Collision || Lee Know

appreciating you in many ways

I'd lie when saying I slept last night. After the call ended the only thing I did was staring at the ceiling. That was quite noticeable since my eye bags were clearly shown, not forgetting that I couldn't even fully open my eyes due to tiredness. No matter how much I wanted to sleep, I waited for him to ring the bell. I was scared of what our relationship could turn into now. Long-distance romance was definitely not what I was aiming for in first place. Without denying, the worst would probably be not being able to see him in person.. Being able to touch him, kiss him or just expirence so many things together.

"It's for me," I shouted, heading towards the door. I've somehow never felt so nervous seeing him. I slowly opened as I spotted him casually inviting himself for the night. My gaze travelled up to his eyes again, which looked almost guilty at me. "Don't do that," I quietly whined. "What?" He blinked several times. "Look at me like it'll be the last time or some." He analysed my face before dropping his bag onto the floor. "It won't be." Unexpectedly, Minho pulled me in for a tight hug. It felt warm and almost like his whole being was slowly wrapping itself around my body. "I've missed you, Taerim," I heard him whisper as I sniffed in his scent. "I did too." Slowly, my arms made their own way around his torso as well. 

_

He placed his stuff into my room, sitting down onto the bed. Without further thinking about it, I got straight to the topic. "When will you leave?" No better, how much time is left for us.. He sighed before answering. "It's noticeable how things start to get neat around the place right now. They will have to be out in a year.. I will already leave before that though," he answered. "When exactly?" Maybe I was too harsh. He scratched his neck, focusing on the floor. "One to two months, I don't know yet." I went through my hair. This was so unexpected that I couldn't even mentally prepare myself. "For two years?" My voice almost broke while talking. "Three," he quietly corrected me. "Minho," I slightly complained even though I knew it wasn't his fault. "I don't want it either." He stared forward.

I wanted there to be another way too badly. I didn't want him to leave just like that. "I'll come on semesters. I'll also be there on Christmas." He tried to make it sound less upsetting. "Mh," I only hummed, sitting down beside him. I never felt that way. I didn't even know how I should spend the rest of the day with him.. Or better, even the night. It was tensed right now and I honestly just wanted to bury myself into the bed and catch up the sleep I didn't receive. He gently grabbed onto my hand, observing my face with a worried expression. I want it to work out with us... Still I was just confused right now.
"Will it," he started. "Be okay with you like that? I'm honest...I don't wanna force you. It can only work out when both are ready for it." I faced the side, inhaling deeply. I don't want to doubt our relationship.. Really not. "Taerim," he spoke, squeezing my hand lightly. I could tell he's afraid I might deny. "Hmm, let's try it that way...Maybe it won't be as worse as we imagine it." It will be, and I know it. I just don't want to regret stupid decisions I might make. He gave me a small nod. "I'm so sorry." I carefully pulled my hand back. "Stop apologising, it's not even your fault." Maybe I was a bit sensitive right now.

_

In the first ten minutes we ended up on our phones, unusually far apart in my bed.
After about twenty minutes I noticed him coming closer and a few moments after that I was basically craving his touch as well. I can't sit still next to him, so I'm just asking myself how it would be when he's that far away that I couldn't even possibly reach him. I laid my leg over his as he, after some time, placed his free hand on top of it. I think he broke the ice with his following move. "Look at this," he chuckled, holding the phone over to me as I automatically came closer. I believe it was some random video which showed up in his phone, but I could just not hold my laugh in. I let my weight fall onto him while giggling. His face filled with joy before I spoke up. "Wait, let me see it again." I pointed out, breaking completely out of laughter. For a minute I forgot all my worries, just him being right there seemed to somehow make me happy. "Here this one too," he chuckled. I hit his arm, giggling. "Where do you even find those?", "I don't know, they just casually pop up on which ever platform," he responded while I let my head rest onto his shoulder since it ended up there from laughing. "I wanna see more," I commented so he just shared his phone screen with me. Those small moments were enough for me.