Fatal Accident (C.L. & C.S.)

54. I am so, so sorry...

Carlos' POV

"We were supposed to celebrate our birthday together.... You know you broke the deal and... Yeah, you're the one who broke it." – I spoke to her grave as I leaned my shoulder against it with my face decorated with drained tears.

I looked to my left at her grave and tried not to cry. The day Charles told me she died, I felt like I lost the piece in my soul. It felt like I lost it forever and like I won't ever get it back.

"Where the hell were you? I called you hundred times Charles!" – I yelled at him standing up from the couch and walking over to the door that was connected to the living room as soon as I heard them opening.

He looked drained, his face pale and his shirt was bloody. I immediately got scared while he still didn't look me in the eyes, but rather passed by me.

"You are not walking away without an explanation Charles. What happened last night? Where were you? Why is your shirt bloody? For god's sake say some-" – I started yelling but he cut me off. "Jenna is dead!" – His voice broke as he screamed out and I saw his eyes getting filled with tears not for the first time, judging by his face.

"W-what?" – I barely whispered and managed to say something. I didn't believe it. I didn't believe this would come this soon. "No, you're lying Charles. Tell me you're lying." – I shook my head but he looked down at the floor and stayed silent.

Silence was never this bad. Never this quiet.

"No I don't believe you, you are lying." – I spoken up one more time before he added. "Last night she had car crash... I uh... I saw it happen in front of me and... If I didn't go after her... Maybe that would've never happen." – I shot glaze at him as his last words came out almost as a cry for help.

I stormed towards him and took his shirt in a grip of my hand making him back away and hit the counter behind him.

"What did you do?" – I yelled at him tightening the grip on his shirt while my eyes got tearful. His tears already spilled down his cheeks and I felt anger. Along sadness and emptiness.

"Oh my god..." – I whispered backing away from him and starting to breathe heavily. I couldn't believe she was gone. It was too unrealistic to believe those words that it hurt when realization hit me.

It hurt in my chest... In my soul, there was hole that won't be filled by anything else but her smile right now. And I know I won't get to fill it. Ever.

"We planned out the theme Jenna... We said it was going to be red themed like Ferrari... And that we will celebrate it in Spain..." – My voice broke at my last words and I decided to stop.

Imagining how could've it been just makes it hurt more and right now more pain is not what I am searching for. There was not many people at her funereal. Only Charles, Lewis, her best friend and I. Nobody else. Not her sister, her father... No one except for us.

"Charles didn't come out of his room in two days... I am not sure if he has eaten anything." – I spoke again now looking in front of myself. "I wish you were here, Jenna. We all really miss you." - After a long pause I managed to say more. Even though I believed she couldn't hear me.

I got up and dusted off my pants when I looked at grave and then up at sky. "I hope you're at better place. You deserve it. You deserve to rest. I'll come back as soon as I can with new white roses." – And then I walked away.

Charles' POV

I sat at her grave for about twenty minutes without a word. Carlos was here yesterday and he told me to come here too as he said he felt a little bit closer to her.

But I don't. I still have this stupid feeling in me that won't go away. Everyone told me it would eventually but clearly none of them lost the person this dear and close to them.

"I am really sorry." – I managed to say. Did I feel guilty for her death? Hundred percent... "If I just didn't go after you..." – I started but then stopped feeling gulp forming in my throat that didn't allow me to speak normally anymore.

"I hope you meet my dad... He would've really liked you I know it." - I added.

"I am so, so sorry..." – I whispered out as tear ran down my face. I felt cold breeze of air on my right arm and my hand shivered under it. The tree that was nearby let its leaves dance to the melody it created.

And in that moment I knew... She was watching over me.

The End...

I want to thank you all for support through book. I hope you enjoyed it and I hope it disappointed you less than Ferrari did last season. But this will be our season. I am not doubting in our boys in red. 

Once again, thank you all and I would be more than pleased to hear your comments and thoughts on story.