Choose G.D. & E.D.

Chapter 19

I woke up against Grayson's chest. He was softly snoring and his mouth slightly agape. My crotch hurt like hell.

I grab my phone off the nightstand and see that is almost 5pm. Damn. Well its going to be hard to sleep tonight.

I feel tired and sore so I get up and stumble to the bathroom to take another shower. I go in completely naked, because the bathroom is connected to Gray's room and, I don't care if he sees me naked now. We had sex. No, we made love. I'm so happy.

I walk into the bathroom and catch a glimpse of myself in the mirror. The first thing I notice is multiple bright purple and blue love bites. My cheeks flush red. I smile to myself as I reach in the shower and turn it on to get warm. I examine myself further. I look at my stomach and become embarrassed. I feel fat. I'm embarrassed he saw this. Maybe I shouldn't eat for a few days. Ugh. I wish I was prettier. I want to be prefect like him.

I step in the shower and being to just soak up the heat. It feels amazing. I go to grab the body wash and I notice something. I look down am I'm bleeding. Oh shit. I totally forgot about this. I'm glad it didn't happen while we were sleeping. My thoughts are interrupted by the sound of the bathroom door opening. I panic slightly before I realize its probably Grayson. He peeks his head through the shower curtain.

"Can I come in?" He said and his voice was still raspy from the nap.

I turned and covered myself with my arms, embarrassed but I'm not sure why. I nod and smile.

He walks in, already completely naked. I can't help but look at his member. I quickly look away so he doesn't catch me but its too late. He chuckles and smirks. I turn around so my back is facing him, my arms coving my chest and stomach. He comes close to me and wraps his arms around my wet body and grips my arms in his hands. He pulls them away from my torso and leaves them by my side.

"Baby, you're beautiful. I don't understand why you try to hide it." He says sounding slightly upset.

I take a deep breath and get the courage to completely turn around and face him. He looks me up and down and smiles.

"So beautiful." He mumbles.

He runs his finger tips lightly down my arms, starting at my shoulders. He reaches my hands then intertwines our fingers. He holds them before leaning in and giving me a deep kiss.

He stops abruptly and looks down, letting go of my hands.

"Babe." He says sounding startled or concerned.

I look down to see what he's looking at. Shit. Blood. I forgot to wash it down the drain. Well this is embarrassing.

I quickly kick it, trying to guide it to the drain as fast as I could. He stops me by lifting my head up to face his with his fingertips under my chin.

"Are you okay?" He says with the same look over seen before.

The day I almost drowned at the beach. He looks guilty and upset at himself. No.

"Grayson stop. Its normal. That was um, my first.. my first time so.. it uh.. it bleeds.." I say awkwardly.

Now that I think about it. I don't know if Grayson was a virgin or not. I never asked.

"Oh... I didn't know that happened. I thought I hurt you." He said quietly.

"Grayson, were you a virgin?" I ask boldly, and afraid of what the answer will be.

He just stands there quietly. Well, that's my answer. I try not to cry and I turn around and try to finish my shower. I feel a burning lump in my throat. And that is the worst pain. That feeling when you're trying as hard as you can not to cry but its almost eminent. He doesn't say anything at all as I finish doing whatever and turn off the shower and get out. I grab a to well and wrap it around my chest and tuck it under my armpits for extra security. I walk straight out into his room. I make sure I grab MY clothes and put them on. I only had one outfit here but its okay, Ethan washed it for me.

I quickly get dressed and throw the towel in my hair. Grayson hasn't came out of the bathroom yet. The shower is off I don't know what he's doing and I don't care. I take the towel out of my hair and walk to the kitchen. I'm starving so I grab a banana. I'm about to open it when I remember how fat I am so I put it down and just go sit on the couch. Cami and Ethan are no where to be found right now. I wonder where they are. I walk back to Gray's room to get my phone. I check it and I have a text from Cami.

"I don't know what the fuck you've been doing with them but you should back the fuck off of Ethan, you've already hurt him enough. I feel bad that Grayson has to deal with you being such a problematic slut. I'm going home, bye bitch."

Well that hurt. She's right. I am a slut. I'm dating Grayson. I kissed Ethan, and then had sex with Grayson and it wasn't even his first time. I feel so stupid right now. I wish I could erase this day from my life and start over. Just when I think it can't get worse, Ethan walks out of his bedroom. What if he heard me and Grayson earlier. Oh no.

As he steps out of the dark hallway I can see his face. Oh god no. He looks terrible. His face is all tore up, and bruised and its because of me. I'm a terrible person. I instantly start crying. He walks over faster to me and sits down beside me and puts his arm around my shoulder.

"Hey, hey, what's wrong?" He asks sympathetically.

"You." I sob. "Look at you. Its my fault. I'm a slut and I ruined everything. I'm so sorry."

He wipes away a few tears with his thumb and looks into my eyes.

"Jemma, stop blaming yourself. You know I kissed you. Stop taking the blame. I deserved it. I shouldn't try to make moves on my brothers girlfriend. If you love him then that's who you should be with." He says sounding kind of sad.

"You didn't kiss me!" I say kind of surprised. "I kissed you and its my fault." I say still crying.

"What? No you didn't. I leaned in. I did it." He says confused.

"No.. I did." I say also confused.

"Oh, well I guess we both did.." He lightly giggles.

I chuckle trying to lighten the mood and stop myself from crying.

"Well, I'm sorry." I say resting my hand on his bruised cheek softly.

He looks at me surprised. He stares into my eyes before he quickly gets off the couch.

"Uhm. Yeah, no problem. Don't worry about it." He says walking back towards his room.

Oh shit. I wasn't flirting. I probably made it seem like I was and it freaked him out. Ethan is confusing. Ill talk to him later. Fuck. The real problem is Gray. I love Grayson. No matter what. Grayson. I need to talk to him. What is he doing?