On the road with her group, she comes across two people who introduce her to a whole new world of fighting and family. And in that world, is a young boy who falls deeply in love.
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chapter forty eight
WHAT TO DO? They had been found. She had found them. The one person Carmen hoped would never arrive, was here, right now. And of course, she was asking for the one thing Carmen didn't want to give her.
Lydia.
Lydia was her and Daryl's responsibility now. And after all the traumatic stories Carmen had heard from that young girl's memory, it would go against everything Carmen had fought for to send her back.
But, was war worth one girl? Was it worth the sacrifices, the deaths, the many more people she could lose. The many more times she could be lined up and forced to watch her people die. Was it worth it?
Maybe not. But Carmen wasn't in charge. She was just a bystander in this situation. She had to let Daryl decide, even if what he wanted to do was different to what she wanted to do. Even if he was willing to let that girl go, let her get beat, let her tell them everything about this place. If that's what he wanted to do, she had to follow along with it.
Carmen wasn't scared of Alpha, she was angry. She was so angry that she could just storm out those gates and cut her head right off. So angry she could bring Lydia out and call Alpha out on everything she had ever done. So angry she could become the same person she was six years ago.
The way she felt towards Alpha was exactly how she felt when she first met Negan. His sick smile, and the maniacal laugh that left his mouth as he faced Glenn...and Abraham. The way he mocked him, laughed at her outburst. The way he treated Daryl. The way he ruined her home. Ruined her life. She hated him. Just like she hated Alpha.
She hadn't even spoken to the woman. The woman didn't even know who she was. Yet she still felt an immense amount of hatred when she looked at her.
How could a mother hurt her child? That was the same question Carmen had. How could any parent hurt their child? You had to be sick. Psychotic. Out of your mind.
That's why Carmen didn't want kids. Oliver was like a little brother to her, but he still had family to look after him. She barely saw him now anyway, after what happened at Alexandria. After Jason had passed, his family were mourning, and their house had been completely blown to pieces, he had moved to the Kingdom.
But even he wasn't a full time responsibility for Carmen. She knew that if she did have kids, she'd probably turn out just like her dad. She was afraid of that. Afraid of hurting someone she loved. She was fully capable of killing someone. She had those rage-filled outbursts that put not only her but everyone in a bad mood. If she did all that without a kid, imagine how she would be with one. She'd probably kill it.
But she wasn't to think about that. Her main focus was how she was gonna get rid of Alpha to save Lydia's life. And by the time Carmen had snapped back into reality, nearly everyone was up there watching the scene.
