Behind These Walls

(38) The Promise

"Dennise."

Tinignan ni Dennise kung sino ang nakabunggo niya. Namuo ang luha sa kanyang mga mata.

Hindi na napigilan ni Dennise ang sarili at niyakap niya ito..

"Anong problema?"

Umiling iling lang si Dennise. Sa sobrang dami ng naiisip at nararamdaman niya ay hindi niya alam paano sisimulang sabihin at ipaliwanag ang lahat.

"Tell me. Please."

Hindi alam ni Dennise kung ano ang sasabihin niya. Hindi niya din maintindihan ang sarili niya. She's becoming paranoid.

She loves Alyssa. She loves Alyssa so much.

Alam niyang nagbago na si Alyssa. Mula noong naging sila wala namang kahit isang maling ginawa si Alyssa. In fact.. Alyssa has been the perfect girlfriend. She's trying to give Dennise everything she can. Ngumingiti ito sa ibang mga babae pero hindi siya nagpapacute dito. Magalang niya ring tinatanggihan ang mga lumalandi sa kanya.

Dennise knows the issue is not Alyssa.

It's her.

She keeps on thinking that there's something wrong.. kahit wala naman. Na kailangan niyang may patunayan sa lahat ng ibang tao. Na kailangan niyang makipagkumpitensya sa lahat ng ibang babaeng nagpapapansin kay Alyssa. Na kung hindi niya ito kakapitan ng maigi eh may aagaw nito sa kanya.

Natatakot siya na mawala si Alyssa sa kanya.

Dennise: "I really don't know."

Alyssa: "Is it something I did? Something I said? Please tell me. Hindi ko na alam gagawin ko honey."

Bumitaw si Dennise sa pagkakayakap kay Alyssa at tumingin siya sa mga mata nito.

Matapos magwalk out ni Dennise sa dance floor ay nagulat si Alyssa kaya hindi siya nakasunod agad. Pero nang makabawi sa pagkagulat eh tumakbo siya agad palabas para habulin si Dennise.

Alyssa: "I don't understand why you are acting like this. First the body shots.. and the dancing. Lasing ka na ba? Do you want to just go home now?"

Dennise: "Sorry.. sorry.. sorry.."

Alyssa: "Shhhhhh. Stop saying sorry. I'm not mad. I just want to understand why. Please tell me. Para naman maayos natin kung ano man to."

Dennise: "Wala.. wala ka namang maling ginawa. Ako to. Ako ang problema."

Alyssa: "Why? What's wrong?"

Dennise: "I'm scared."

Alyssa: "Scared of what?"

Dennise: "Of losing you."

Despite the rain pouring down their faces and bodies, Alyssa can see the tears streaming down Dennise's eyes.

Alyssa: "Bakit mo naman iniisip na you'll lose me?"

Dennise: "I don't know.. what if.. what if you find someone else who's prettier than me? sexier? Someone who can make you feel better.. someone better in bed. Someone better than me. What if--"

Alyssa: "What if you believe in me? What if you believe me when I say no one else compares to you? What if you trust in my love for you, that I don't care about anyone else but you? Dennise maniwala ka sa kin.. I love you. Mahal kita. Mahal na mahal kita."

Dennise can see the pain in Alyssa's eyes. It hurt her too. It's hard for Dennise to think that she's hurting Alyssa because of loving her too much.. but she really doesn't know what to do.