Hogwarts, Scotland Highlands, 1978
January 28th, depressing coldFour days. For four days I didn't go to classes.
Lily came to check up on me but I locked my dorm door. Marlene and Dorcas were the only ones who'd come in and they'd thankfully respected my privacy and let me be except for the usual pleading for me to eat something.
The last time I ate, I nearly puked. My appetite was gone and my eyes were dry.
I didn't even cry. Not once.
I'd promised myself not to cry long ago, especially not over pathetic emotions but feeling this numb makes me think of myself as an insensitive bitch.
I mean who gets cheated on and then doesn't even shed a tear? I was being a miserable brat and needed to shower so badly.
Remus came to check on me, too. He still thinks I have no idea what happened because I'd been distant since the first day back. He thinks the excuse I put out there on January 24th, 'I'm just tired' is the only reason I've confined myself in the dorm.
I think I would've felt a little fine if only he'd accepted he'd done something. If he'd been honest, I would've considered hearing him out.
But he hadn't been. He hadn't said a word.
When lunch rolled around, someone knocked on my door. I rolled in my bed and shut my eyes.
I don't remember the last time I spoke, do I still have my voice?
I don't know why I feel this way. Remus and I hadn't even dated for that long. I didn't love him, right? Why would I be so heartbroken if he kissed some other girl?
There were obviously people out there with much bigger issues and I was such a twat, crying because oh, my boyfriend cheated on me. Poor, Elena.
Groaning, I spoke a mental 'shut up' to myself in my mind. I had every right to be sad and mad. No matter if people had bigger issues, this was big for me.
The knocks stopped coming and just when I thought the person had respectfully fucked off, the door lock broke down and the wards I'd put up in the room dissolved like ash.
"WHAT THE FUCK?" I shrieked when Sirius sauntered in like he owned the place.
"Hullo, Hawke." He grinned, his long dimple looking gorgeous in the dim illumination.
"What do you think you are doing, Black?" I narrowed my eyes at him and he narrowed his right back.
"When did you last bathe?"
"Rude," I huffed, slipping farther under the sheets and shutting my eyes.
When I thought I had peace, it turned out to be a false alarm. Sirius yanked the comforter back and I yelped when the chipping cold suddenly pierced my body.
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Eunoia | Sirius Black
FanfictionThe House of Hawke has been called the traitorous, filthy and scum house the entire time that name was known to the living. Past or future, one would accompany it with the adjective "Horrifying". It was a matter of grief for the youngest daughter...