MY FATE

Chapter 7- I killed Her

"One more glass, please!", A very drunk Hiroki said to bartender.
The bartender gave him a small smile and said," This is from that woman sitting in the corner."

Hiroki looked where the bartender was pointing and saw a very sexy looking, middle aged, blonde woman. She was definitely a foreigner. Hiroki raised his glass to express his gratitude towards her and got a slight nod as a response.
He continued to drink it in one shot but was blocked by a blank looking Kirihitho. Hiroki looked at him and smiled sheepishly," This is my last one. I swear."

"I don't believe in you. The last one you said was also your last one. And the one before that and another one before that."

Hiroki scratched the back of his head and laughed," Did I?........ Maybe. But! I swear to god, this is my last one! It*hic*doesn't look good to throw away a gift, right?"

Kirihitho sighed to himself and let Hiroki have his last drink of that day. Kirihitho had no idea that Hiroki used to drink. If he did, then would have made Hiroki his drinking buddy because Hiroki's alcohol tolerance was much higher than Tatsuya who used to get drunk just in two shots of vodka.

Hiroki got up on his wobbly legs, rummaged through his pockets and slammed his credit card on the counter. He slurred out," Mr.Bartender, give me the cheapest wine you have!! The entire bottle!"

Kirihitho looked at him in disbelief and immediately intervened," NO! You already had enough! This much alcohol isn't good for your stomach."

Hiroki gave him a blank stare and asked," Why do you care?"

"…"

He laughed to himself and said," Please, don't be so gentle with someone like me. It isn't worth it."

"What?", Kirihitho asked.

Hiroki snickered," I killed someone, Mr.Nakamura. On this very day." His eyes saddened drastically and whispered out," She is dead.……because of me."

The bartender handed him the wine bottle and got back to his work.

Hiroki went back to his laughing state and saluted the bartender. He started walking out of the bar leaving a stunned Kirihitho behind.
'Why would Hiroki call himself something like that? Didn't his grandmother died in an accident?', was Kirihitho's thought.

Hiroki came out of the bar, walked few steps and bumped into a light pole. He held on the light pole tightly and leaned his head on it.

Someone asked him," Are you okay, mister?"

He shook his head and whispered," No. I am not."
Soon a single tear strolled from his cheek to the ground. And slowly, many more followed. He slid down the pole and clutched it very tightly, with the wine bottle still hanging on his other hand.

Kirihitho came out of the bar only to find a slumped down Hiroki, who was a crying mess along with a stranger who was asking him if he was okay. Kirihitho strode to Hiroki and gave the stranger a look which said, F**k off.

The stranger got the message and left in hurry.

He looked at Hiroki, and his eyes softened.
He knew very well, it was not easy to forget a person who was so close to you. Even if it had been twelve years since Hannah's death, it was not easy for Hiroki to get over it. Like, she was right there besides him for so long and one day she suddenly disappeared. He lost his bestfriend, his Gramps, his entire world so suddenly. He wasn't even given some time to register what happened. How could he just let go of someone who was so important to him?
Two years, five years, twelve years, twenty years or maybe even his entire life wasn't enough to get over her death. She was an angel who protected Hiroki from every bad person or thing. Even she had committed some mistakes, but she always accepted them and tried to do her best to never committ the same mistake again. Yes, she had also hurted Hiroki, but she always did her best to ask for his forgiveness. She had her flaws and those flaws were the only things that didn't make her Hiroki's god but an angel.

Hiroki, who was still crouched down on the ground, remembered her last words to him. 'I love you, Hiro. More than anyone and anything. Always remember it.'
If only, he had known that those were the last words Hannah was going to say to him, he would have told her that he loves her too. If only, he had a chance to go back in time, he wanted to hug his Gramps just one last time and tell her how much she meant to him, how much he loves her, how much he cares for her and how much he misses her. Aaa....., if only he was able to turn back time, he would have done so many things differently.

Kirihitho sighed to himself and crouched down on Hiroki's level. He patted Hiroki's back lightly to calm him down. Whatever words he was going to say, they will not do much effect on Hiroki. So, he just became a quiet human pole on which Hiroki could lean on.

After a while, Hiroki's sobbing turned to sniffling, which indicated he finally started to calm down. Kirihitho handed him a handkerchief which Hiroki was silently grateful about. Kirihitho then proceeded to pick him up and take Hiroki to his car.After settling a sniffling Hiroki down, he looked for water bottle in his car and handed it to Hiroki.

Hiroki stared at the bottle blankly and then quietly took it.

"You okay?", Kirihitho finally managed to ask.

Hiroki nodded his head lightly.

"You want to talk about it?"

"…"

Kirihitho sighed," It's okay. You don't have to force yourself to say or do anything. I am not your parents."

Hiroki chuckled lightly on Kirihitho's comment.

Kirihitho ruffled Hiroki's hair and said," Look at you. Your eyes are swollen, your cheeks are red, your eyes are dazed. Do you have any idea how vulnerable you look right now?………Don't ever drink infront of anyone." He held his hand infront of Hiroki and demanded," Promise me."

Hiroki unconsciously moved his hand forward and gave it Kirihitho.

Kirihitho smiled in satisfaction and sat in the driver's seat.

"Where's is Mikarin?", Hiroki whispered.

"She went back."

"Oh."

The car fell silent again. The drive to Kamazura Mansion was quiet. Not a peaceful type of quiet but a suffocating type of quiet. Hiroki leaned his head on the window and felt the car's vibration to calm his nerves down. He had hundreds of thoughts going through his head. What would his family say if they say saw him drunk like this? What would be their reaction to see him at that mansion on that particular day after so long? Will they be angry? Will they hate him more? Will they despise him? Why was Kirihitho so quiet? Why wasn't he leaving him alone to fend for himself? Why was he caring for him so much?...........and many many more.

The anxiety of getting answer to this question was taking a toll on him, which was sobering him up. He couldn't take it anymore and opened the wine bottle. He drank almost half of it so that it will keep him drunk.

Kirihitho glanced at him but didn't comment anything.

They finally reached the mansion after sometime but neither Kirihitho nor Hiroki was ready to leave.
One because he didn't want to face his family and another because he wanted to assure the one.

Kirihitho," You sure you are going to be okay? Or should I take you inside?"

Hiroki asked in confusion," You are not coming in?"

Kirihitho rolled his eyes and replied," I don't want to meet that mother of yours."

Hiroki nodded his head in realisation and went quiet again.

Kirihitho looked at Hiroki and said softly," I just want you to know that, your grandmother's death wasn't your fault."

Hiroki laughed," How do you know that? Were you there?"

"No, I wasn't. But I know one thing for sure. You didn't kill her.", Kirihitho said honestly.

Hiroki's eyes welled up with tears," You don't know anything, Mr.Nakamura. If only........if only I would have kept my mouth shut, Gramps wouldn't have gotten distracted and she would not have died like in that car!!! I f**king killed her!!! Me, and my big mouth!!!!!"