It's All So Beautiful *Roger Taylor Fanfic*

My Heart Did Ache

I woke up the next morning and immediately thought of what I had discovered last night. At the time I found out, I kind of just took it as it came... but now I was more concerned... and desperate for answers.

What really happened that night? Would Brian and I ever find out?

I took the moment of silence in the hotel room to appreciate the fact that Chrissie and Brian were no longer shouting at each other. They probably tired themselves out.

I got up out of bed and pottered around the room, trying desperately not to go into Brian's room and see what had happened.

I, instead, starting to organise all our clothes into our bags in an attempt to distract myself.

I was kind of loud as I did so, and eventually Luke stumbled out of his bed and into my arms.

"Good morning baby.." I muttered in my baby voice to him, even though he was now three years old.

"Hi mama..." he answered sleepily and snuggled his small blonde head into my chest.

Luke had been born with dark brown hair, and Roger and I were a bit confused as we both had light hair, but now Luke's hair had gotten extremely blonde, beach blonde. The boys in our family seemed to take after their dad, but Elly seemed to take after me, appearance wise.

Personality wise, I always felt Aidan was like me, a bit of a worrier, quiet,  always cautious, but he really did have a good heart when it came to his siblings. He was quiet but he did say what he felt and what was on his mind. I had always felt a very strong bond with Aidan because we were so alike.

Elly took after Roger. Strong, independent, not able to take no for an answer. Elly looked like me but she was a mental copy of Roger. I had always seen some bit of Roger in her, but now it was far more apparent. Roger and Elly really connected because they got on so well with each other. I felt like this would cause problems in the future when Elly became a teenager.

Luke, however, didn't seem to have a personality yet. He didn't say much, or show much interest in things. In saying that, Elly and Aidan were seven, so they had done a bit of growing up, but Luke didn't seem to really say much. The only person he felt comfortable talking to was Luke. He had never said anything to Roger.

Sometimes I was a bit worried about his development. Maybe this would mean some bad things, but he seemed to be okay for the moment so I just left it. He was just shy. He spoke to me and his siblings, but not Roger, and I couldn't understand why.

After a while of packing and watching Luke sit on the floor beside me, I was done and I brought Luke to the bathroom. When I came back out, I glanced over at my bed and saw Roger was awake.

"Good morning." He said with a stretch.

"Morning." I replied, dressing Luke.

"Morning little man. The other two aren't up yet, no?"

"No, not yet, its a bit early for them after all. Hey, Luke, why don't you go wake Elly and Aidan?" I said rubbing his hair before he ran off to their beds.

"I'm a bit worried about Luke..." I told Roger, watching his every move.

"Why?" He asked.

"Cause... he doesn't say much."

"He's shy."

"Yeah but... he talks to me and the twins. But not you. I don't know why."

"Maybe it's because I wasn't really around for the early days of his life. They say those are the most important ones." Roger said.

"Yeah... but Elly and Aidan call you Daddy. I thought he would understand."

"He knows I'm his dad. I just don't think he feels all that close to me. Maybe if he and I spend the day together sometime, we might connect better. Maybe I'm just a stranger to him."

"Well, we need to get him to say something to you before you go anywhere with him." I said.

"We'll get him to talk to me," Roger said. He sat up and wrapped his arm around my shoulders. "You're such a worry pot."

"I know I know... I'm sorry."

"Don't be. It shows you care. Luke is just.... different. That car crash has to have affected him in some way." Roger said.

Just then, Elly, Aidan and Luke all came running over and jumped on the bed, hugging and kissing Roger.

I smiled with pride as I saw Luke sit on Rogers knee and smile at something he said.

Maybe Roger was right. Maybe Luke just needed to connect with Roger.

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Later in the day, after staying in bed with the kids, I heard a knock at the door. I got out of bed and opened it to a distraught Brian.

"What's up?" I asked, motioning for him to come in.

"No.... can we talk out here?"

"Sure." I said, closing the door behind me.

"I'm done." He said.

"What?"

"With Chrissie. I'm done. She cheated on me with Roger. I can't handle this."

"But Brian... Roger said they barely did anything."

"I don't care! She was still with him. I understand that this doesn't bother you, but Chrissie and I are married and I really expected more of her."

"Brian, if you really love someone, you'll love them no matter what they've done. I know that all too well. I forgave Roger because I love him. And you love Chrissie. So just take it in your stride and forget about it. You don't want to lose her."

Brian pulled me into a hug. "Thank you."

He let go and I noticed he was crying.

"Brian...." I mumbled. "You're crying...."

I brought him over to the wall of the corridor and we sat against it. Brian laid his head into my chest and I wrapped my arms around him. I held him close as he cried. I had never seen him so vulnerable before.

A while later Chrissie stormed out of her room and saw us on the floor.

"Well isn't this cosy?" She said bitterly. "You're basically giving me an invitation to fuck Roger. Again."

"You wish, Chrissie." I spat. "Just fuck off."

Brian never raised his head but I felt his body rock more and I knew he was crying harder.

He didn't deserve this. Chrissie was a bitch and I would have done anything to get her back.

Instead I lay against the wall, holding a sobbing Bri as his world fell apart.