♪Life Saver♪ {Shawn Mendes}

Chapter 20

(Emily pov)

"And special guest Emily Dallas." Mahogany said and some people cheered not as loud as they did for the rest of the guys.

I walked onstage and stood next to Cam. The guys started to fool around and do what they normally do. I asked Shawn if we could change the song to Counting Stars and he agreed.

Now it was time for me and Shawn to sing.

I swear my stomach did three back flips and turned around.

We introduced ourselves even though I'm pretty sure everyone knew who we were.

Shawn started to strum his guitar. I took a deep breath before we started.

Emily-

Lately I been, I been losing sleep

Dreaming about the things that we could be

But baby, I been, I been prayin' hard

Said no more counting dollars

We'll be counting stars

Yeah, we'll be counting stars

Shawn-

I see this life

Like a swinging vine

Swing my heart across the line

In my face are flashing signs

Seek it out and ye shall find

Old, but I'm not that old

Young, but I'm not that bold

And I don't think the world is sold

I'm just doing what we're told

***

We finished the song and everyone was screaming Shawn's name. He pulled me in for a hug and kissed my lips. I pulled away and smiled at Him.

"I told you, you could do it." He says kissing my forehead

We walked back to the other guys and we decided on a Q&A.

We all sat on the stage and Shawn pulled me onto his lap.

Nash picked a girl with natural red hair kinda like Mahogany's, she had freckles and she was wearing a forever crop top and black high waisted shorts. She was tall and pretty.

"Why is that still trying to get with Shawn?" She asked pointing to me

I spoke to soon.

"Why do you all insist on hating on her?" Cam asked

"She's an ugly ass whore, she's only trying to get into Shawn's pants." A girl called out from the crowd

Just as about Cam was about to say something I stopped him.

"Cam it's fine." I whispered and he gave me the 'are you sure' look, I nodded nodded my head.

"If you don't like me, that's a you problem. I don't care what you have to say about me. I don't need you guys to bring me down when I have these amazing people who are onstage with me that actually care. You don't know me or what I've been through. You know nothing about me or where I come from. All you know is that Cameron is my brother and Shawn is my boyfriend. Everyone on this stage is family to me weather you like it or not." I said and Shawn pulled me closer to him he kissed my cheek and all the guys pulled me in for a hug.

Why did it take me so long to realize I have people right by my side who actually care?

Why do I care what others think of me? All that matters is what me and my family think if me.

I know I don't really like myself but I want to change that.

"Your nothing but a suicidal freak that nobody cares about. Everyone on that stage right now don't care about you they only pity you. Just die already and lets see how much they actually care." I recognized that voice anywhere.

Ryan.

Why the fuck was he here?

He's the only person that knows everything. Ryan, Nash and Jack know where I break. When I can't handle anymore. My problem is all three of us were best friends and they knew a lot of embarrassing things that they ended up using against me to get the whole school to turn on me.

All the guys looked at me and I was almost in tears. I walked away and the guys all called after me.

"Em." That was cam

"Em please stop." Cam said and I just walked faster.

I heard his footstep chasing after me.

I ran back to the hotel and Cam was still behind me. He ended up getting stuck in the crowd if girls in front of the hotel. I ran up to the room and locked myself in the bathroom.

Those words just repeated itself, over and over again.

Suicidal freak.

They only pity you.

Die and see if anyone cares.

Nobody cares about you.

Whore.

Ugly.

Useless.

The voices inside my head kept telling me it was my time to die.

Cut vertical instead of horizontal

Swallow more pills this time

Just find a way to die, it's time to give up the fight. Nobody cares and the all want you gone. Just die already. Do it, Do it now.

"CAN'T YOU SEE I'M TRYING!" I yell

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Cliff hanger.

Maybe I'll update tomorrow. I tend to be very lazy some days and I still have to do my homework.

Have a good day/ night were ever you are.

~Ahrayal Mendes~

BYE ♥♥♥