so far this week has been the best week of my life since Caleb passed. Not that there hasn't been any other good times but this week has genuinely fun. we got ready for the day and handled some business and went to some meetings and then the rest of the day was ours. We stopped at in and out for some lunch and then headed to the mini boardwalk to hang with Hayden and his did and some others. Hayden, and Hayley and I all played with a basketball in the middle of the boardwalk. Hayley was in the middle and we just played and had fun. It felt like Caleb was back. When I was with Hayden and Hayley at the same time, it just made me feel like Caleb was back. Maybe that's why I liked Hayden so much. Because he reminded me of my old self and old life. He just gave me this good feeling. It was starting to get hot and this game was starting to get fun and I didn't wanna hold my phone so I asked Hayden to, since he had pockets and a bag. About fifteen minutes later, mommy and daddy said it was time to go. We all loaded up and said our goodbyes for the day. Once we got in the car and a little bit down the road I realized Hayden had my phone. We got it back with a few selfies to part with. Just five. Five selfies I'll always keep and look at. And remember. As we drove back to the hotel, I sat in silence of my own and thought about Hayden. Was this my first crush? Why do they even call it a crush? Is it because it crushes you? Because if so, l agree with that. It crushes you. I just wish I knew how Hayden felt. Or if he felt anything. I figured he was with Mackenzie so I didn't pursue anything. Not like I would, but still. Hayden was just nice to everyone and goofy, so every girl probably thought he liked them. I'm just some girl who falls for his swoony remarks and cute smirks. He's the first real boy who has ever like, showed interests in me. Brennan and Luke don't count, even though the entire fan base seems to want to count them. They are family friends, especially Luke. I didn't want Hayden to freak out when and if the fan base started to ship us and stuff. That was becoming a big fear.
