It's All So Beautiful *Roger Taylor Fanfic*

A New Life Is Born

January 1st 1977

Queen had only recently released their fifth album, A Day At The Races, when they went back to studio to record the next one. Everything was moving so quickly and going so well it felt like I was in a whirlwind. However, Roger told me one evening how he was starting to realise that their record company was screwing them over and they were furious.

The company they were with weren't even a record company, they were a production company and they would sell the album to a record company and they would get the money for it, not Queen. Roger realised one of the manager's bought a Rolls Royce and he knew something was up.

Eventually they met another manager who was fair and simple. One thing that changed was Roger got a few inches cut off his hair. He told me he didn't want to look like a girl anymore and he was contemplating growing a beard. I laughed at him in the beginning but I realised it actually did bother him, how people always mistook him for a girl. He never actially fully comitted to the beard thing but he did let a bit of stubble grow out, instead of shaving it off immediately whenever it grew.

I was utterly shocked one evening when I came home from shopping and saw Roger had cut his hair up to where it was just about sitting on his shoulders. Rogers hair was always his pride and joy and he always made sure it looked okay so for him to cut his long luscious locks this short was baffling to me. However his excuse was the same, he didn't want to look like a girl anymore. I realised it really affected him.

I was surprised to find that both John and Freddie also cut their hair short, Freddie to around the same length as Rogers, maybe a bit shorter, and Johns was a proper crew cut with a bit more hair on top. It seemed like the band were changing their style, maybe to show they were more serious and wanted to look professional or they just changed their style. Brian, however, didn't cut his hair at all. He told me he couldn't because his hair was naturally curly so it would grow out curly and he would look "ridiculous".

At this stage, our kids were nearly three years old. Time had literally flown by and they grew so quickly. They were both the same height and they were talking, saying full sentences. I saw that it made Roger so happy to see the kids grow up and talk and walk. He enjoyed spending time with them and it made me happy to see Roger spending time with them. One thing I wasn't fond of was Rogers disgusting habit: smoking. He tried to give them up and I saw that he really did try but he couldn't fight the cravings. After a while I sighed and gave up, accepting that maybe he just couldn't quit them.

Every night when I went to bed Roger tried to have sex with me. It made me slightly uncomfortable but I didn't give in. Besides, I felt apprehensive to do that when Elly and Aidan were next door and how they were so intuitive. I didn't want to cause any trauma for them. One night, I addressed him on it and he told me how he wanted another baby.

"Um, what?" I said, in disbelief. "What? I want another baby. Big deal." He said and went in to kiss me. I stopped him.

"Yeah it's a huge deal. Roger not to be mean but I don't." I told him. "But why not?" He asked. "Because, I'm finally getting back on track with work and I don't want to have another baby to push my career even further away. I feel we should wait until maybe a little while into the future?" I said. He sighed and lay down beside me. "Okay. I suppose. But that's why I bought this big house. So that we could have more kids and they couldn't run around." He whispered. "Soon." I replied. I felt guilty. Not that I didn't want another baby ever, I just didn't want another baby now. I didn't want that kind of thing again and not so soon. The twins were so young that we still had our hands full. I supposed Roger didn't seem to notice that.

For a few weeks Roger had been trying to persuade me to send the kids to pre school already and I kept telling him it was too early. He wanted to send them to school as soon as possible so that they could learn but they weren't ready. At least in my mind they weren't.

One afternoon Roger dropped a bombshell. That he and Queen were leaving on the 13th of January to go on a tour and they weren't coming back until June. I was shocked and I didn't want Roger to leave and to leave for so long. But I knew he had to and I was heartbroken. I didn't know how I was going to survive without him.