Behind These Walls

(32) Set them free

Fille: "Talaga? Alam mo pa kung saan pinakamalakas ang kiliti ko?"

Napalunok na lang si Gretch sa sinabing iyon ni Fille. Base sa ngiti nito sa kanya eh alam niyang may kakaibang kahulugan iyon at hindi alam ni Gretch kung anong gagawin.

Gretch: "Sa paa?"

Kunwari na lang inosente siya. Natawa na lang si Fille sa kanya.

Fille: "You know what I'm trying to imply here, Gretch."

Naramdaman ni Gretch na dinikit ni Fille ang tuhod sa pagitan ng hita niya. Kinabahan si Gretch dahil kusang nagreact ang katawan niya nang hindi niya namamalayan. Umangat ang isang tuhod niya na siya namang sinakyan ni Fille.

Eyes fixed on each other, Gretch and Fille are slowly grinding against each other. Fille had this grin on her face. Gretch closed her eyes.

Fille: "Gretch.."

Gretch knew she needed to do something to stop what was happening, but couldn't make her body move.

Even when Fille started kissing her neck, Gretch had her eyes closed and is debating with herself.

Naramdaman niyang gumalaw ang kamay ni Fille papunta sa tiyan niya.. nagpaikot ikot ang daliri doon pababa sa butones ng shorts niya. Fille unbuttoned it and pulled the zipper down. Hindi pa din gumagalaw si Gretch.

Kinakabahan na si Fille. Nagdadalawang isip siya kung itutuloy niya ang ginagawa niya. Wala siyang nakukuhang reaction kay Gretch.. kaya mas mahirap. Baka bigla nalang siyang itulak o sigawan.

Pero dahil gusto niya din.. tinuloy niya.

Unti-unti niyang tinaas ang tshirt ni Gretch. Hanggang sa ilalim ng bra. When Gretch's flat stomach was exposed, she slowly laid her hands on top of it.. and gently caressed it. She missed this.

Fuck. Sa isip ni Gretch. Kanina pa niya pinipilit ang sariling gumalaw at pigilan si Fille pero hindi niya magawa. She's scared.. pero she is longing for Fille. Fille's touch.. her kisses.. her moans.. her body.. her love.

Nang makaakyat ang mga kamay niya sa may bra ni Gretch ay napakagat labi ito. Ayaw mong umungol ah. Sa isip ni Fille.

So she started kissing her stomach.. gently licking and sucking, leaving some marks. Then she went up to the bra again.. and pulled it up in an instant.

Aaaahhhh shit

Napangiti si Fille sa kanyang tagumpay. Nagpatuloy siya sa ginagawa sa hinaharap ni Gretch at napahawak na ang kamay nito sa ulo niya.

Inaamin ni Gretch na nasasarapan na siya pero hindi mapalagay ang damdamin niya. They haven't talked about things between them.. and she certainly hasn't forgotten why they broke up in the first place.

She thought she'd just have to let this moment pass.. pagbigyan niya lang sana ang gusto ng katawan niya. Pero that would be it.

But when she felt Fille slowly pulling down her underwear.. she saw images of Fille doing it to someone else...

Gretch: "Stop!"

Napatigil naman nga si Fille. Nagkatitigan ang dalawa. Kita sa mata ni Gretch ang galit.

Fille: "I'm sorry."

Pero nang makita ni Gretch ang sakit sa mata ni Fille eh nawala din agad ang galit niya. It was something she hated the most about herself. She can't stand it when she sees hurt in Fille's eyes. Alam nila Alyssa yun. Kaya that night in the bar they didn't let Fille talk to her kasi alam nilang madali itong bibigay. That time in Antipolo she had to run away.. kasi pag tumagal pa silang magkasama hindi na matitiis ni Gretch si Fille.