Shameless [Hyunminchan]

chapter 44

I was up and about while Hwang was sleeping on my bed like a pig. His legs spread out everywhere and the blanket wasn't even covering him. His hair was messy and he had a cute pouty look while he was asleep.

Normally, I'd get angry for being kicked but I held back knowing Hwang was pretty tired of dealing with Bang and me. I was in the bathroom of our hotel room, staring at myself in the mirror. My body was sore and my ass hurt.

Last night was a craze but I had no regrets. Hwang had been the only person I'd let fuck me, plus another grumpy iceberg who refuses to let us in. I still don't get what his problem is.

I've been nothing but nice, I gave him space but maybe he needs more time. He looked pretty stressed out yesterday. I looked back at myself again, love bites on my neck. Was it from love? That's just merely what the mark was called, I couldn't tell if Hwang did it out of love.

My lip was a bit red and bruised but not the ugly kind, most of the pain and unusual look was from Hwang. Forget most, all it was. But I couldn't blame him, we both had a blast.

I started brushing my teeth putting toothpaste on the small white Brussels and rubbing it against my teeth tasting the mint toothpaste. I looked up to see Hwang looking clumsy and drowsy, his eyelids were half open while his lips were pink and plump.

"Good morning," He said back hugging me and stuffing his face in the crook of my neck. My response was pretty muffled with the toothbrush in my mouth but he heard. "Does your body hurt?" He asked rubbing my stomach gently while caressing my hips.

I shook my head signing a 'no,' which was a complete lie but it's not like it was gonna hurt forever. I took the toothbrush out spitting the leftover in my mouth and rinsing out everything with water.

When I turned around my back was hitting against the counter while both Hwang's hands were on either side of me keeping me locked in some cage. He smiled leaning in but I pushed him away in disgust.

"I just brushed my teeth, brushed yours, and then you can get my kiss." I giggled duckling under his arms and walking away with a hint of speed.

Now that I think about it, Bang must be lonely. I felt a familiar feeling of guilt hit me like an arrow. Bang was dealing with whatever by himself which earned him some sympathy from me. I don't know about Hwang since he seemed pretty pissed yesterday.

I walked back to the bathroom to see Hwang washing his face.

"Do you feel bad for Bang?" I asked hesitantly. The happy mood on his face disappeared and he glared at me through the mirror.

"He could fuck himself for all I care." Hwang rolled his eyes rinsing off the soap from his face.

"I'm gonna talk to him," I said leaving not giving Hwang a chance to respond or even reason me out of it. I know what I'm getting my self into when I walk in there.

I walked out of the room turning to the door right next to ours. It was silent on the other side but I heard faint sounds and I couldn't tell what it was. I knocked on the door lightly.

"B-bang?" I called him. No response. I knocked again, "Are you in there?" I asked again. I'm not gonna leave without getting a response. "If you don't open it, I will but it open instead." I threatened not even believing I could.

I still got no response which led me to plan B. Bust it open. But when I grabbed the doorknob it was already unlocked, well this was unexpected. I welcomed myself in his hotel room looking around. His black suitcase was on the floor. I walked in further to see a tired-looking Bang, his eyes were puffy while he held a book in his hand. There were marks of dry tear stains on his cheek and his hair was a mess.

"Are you okay?" I asked in concern but I kept my distance from him. Not that I wanted to stay so far.

"Do I look okay?" His voice sounded dreading, with a tense dryness to it.

"Did– did you cry?" I asked. He really did look like he could use a buddy.

"Take a wild guess," He retorted, his brows creasing.

"Your humor has gotten pretty strong today," I joked hoping I could make him feel a bit better.

"Thanks," He said laying his head back and letting it rest on the headboard. "Do you plan on standing there?" He asked keeping his eyes shut and putting the book down on his lap.

"Do you want me to?" I asked. This was probably the most normal but heart-touching conversation Bang and I had. There was a pause of silence between us, Bang had his mouth open but the words hadn't left his mouth.

"Yeah. . ."

I felt a smile smile grow on my face, I walked to his bed sitting down but keeping a small distance between us. I didn't know if Bang was comfortable yet so I played it safe.

"Wanna talk about it, or. . ." My voice trailed off not knowing how to continue the sentence.

"I guess," He said sounding a bit sad. My heart ached to see him like this. This wasn't the Bang I was used to, he was a cold iceberg. Not a gentle ocean that was empty with no life. He could've been so much more, the rain to grow a blooming flower.

A blooming love.

But we weren't there yet. Now I hope, maybe in the future.

"Hwang's pretty pissed," I said laying out the truth to him. Why would I want to lie to his face miserable as he is?

"I know," He said, soon after I felt Bang's head on my lap which made me stiffen up a bit.

"Relax," He started. "I'm not gonna kill you." He joked chuckling lightly.

"Right. . ." I said joining his light laugh. We sat in comfortable silence. That was until I heard a soft sob coming from Bang. I looked down to see a tear streaming down his face while his hands were covering his face. "What happened? Are you–"

"I'm fine," He sped. "I'm fine." He repeated inhaling deeply before letting his chest down and exhaling.

"You don't seem fine," I said feeling bad. Bang didn't say anything but kept wiping the tears that fell. I took the courage to let my right hand softly brush against his hair before I started massaging his head a bit. I could tell Bang felt a bit better when his breathing was more relaxed and his face didn't look so stressed out.

"Thanks." He said. My head was hovering right above his, having my hair drape above me while I looked down at Bang who opened his eyes slowly. We made eye contact and our gazes hadn't fallen.

"What if I said I wanted to kiss you?" I asked bravely. I wasn't lying though. I really did, Bang looked so weak right now and I felt the urge to protect him though I could barely save my own life.

"I'd let you." He said. I took that as a sign to lean down and touch his lips. It was soft and gentle. Not a single bit of lustfulness which I was grateful for. A few seconds later I pulled up having my breath fall down on him. 

"That wasn't so bad." I chuckled lightly brushing my hand across Bang's face.

"You're fucking beautiful." He breathed. 

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