Choose G.D. & E.D.

Chapter 53

We pull up to the edge of the woods, I know all to well. It was a place I used to go with my mother before, and a place I took Grayson not too long ago. It was a very peaceful place. I should come more often.

"I remember this place." He said quietly and smiling down.

Its only been a few months but he looks different somehow. He looks, ... less.

He's still tall, buff, gorgeous, but there's something not there in his personality. The only way I can describe it as, is less. I'm just not sure.

We both stepped down out of the car and I made my way over to his side as he looked back and waited on me.

He instantly just interlocked his hand with mine as I met him at the edge of the woods, and it made me smile widely.

"You have no idea how much I missed you." He shook his head.

He sighed out heavily as he smiled at the ground. My heart beat faster and irregularly at those words. My hands started to slightly sweat.

"Well, I can't even explain what I've felt the past few months." I sighed.

He was holding my right hand, the hand in which holds my bracelet that means so much to me and the ring that changed everything. I brought my other hand over yo my wrist and began to spin the bracelet around my wrist.

"Well that's why were here right?" He asked as we stepped through the dry woods.

Branches cracking crisply under our feet was the only sound that could be heard.

"Hold on. This is bothering me." I said stopping as I took my hair out and tucked my bandana in my pocket.

I combed through my hair with my left, free hand as we walked. The feeling of my clean, soft hair on my back was some what relaxing.

"You're still beautiful." He sighed.

Heat flushed to my cheeks as I fought a smile. I kept walking and didn't respond. Well, mostly because I didn't know what to say.

I thought he would hate me.. but it seems I thought wrong. After everything I've done to him, all the hurt I've put him through, he's still being kind. On the inside it makes me happy, but I know I shouldn't get involved with him again. I'll just hurt him again somehow I know it. All I want is him, but the only thing I shouldn't have, is him.

***

We reach the same spot we had been to together a few months before. Of course we get here just before sunset.

I took in a deep breath and let it out as I took in the view. I should come here more often. Its so peaceful. The sky is whipped with orange and pink streaks and feathery light clouds. The pale yet bright colors cast a beautiful glow on Grayson's skin. His features illuminated perfectly as the beams shine through his loosely styled hair.

I look at him, examining his perfection and realize deep down this not could never love me as much as I love him. Which I good. I don't want to ruin his wife when he deserves better. A random breeze blows directly at me, pushing my hair back as I shiver.

He steps towards me.

"Let's talk." He sits down in front of me and pats the space beside him.

He pulled his knees up towards his torso and wrapped his arms around them loosely. His left hand gripping his right wrist. I sit beside him and run my fingers through the soft, cold, grass and look at the sunset. My legs stretched out flat as I lean back in my palms for support.

"So.." He started. "Why did you leave?" He said quietly as he looked over at me.

I looked at him as well. His beautiful eyes slightly glossed over. His eyebrows were slightly furrowed and he looked as if he were hurt. I shifted my position to sit with my legs crossed and my hands resting in my lap.
I sighed. "I've always been a problem for you guys. Especially you.." I looked down the the grass.

We sat quietly for a while.

"I just.. Didn't want to keep hurting you. You don't deserve it. You need better than just a stupid 17 year old girl like me." I admitted completely truthfully. "I love you, but you should never love me. You deserve someone so much better." I chocked as I let a tear fall.

I quickly pretended to look at something and nonchalantly wiped it away. I took a deep breath through my nose to where it couldn't be noticed and trued to calm down my broken heart, that I'm all to blame am the cause for.

"Why do you always fucking say that?" He raised his voice.

I looked at him wide eyed with the unexpected outburst.

"I know you love me. I know it! And I love you. I'm helplessly in love with you and you just left. I didn't even get a chance to say goodbye. But you know what? I'm glad I didn't. Because I'm never saying goodbye to you. Not unless you look me in the eye and tell me you don't love me at all. These past 3 months have been the worst 3 months of my life. I want you back. I love you. I'm in love with you. And I don't want to fucking lose you again. I want all of you, forever. You and me. Always." He said loudly.

He grabbed my wrist and pulled it towards him. He looked at the bracelet. "Mine." He looked at the ring in my thumb. "Mine." He let go of my wrist and brought his hand towards the top of my shirt. He pulled it down slightly revealing the chain of the necklace. He pinched it and pulled it above the shirt to see it. He nodded. "Mine."

He let go of it but remained leaned in close to me. I had tears of an unidentified emotion in my eyes. He put his hand in my cheek and leaned in closer. He brushed his lips against my lips as I trembled.

"Mine." He mumbled.

He pressed his lips against mine and pulled me closer. I melted into the kiss, being its everything I wanted but everything I don't deserve.

I pushed away reluctantly.

"Grayson." I breathed. "You don't want me." I said quietly. "After all this time.. You should hate me." I sighed. "I've hurt you so much."

He chuckled. "You're right, ... Its not easy being in love with you. Too bad I am." He crashed his lips back into mine as I leaned forward and passionately returned the kiss.

After a few minutes I broke away.

"Do you want to come see my house." I smiled and bit my lip.

"I would love to come see your new house." He smirked.

(Ooohh. 2 CHAPTERS LEFT! Who's gonna miss "Choose"? I will. And you have to wait til Friday for the next one. :') sorry. The book will be done on Sunday. OMG. My heart. Ok bye.)