he wants to rub his thumb over it to see how smooth they feel. 

"It was an accident when I bumped into you. I would never do such things to you intentionally. As for your shirt, I did offer to clean it for you. But you declined, remembered?"

He didn't care about the damn shirt; she can drench him in more sauce if it means he gets to hold her like that again. 

The burn of her touch stayed with him all day during class, he couldn't concentrate all day because of her.

"And as I said, it's not a problem I already had it taken care of." He responded 

"So, what's the problem?" She asks 

"The problem is you need to be more mindful and be less handsy with people. You could have bumped into someone else that wasn't me that day."

He wanted to tell her that he was jealous and didn't want her to touch anyone else but him. But she wasn't ready to hear it. 

Her face drops suddenly, sad almost. Then like wildfire, the heat began to creep up her neck and travel to her face, she looks down and mumble "sorry"

Her voice sounds so small laced with embarrassment, he cursed at himself for making her feel this way. 

Griffin runs his hand over his face in frustration with himself "That's not-" but she cuts him off "I'm almost done with your room; I won't bother you for long. Please carry on with your business." She said before turning away quickly. Leaving him staring at her back wordlessly. 

Congratulation, you just made her feel worse.  

Maybe this whole thing is bound to fail miserably, how can a girl like her love a guy like you? 

"I'm going to take a shower." He said instead 

She didn't respond.

This is going to get worse before it can get better. He can feel it in his bone.