Sirius Black's Twin

Pointed Fingers

Lyra peeked inside of the Hospital Wing and was surprised to see Estelle snogging Will. She glanced at Nick, who must have woken up at some point and was staring at the ceiling with a horrified expression on his face.

He must have felt Lyra's eyes on him because he glanced over to meet her eyes and mouthed 'help me'. Lyra laughed quietly at the situation her husband was in and shook her hand quietly, pressing her finger to her lips to show that he had to be quiet.

Nick gulped and closed his eyes, obviously hoping to fall asleep and pretend that his son wasn't snogging his girlfriend a few beds down from him.

Lyra rolled her eyes, and couldn't help but wonder how she was acting perfectly normal after an event such as this had only occured a week ago. Maybe she was in shock, maybe the arrival of her husband had made everything okay, maybe everything was okay.

Sirius had always been sad when he was alive, always thinking about James. Maybe dying is what Sirius wanted. Maybe the only reason why he had been fighting to survive was for Lyra;s sake, because he still thought he needed to protect her even after all these years.

He was right.

Everyone needed a hero. And Lyra's hero had been Sirius. But it would be selfish of her to curl up in a ball and cry all day and night, she knew Sirius wouldn't have wanted that, she knew Sirius would have wanted her to live on like every day was her last.

"Why?" someone said from behind her.

Lyra started, but turned to see her daughter standing there. She looked completely miserable, her hair all ratty and her robes put on inside out. She had looked like that for quite a while, and no matter what anyone said she would let the guilt eat her away.

"Why what?" Lyra asked.

"Why were you like that when you were my age?" Lynx demanded. "I tried to let it go, I really did, but now that I see you here at Hogwarts I can actually picture you bullying kids all the time. How many have you put in the hopital wing with inflated heads or bleeding noses? How many times did you put Snape in the Hospital Wing?"

Lyra didn't know how her daughter knew about her childhood years, but she felt emmidiatly on the defense, and she couldn't help but wonder why her daughter was bringing this up, now of all times.

"That was years ago, Lynx," Lyra said sternly. "I was little and troubled. I've changed."

"You were around my age and you had nothing to be troubled about!" Lynx said, her head spinning with rage. "You had your family. You had your mother, your father, your uncle, your brothers. You had everything! I didn't have my father but I never sent anyone to the Hospital Wing!"

Lyra sniffed. She was irritated with her daughter but she wouldn't let it show. She never actually admitted that she used to cry all night from the lack of love when she was small, why would she tell her daughter that? But Lyra had told Lynx some things, but Lynx was scoffing at it like it was nothing. "You had me and you had Will. You had the whole Weasley family to love you. All I ever had was Sirius. And with everyone all happy I used to wonder why everyone could be happy but me. It was stupid, and I realised that."

"Yes, it was completely stupid!" Lynx said. "You are an idiot!"

Lyra brought herself to her full hieight and looked at Lynx with a calm expression. Icey calm. "I was an idiot, Lynx," Lyra corrected. "But it doesn't matter if I was or wasn't because it is not your place to-"

"No," Lynx growled. "You are an idiot. Becuase you know it was wrong yet you never bothered to apologize to anyone."

Lyra glared. "Everyone knows I was sorry. No one wanted an apology."

"Have you ever tired to apologize to Snape?" Lynx demanded.

"No," Lyra sent her daughter a sharp look. "And I never will. It's his fault Will is in the Hospital Wing right now, it's his fault Sirius is dead. All he had to do was tell us that you kids went to the Minstry faster - he was stalling. He wanted something to happen."

"No," Lynx disagreed. "It's your fault Will is scarred and Sirius is dead! I was blaming myself for so long but then I realised - I can't take the blame! I just can't! Because it was you who started all of this!"

Lyra winced. She had blamed herself, but to hear that her daughter was blaming her also was like a stab right in the damaged heart.

"If you haven't been so big-headed and mean to Snape when you were kids then he would have actually cared of what had happened! He wouldn't have stalled! It is all your fault and I hate you!" Lynx screamed.

Lyra face was pained, and she felt like nothing could have had a worst offect on her at the moment. Her husband hardly remembered her, her baby boy was too embarrassed to leave the Hospital, her twin brother was dead, a war is starting, and now her daughter was blaming her for all of that.

But Lyra didn't cry.

No. She was the mother, she wasn't going to let her daughter see her cry. No one deserved to see their mother cry. It was like seeing your whole world crash before your eyes. It meant that there was no hope, no reason to keep fighting.

Lynx had everything to fight for.

Lyra turned away from her daughter, trying to control her expression, but every time she put on a calm mask it would break into the pained one.

Lyra heard her daughter's ragged breath from behind her.

"I - 'm sorry, Mum," Lynx whispered. "I shouldn't have. . . I'm sorry."

Lynx raced away from her mother, wanting to get as far away from her as possible. She had felt a burning hatred towards her mother, and had built up the courage to tell her how she felt. But to see the affect it had on her had torn the hatred away and left Lynx wondering how she could have been so cruel.

She had never seen her mother like that before. Even when she was sobbing on the floor in front of the veil she thought soon her mother would be back to normal.

Then she seen her mother so calm and collected next to her brother's scarred body in the Hospital Wing and Lynx thought that her mother was perfectly fine. It was easy to hate her then.

Now, seeing her mother's calm expression break so easily Lynx couldn't help but wonder if Lyra would ever be fine again. If she could ever face death and laugh in it's face as though it was nothing compared to her.

Lynx never knew until then that her mother had always been a broken girl on the inside, still yearning for love. Lynx now knew that it had always been a mask, and the death of Sirius only made that mask made of glass, easy to shatter.

Lynx's anger evaporated as she ran into her dormitory and screamed into her pillow, ignoring Ginny who was rubbing her back in circles. Lynx was letting the pain of the situation grab hold of her, but she wasn't ready for the pain.

It had come so unexpectedly and Lynx didn't know what to do with it.

"It's okay, Lynx," Ginny murmered. "Everything is going to be fine."

Biggest lie ever.