| TAEHYUNG'S POV;
I'd rather lie than to hurt you a thousand times. I'd rather you hate me than you pity me. It's best that you don't know so you won't come looking for me. It's best that you hate me for leaving you so you won't feel lonely when I'm finally gone. I would take all your pain cause that's the only thing I could do right now.
I love you, Y/N but I'm afraid I'm not capable of giving you happiness anymore. I wanted to be the man you dreamt of. I want to be with you more than anything else.
I wish I could continue to lie but I couldn't anymore. It broke my heart when I saw how much pain I inflicted on you when I said I didn't love you anymore. You thought I left you and walked out of your life forever. No. I could never do it. Not even when you found someone else to take care of you. I could never stop loving you; you're the girl I swore to love and protect with my life.
I don't want to lie.
I never disappeared from your side. I was always there beside you. I was there when your first argument happened and he kicked you out of his apartment. I purposely left my umbrella at the bus stop so you won't get drenched by the rain. I should've stayed there with you but I'm afraid I'll change my mind and won't be able to stick to my plan.
I was there when he cheated on you, when you celebrated your first year anniversary but he took another girl to his home. I was there when he popped the big cherry and proposed to you. You don't know how much pain I felt just watching there as you shed tears of joy that he didn't deserve. I didn't want you to know all of this, Y/N because it would only hurt you and you don't deserve that.
"I love you. I always did." You smiled and kissed me right away. "It wasn't a lie." I added.
"How will I know?" You asked innocently, cocking your head to one side as you fix your doe eyes at me.
"You won't." I answered and softly touched your cheek, feeling your warm skin, "You just have to trust me. Do you?"
You nodded, snuggling closer, planting your wonderful scent on my pillows and sheets. You left your fiancé and went away with me. I couldn't be happier but everything has an end to them. Eventually, I stopped being happy as the days with you went by. I began to worry on how you'll take the sudden news. The ominous future of you and me.
"I'm home." I wrapped my arms snuggly around your waist and rested my head on your shoulder. I'm too tired. I feel like my knees would give out under me at any time but I have to be strong for you. I have to act as though I'm fine until I gather all the courage I needed.
"Taehyung, are you okay?" You rushed to me when I fell to my knees on the way to the bathroom. I clutched on my chest, trying to catch onto my fleeting breath. "Taehyung, what's wrong?" You began to panic, "Are you feeling sick again?"
"I'm fine." I panted as I tried to smile and pretend it's nothing but I'm afraid it won't work anymore.
I'm losing my sight of you. "Y/N.."
I woke up on a hospital bed and you were sitting in that uncomfortable chair, asleep. I can't help but notice how puffy your eyes were. You must've discovered what was wrong with me, why I was feeling sick most of the time and why I had to lie about the pills that was hidden away from your sight.
"Tae, you're awake, how are you feeling?"
"I'm sorry." I said, my hand reaching for yours. You looked too fragile to be broken again. "I was going to tell you.. I didn't want you to find out this way."
"It's okay." You squeezed my hand even though you were as scared as me. I know because your eyes spoke the truth even when your lips spilled lies, "It doesn't matter right now. You're going to get better. I'll help you."
"Y/N, I'm not asking you to stay. You can leave if you want. It will only be harder from now on and I can't promise anything to you." I said, "You know that my sickness is not something that can be easily treated. It won't go away that easily."
"No. You'll get better." You pulled me in and hugged me, your warmth soothing all my worries. "I'm going to stay, no matter how hard it gets. We'll face it together."
You were there every step of the way, encouraging and motivating me to become stronger. You are the reason I still breathe. You are the reason why I keep fighting even when I feel like the pain would break me everytime. I say your name and it gives me strength to fight back. It's because of you that I want to live.
"Y/N!!" I woke up to the excruciating pain again. I'm beginning to lose myself as I cried and cried. You held me close, waiting for this pain to subside because medicine cannot relieve it anymore, "Please make it stop.. Please. It hurts so much, Y/N. Make it stop.."
You cried with me, your tears endlessly flowing from your eyes but you stayed silent, wiping them away with your hand when I could've been doing that for you. I'm sorry, Y/N.
"Tae, you have to fight back. You're strong, right?" Your voice was shaking from the sobs. I closed my eyes and heard only your voice despite the pain, I was glad it was your voice that was telling me to fight.
"Just tell me if you can't do this anymore." I told you as you pushed my wheelchair towards the kitchen, "I know how hard this his for you so I will understand if you leave."
You stopped and knelt in front of me, a bright smile on your face, "I'm not leaving. You have to get better. We pinky promised to protect each other, right?" You held out your pinky finger. "Right?"
I smiled and linked my pinky finger with yours, "Right."
You flashed me a wider smile as you looked at me, "You have to eat a lot, okay? Then I'll drive you to the doctor for your therapy. What do you want to eat for lunch?"
"Y/N?" I started, your back was against me as you prepared the food, "How can you continue to love me when I look like this? I can't even recognize myself when I look in the mirror."
You turned around and smiled. A warm, peaceful smile that easedy the storm in my heart. "To me you're still the Kim Taehyung I love. I don't think any mirror could change that. I'll recognize you even if you change your name or even if you change bodies. I'll recognize you anywhere because you're my Taehyung."
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ФанфикAn unusual collection of fluffy, funny, romantic, smutty with a subtle hint of kink Bangtan stories. ⚠️ WARNING ⚠️ 1. Handle your feels well 2. Don't read in a public place if you don't want people to think you're a crazy person giggling all by yo...