be my song // HRVY

cincuenta y siete

"Did you talk it through because of school?",I asked him.
"Blair said that he'll find a solution.I think it would be amazing if I could finish my last year at school with you guys and then start off my career you know?I would obviously already start but I'd concentrate more on school than music because I really want to finish it.",he answered honestly.

"Who would've thought that Harvey Cantwell the badboy in our school is determined to finish this year?", I said jokingly.

"Ha ha you're so funny.",he rolled his eyes pushing me slightly as I chuckled.

"I know I'm hilarious.",I grinned.

"Harvey I need to tell you something.It's really hard for me to open up but I need to tell you this because I feel like I can trust you enough to share my past.I want to tell the others too I feel like I'm finally ready but I want you to be the first one to know about my past I hope that's okay with you.",I told him suddenly very shy.

"Yes of course you know I'm always there for you.You can tell me everything and it means a lot to me that you want to share it with me first.I don't want to pressure you in anything, if you don't want to that's completely fine too-",he babbled but I stopped him smiling lightly.
"Shut up you weirdo and listen.I want to tell you, I am to 100% sure that I trust you with this.", I took a deep breath as Harvey intertwined our hands encouraging me to start.

"So a few years ago people started to bully me in my old school.There were two, a boy and a girl who bullied me most of the time.I never did anything to them I guess they just wanted to bully me because of the fun and hell of it.",I shrugged as I felt his muscles tense.

"I never really knew the reason why it was me but I think it was because I was just dressed ugly and I didn't care about my appearance and that made me a target.Whatever so they bullied me and everyone else started to ignore me because the boy and the girl came up with rumors about me that were never true.I didn't tell my parents because they were busy with work and I didn't want to seem so fragile even though I never stood up for myself which I regret to be honest.They told me that I should just die because I was worthless and stupid and whatnot.I was depressed and bottled everything inside, I was in so much pain and 24/7 anxious.One day there was another girl that never actually bullied me but she didn't talk to me either.She invited me to hang out with her and some friends at the beach.I was happy about the invitation and never thought that anything bad would happen.I made myself pretty that day, I was super nervous because I never hung out with anyone.",I laughed as tears escaped my eyes.

"The girls were so nice to me, we played games in the water and later on I laid down for a bit to dry and tan.I somehow fell asleep which was probably the stupidest thing to do that day...well besides actually going to hang out with them that was an even worse decision.I got thrown into the water, I couldn't breathe and when I struggled to get out someone kept pushing me into the water making me panic.I blacked out and just because of the rescue of a lifeguard I'm still alive.The boy and the girl who bullied me made the girl who invited me act as if she would like to hang out with me so they could do the prank on me.I'm traumatized Harvey.That were probably the worst minutes in my entire life and I will never forget them ever again.The lifeguard called my parents and they were shocked that their little girl got bullied for years and didn't say a word.I didn't speak for weeks because I was so paralyzed and shocked I don't even know what went through my head at that time.That's when my parents decided to move, that's why we're actually here.",I told him as he kept caressing my hand.

"I also changed my name.",I said a little quieter this time, his eyes widened in shock.

"My name was Anastasia but due to the horrific event I convinced my parents to change my name.I searched for a while but Gravity was the one that stuck with me.I think it fits to everything that I went through.",I shrugged.

"I changed completely when we moved here.I promised myself to be much more confident and to not let anybody tell me how to look or be.I was bullied once and I never want to get through it again.I am done with being the fragile one.I changed my style, my hair and my attitude and hanging out with you guys makes me feel alive again after such a long time.I finally feel like myself and I can't thank you enough.",I spoke looking into his wet eyes.
He wiped his eyes with the hem of his shirt and opened his mouth:
"I can't believe you went through so much already.That's why you didn't want to go to swim.You didn't want to face your past again.",he said quietly.

"But I feel like it's easier to face it now with you guys.",I answered truthfully.

"No one should ever go through so much pain like you did but I'm absolutely proud of you.If I ever see those bastards I'm going to kill them-",Harvey started but I interrupted him immediately.

"Don't say that.Please.You are so much better than them.I am so much better than them, we are so much better.",I spoke smiling slightly.

"You're right I'm sorry.But are you okay with the fact that we go to the beach or not?",he asked slowly.

"Not really Harvey.",I said feeling uneasy.

"What if we go to Jamie's and chill?He has a pool, you don't have to go into the water but stay outside.We won't push you into anything I promise.",he said honestly.

"I can try that.But I have to tell them my story first.",he nodded and we went back to Harvey's so he could get his stuff.
Harvey called Jamie and asked him if we could stay at his house and he agreed.

I was nervous to tell them about my past but it felt good to get it off my chest.

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[a/n: I hope you like the chapter💛Please vote and comment down below of you knew that the flashbacks were about her or not🌻]