Eunoia | Sirius Black

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October 15th, 1981

"Attie,"

"Oh, fuck off"

Sirius's laugh boomed so joyfully, it made my heart clench. "Nova."

"Veto. Poppy."

"Veto. Aria."

"Veto. Lilah."

"Veto. Lia."

"A stronger name," Sirius whispered. "For our little fighter here."

"Fighter?" I asked with a small smile. 

"I know she is one, I can sense it."

I snorted, "Uh-huh."

"I can!" He argued, "Plus, she's got both of our blood. She's definitely a fighter."

"Lyra," he says suddenly and I feel my heart soar.

I look at him with a twinkle in my eye and repeat, "Lyra."

"As strong a woman as her mother." Sirius whispers.

"I can't believe I'm going to be a mother," I say to him and his eyes beam, he understands. 

"I'll never let anyone hurt her." He says and I know he's being truthful, can see it on his face, hear it in his voice that he'd go to unfathomable lengths to ensure the safety of our girl. 

"You have to drink more water, and don't forget the amount of fruits - "

"I've heard the lecture from Lily already." I rolled my eyes. 

Sirius had screamed James' name through the two-way mirror a few days ago after my second apothecary appointment where he'd gone with me and had gotten to see the small baby in my stomach. A baby that was ours, his and mine. 

My baby. I was going to be a mother. My eyes prickled with tears and I desperately wished for mum's arms to cradle me. I would not become her. 

Lily had started crying and James nearly had, too. Had said he knew it was coming and Sirius would've definitely smacked him had he been there, luckily Lily had done it for him. Then she'd proceeded to lecture me about the food, the exercise, the measures and precautions before snatching the mirror from James and showing me a very happy Harry playing with his toy broom that Sirius had gifted him in July. 

It had only made me all the more excited to be a mother. I couldn't wait to dress my girl up, make her hair in stylish braids, couldn't wait to be the one my baby would look up to one day. Couldn't wait for Sirius to be someone she'd think of as a role model. So many things, so many memories I wanted to make. Only 4 months.

"I want you to be okay, want you to be healthy and safe." He twirled a lock of my hair in his hand. "You're getting all the rest you should have the past months."

My heart swelled with affection. He'd taken such great care of me the past fortnight, I wanted to bawl my eyes out. 

My belly bump had become more and more visible now that I knew what I was looking at. I dressed up in one of Sirius' old sweaters which smelled of his sweet musky scent. I inhaled deeply, covered in a strong territorial and possessive feeling over the father of my child, my husband, the love of my life. 

He'd agreed to this trip to the Ministry after a lot of struggle but I wanted to go badly. I agreed with him saying I needed to rest after the walk around the time I'd done most of the day but I also wanted updates or I'd go crazy. 

Sirius waited for me outside the house, the epitome of cool and composed in his Auror robes that hung tightly around his torso, giving a hint of those ripped muscles. His hair was half up-half down today, a stray strand on his left brow, a smirk on his soft lips and utter devotion in his light storm-grey eyes.

"You look so mine in my clothes, I have to restrain my hands at my side lest you want us to be late for work." His raspy voice declared. 

My body heated up at the sensual promise in his eyes but I shook my head with mirth, "Let's go."

The Ministry was packed in the Atrium but the upper floors were fairly empty, especially wizegamot which looked abandoned for the day. 

Sirius told me the members had gone for a private meeting with the Minister of Magic, something that happened monthly for future policies and that I had nothing to worry about. 

I let him lull me into the safety as we got to the Aurur training centre where Alastor was busy with the strategists mulling over the map on the corner table. 

Sirius stepped in front of me so subtly that I supposed only I noticed. I rolled my eyes. Stupid male instincts to protect. I secretly loved it.

"We've been waiting for about half an hour now." Williamson scowled.

I snagged Sirius's hand so as to not punch this man in the face. Sirius seemed to know if the twitch of his lips was any indication.

"He'll be offended by your smile," I whispered to him.

"His existence offends me."

"Have you been reading a book on male pride and how to make enemies solely through breathing?"

"Why'd I read something I could write myself?"

I laughed quietly and his hand squeezed mine and I knew he was happy.

"Come on here, boy." Alastor called Sirius. "We've got something we need you to look at."

Sirius looked at me and I nodded before he let me go. Though I regretted it the moment Williamfuckingson strutted towards me with a half smile that didn't hold anything gentle or friendly in it.

"Long time, Hawke."

"Black." I corrected him with a glare.

"Black then," he whistled lowly. "We've had peace without you bringing drama here this month and the last one."

I rolled my eyes, "Don't you have something better to do, Auror Erik?"

I'd found out his first name only a short while ago and it was delighting to see the surprise flare in his eyes.

"Aren't you a wicked little delight? What do you have over that poor old bastard that he favours you this much?"

I looked over to where Moody stood and   furrowed my brows, "He just doesn't like you, Erik. He doesn't favour me."

His eyes narrowed, "You and your family have been a curse over the Ministry for years, Hawke. And I'm more than happy to get rid of obstacles and threats for the country."

Before I could reply, with a stupid retort mentioning his receding hairline, Sirius strode this way, his eyes shooting daggers at Erik.

"If you so much as touch a hair on her head, I will ruin your life."

"There won't be any need for that," Glared Williamson, "I have said what I needed to. Good day, Black."

I think Sirius might've burned holes in his head as he left but I don't find it in myself to scold him. I'm overwhelmed and suddenly exhausted.

"Elena?"

"I feel fatigued." I let him know.

"Merlin, woman." Sirius sighs sarcastically but I see a hint of panic in his eyes. "Sit the fuck down for some time and then I'm taking you home — no more arguments."

"I don't want to stay home alone." I make a face at him.

"Will you miss me?"

"So fucking much, Padfoot." And I'm not lying. Everytime he leaves me, my heart falters.

I might have seperation anxiety but ever since the pregnancy I've needed him in a carnal way, an unquenchable need for him has coated my heart.

"I'll snatch the two way mirror from James to give to you." He says with a half smile and I laugh.

Sirius' smile drops at something he sees behind me and instantly, his hands are around me in a protective manner.

I turn around to see what's caught his attention when my own smile drops.

It's Ella.