When William, the man who abused me for years, says that to me, I feel my heart shatter. Emptiness consumes the small pieces, drenching every inch of my heart in terror.
Instantly, my eyes gloss over with tears, & the memories flood my brain: William pouring hot, fresh tea down my body, he punching me in the same place over & over to make me sore, & his raping me in the middle of the night.
I've spent my entire life living in fear of him. I just wanted him to die. One day, I mustered up the courage & found Leo. I felt like a coward, but that's because I am.
I may act like I don't care, I don't have feelings, & I just want to party, but I can't bare the thought of William. It makes me remember how my skin felt when he dragged the belt along it or how my scalp felt when he pulled my hair mercilessly.
I hate him.
Without realizing it, I drop the phone, then I head down to the basement, my emotions overpowering me. I can't do this. I can't.
When I get down to the basement, I decide I want to forget everything. Without a second thought, I grab a can of beer, pop it open, & start to chug. I don't care. I refuse to let these feelings control me.
Already on my fourth beer, I feel myself get lost in reality. Things become blurry, & the world starts spinning - or stops. I don't know.
As the cool liquid travels down my throat, I lose my balance & fall on the couch, my beer spilling all over. It doesn't matter.
Nothing matters.
//
Sorry for everything, guys. Sorry I can't write, sorry I can't be perfect, & sorry I'm myself. I'm so sick of being controlled. I am my own fucking person. If one thing is out of place, the world ends, right?
Right.
YOU ARE READING
That '70s Style (Book 1)
FanfictionWhen Danielle Pierce meets her dad, Leo, he introduces her to his social group, meaning Eric Forman and his friends. She soon becomes best friends with the guys, but she can't shake off her past, which is endlessly haunting her. As time passes, an...
