DC COMICS IMAGINES

Heartless Assassins and Fluffy Stuffed Animals

Writing Prompt: A heartless assassin must put stuffed animals around themselves when they sleep to keep from rolling off their bed.

Warning: Language

v/n - Vigilante Name

f/c - Favorite Color

Italics are your thoughts

Working with the Justice League was no joy for v/n. Having to follow their rules and whatnot wasn't enjoyable. v/n was born to be a heartless assassin. Not the Justice League's lapdog. Especially Batman. He treated them like a little kid, and they were tired of it. v/n had finished with her 'work' so they made their way back to their apartment in Gotham City when they ran into one of the Batkids.

"Well, what do we have hereeee," Spoiler exclaimed.

"A tired assassin who wants to go home and sleep for a week," v/n grumbled.

"Cheer up v/n!" Spoiler said as she skipped her way towards v/n, "The night is still young and..."

"He needs me for something doesn't he," v/n Interrupted.

Spoiler stopped in her place and looked at v/n with amusement. She continued her way towards v/n and stopped about three feet in front of them.

"How'd you know?" She asked tilting her head to the side a bit.

"You guys tend to avoid me at any costs. The only time you or the bat brats try to engage in conversation with me is when Batman needs me for a stupid job that he can't do or needs help with."

"Okay, you caught me. He needs you to report to the Batcave."

y/n just stared at Spoiler and groaned. Couldn't he wait until morning or something? They thought.

v/n sighed and said, "Go tell that fucking emo looking, burnt walnut to talk to me about missions in ten hours or at least after I get an adequate amount of sleep to actually function like a fucking human being and not a damn robot."

"Alrighty then," Spoiler murmured as she back away from the tired assassin. After she made sure she was far enough from y/n, she made her way to the Batcave to tell Batman exactly what v/n said.

After walking and making sure to avoid the batfamily y/n arrived at their apartment living room window. They slowly opened it and made their way in. While making their way to their bedroom, they began to discard their outfit and weapons, not caring where they landed and if they were visible or not. All that y/n cared about was sleep.

y/n changed into their usual sleepwear and face planted on their bed. After a couple minutes, they realized that they forgot to ACTUALLY fix their bed to go to sleep. They groggily got off the bed and began to look for every single stuffed animal they owned and placed them on the edge of their bed to form a protective barrier to keep them from falling off the bed. Once they finished setting the barrier of stuffed animals they went to sleep. 

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Stephanie sauntered into the Batcave without a care in the world. Inside she found Damian and Cass sparring, Jason cleaning his guns, and Dick, Tim, and Bruce looking at some case files on the Batcomputer. Stephanie smirked and removed her hood and mask as she made her way towards Tim.

"I'm back!" She exclaimed.

"We can see that Brown," Damian said.

Steph rolled her eyes and ignored him.

"Where's y/n?" Bruce asked.

"Oh, about that. They told me to tell you to talk to them in 10 hours or at least after they got some sleep." 

"Did they actually say that?" Dick asked as he looked over his shoulder. By this time, Damian and Cass had stopped sparring and Jason was listening closely to the conversation.

"Yes, but they also called Bruce an emo looking burnt walnut." 

At that comment Jason immediately began to laugh, Dick, Tim, and Cass tried to contain their giggling but Bruce heard them anyway, and Damian, poor Damian was confused. Why would y/n call his father a burnt walnut? What kind of insult is that?

Bruce sighed and looked at his kids. "Fine, we'll go talk to them in the morning, but for now everyone go to bed."

"But we still...." Tim began.

"The case will still be here in the morning Tim." And with that everyone left to their respective homes and rooms. 

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Morning came and the batboys thought it would be better to go get y/n without Bruce. All four boys changed into their suits and left the Manor and Batcave towards y/n apartment.

When the boys arrived they let themselves in through the same window that y/n came in through the night before. Once they entered, they began to explore the assassin's home. Tim raided the kitchen for coffee while the rest looked for the assassin. 

Jason came across a slightly opened door so he slowly opened it just to see the assassin they were looking for surrounded by stuffed animals. He covered his mouth with his hand to muffle the laughter and called the rest of the boys. None of the boys could believe their eyes. In front of them was the world's most heartless assassin in existence surrounded by a variety of adorable and fluffy stuffed animals.

"AWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!" Dick said loudly.

The rest of the boys tried to hush him before they awoke the assassin but they were a tad too late.

"The fuck, THE HELL ARE YOU FUCKITY FUCKERS DOING HERE!" y/n yelled as they threw multiple stuffed animals at the intruders.

The boys ran off laughing as the angry assassin assaulted them with stuffed animals and empty threats

And ever since that day the Batfamily have never stopped teasing the assassin.