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"Hard times - gonna make you wonder why you even try. Hard times - gonna take you down and laugh when you cry. These lives - and I still don't know how I even survive hard times."

~Hard Times by Paramore~

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A/N: Had a rough week. I hope all of you are doing well.

Warnings: abuse, addiction, anxiety, homophobia, depression, domestic violence, grief, gun violence, language, panic attacks, sexual harassment/assault, violence, weapons, and other mature themes

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Zion's POV

Johnny insisted we go out to celebrate my inheritance, something his mom and stepdad did on special occassions when he was younger. Yaya decided to stay home and read her book for book club tomorrow.  And Miguel suggested Olive Garden, so here we are. 

I know it's a lot of money and that I should be ecstatic, but it's not really a triumph for me. I didn't do anything to get this inheritance. The only reason I have it in the first place isn't anything to be happy about. I feel wrong about celebrating and dedicating a whole dinner to it.

"So, does this mean you can start looking at Stanford, too?" Miguel asks me after we order our drinks.

"What?" I ask in surprise.

"Well, that is something to consider," Carmen says. We sat at a table rather than a booth because she's started showing more and needs the space. She seems to be handling the pregnancy well. "You now have money to further your education."

"I guess I've never really thought about college before," I say apprehensively as I look at Robby who also seems a bit surprised by the idea. We haven't even discussed anything past high school; we only just got Robby approved to come back to West Valley.

The waiter comes back over with our drinks. 

When she's gone, Johnny continues the conversation, "Well, you don't have to decide anything quite yet. All of you have an awesome senior year to look forward to. And now you, Zion," he raises his glass, "have a whole lot to be thankful for."

I smile despite the feeling that there's not a whole lot to be thankful for. Not with everything that's happened in the past two years. 

Nobody else at the table seems to share my feelings, though, so I push them down.

"My senior year was supposed to be the most badass year of my life," Johnny says, "until LaRusso came to town."

"We know, Dad," Robby acknowledges.

"Still, I was a stud," Johnny grins as he looks between Robby and Miguel. "Just like I'm sure you two will be."

"I just want the year to be normal," Miguel admits.

"Yeah, and I already have the hottest girl in The Valley," Robby takes my hand with a smile. I blush. 

"But, wait, you're not dating Sam?" Miguel questions as if to challenge him. 

"Miggie," Carmen tries to mediate the playful tension. Robby squeezes my hand then quickly releases it; I glance at him wearily.

Miguel gives a half-assed apology that completely misses his mom's point, "Sorry, Zion," then he give me a small, taunting smile.

I nod in forgiveness before turning back to my boyfriend. He looks concerned about something. Then I glance at Carmen, and I can tell she's still nervous around Robby. Johnny looks blissfully unaware.

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