Let's Not Fall In Love

CHAPTER 22

Bullet's POV

Humigit si Choi ng malalim na hininga. "Bullet, as your friend, do you trust me?"

"Oo naman... pero ano ba ang gusto mong sabihin—"

Bigla niyang hinawakan ang magkabilang balikat ko at inilapit niya ang mukha niya papalapit sa mukha ko. Close enough like he was about to kiss me.

But then he did not kiss me.

I was caught off guard. Hindi ko itatanggi iyon. Ngunit mas pinili kong palawakin ang aking isip at pakinggan muna si Choi bago ako gumawa ng konklusyon.

Binitiwan niya ako saka muling humawak sa railings ng balkonahe.

He sighed. And if I was not mistaken, it was a sigh of relief.

"Salamat..." wika niya pagkakuwan. "Thanks for trusting me, Bullet. And sorry for doing that. Gusto ko lang kasing makumpirma sa sarili ko kung talagang ikaw nga ba."

"Choi, you know I like you..."—there was a long pause as I sighed—"...but as a friend."

Tumango siya. Kita sa mga mata niya ang pag-unawa.

"Naaalala mo pa ba noong welcome party para sa atin three years ago? Way back when we were Freshmen."

Tumango ako.

"There are bits of memories in my head that flashes back once in a while. Hindi kasi malinaw sa akin. Nagpapakalunod kasi ako noon sa alak. I was telling everyone that I was happy getting back with my girlfriend... Pero ang totoo ay malungkot ako noon dahil hiniwalayan na niya ako. Silly, right?" Muli siyang uminom ng alak. "I was was very confident to drink and get drunk that night because I know Rei would take care of me... Si Rei, lagi siyang nakaalalay sa akin. We've been friends since we've met. And I was—still am—very thankful I met him... Kaya okay lang na magpakalasing ako that time eh because he's be around. And I felt he will always be. And then I met the guys that night. And then there's you..."

I froze. Hindi ko inaasahan ang makahulugan niyang huling sinabi. Ako? "What about me?"

He smiled. "You were wearing the same shirt as Rei. May suot ka ding salamin dati. I wanted to tease you during that time... But I was too drunk. Hindi ko na din alam ang ginagawa ko.

"Before I knew it, you're already helping me walk to go back to my room sa dormitory. And then I kissed you..." Tinapos niya ang kanyang kuwento sa malamim na buntong hininga. "Or at least I thought I did..."

Naguluhan ako at nagtaka sa mga sinabi niya. Natatandaan ko kasi ang gabing iyon kahit matagal na. Alam kong hindi ko siya inihatid. Hindi kaagad ako nakaalis sa party dahil pinigilan ako nina Calix at Felix.

"Choi... ang naghatid sa iyo..."

Marahan siyang tumango. "I know... It wasn't you after all. Napagtagpi-tagpi ko lang lahat after all these years. I guess, my subconscious mind knew it all along. Takot lang akong aminin sa sarili ko na si Rei ang kasama ko noong gabing iyon.

"Rei has always been ny very good friend. And with what we have, natatakot ako na masira iyon if I try to go after him. I was also confused before noong akala ko dati ay ikaw ang kasama ko. It's because I never expected that I would fall for a guy... And my mind and heart were fighting between you and Rei—kung sino ba talaga. But now, Bullet, thanks for confirming that it's Rei. It was him all along."