Chapter 12 - Moment of Gratitude

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Jeongyeon: I get it. And I'm sorry to hear it happened. What do you think you'll be doing now?

Suho:  Oh you know, the usual - watch a sad movie, cry, eat some ice cream, go for a walk and then do it over for a couple of days.

Jeongyeon: Sounds like a valid plan and like something I would do if that sort of thing ever happens to me.

Suho: Oh yeah! I'm sorry, we've been talking about Irene rejecting me for the last half an hour and we haven't even discussed your situation with your band member... So, how have things been going?

Jeongyeon: No need to apologize, heh :) I kinda didn't want to jinx anything by talking about it, because honestly, things are going great! :D :D :D

Suho: So you two are dating? :D :D :D

Jeongyeon: I sad things are going great, not unimaginably amazing :P 

Suho:  Hahahahahha sorry, my bad :'D

Jeongyeon: No, I'm sorry for being a downer... But, thank you for the endless support :)))) Things are doing great as in I'm able to control my thoughts easily... Or at least easier than before. I used to overthink things a lot, but now I don't... As much :D

Suho: Okay, that's good! :D Congrats!

Jeongyeon: Yeah, no, thank you! You gave me great advice on how to handle things.

Suho: Oh? :D

Jeongyeon: Yeah :P You told me that I should just act natural around her, without our usual push and pull... And just... It feels better... If something nice happens and I want to compliment her, I do it. If something funny happens and I want to tease her about it, I do it... Sometimes I feel a sting whenever I go a bit far with a joke... But, it's better than what it was before.... I'M better than before :)

Suho: That's amazing, Jeong! :D :D :D And I'm really glad I could help... And I'm really thankful you're able to share this with me because it's really nice to have someone you can talk to about this type of stuff :)))

Jeongyeon: It is, isn't it? I can't even explain how many times you've helped me, I'm really happy we've opened up to each other :)

Suho: Same, same :D So... Is there a plan for something more or are you content with the way things are now?

Jeongyeon: Honestly, I am kind of content right now, I really am... But sometimes... Sometimes I wish for more... Like, I have a lot going on with her, we do a lot of things together... And I don't mean by work-related things, I mean like, we spend a lot of time outside of work together, just chilling and relaxing... And I don't know, there ARE moments where I want more.

Suho: But you're still afraid it my hurt your life in Twice if you were to confess.

Jeongyeon: Unfortunately, yes... I know it might be even dumb to think about it that way because... Because I think that we would find a way to not make things awkward, but, as you can already tell, I'm starting to overthink things again and I just don't want to do that... And you know how things can get in the public eye - if there's a problem within a group, it gets overanalysed by everyone, and honestly, I'd like my private life to remain private...

Suho: I get ya... Well, is the plan then to be content with things where they are right now?

Jeongyeon: Yeah... Sometimes, when I'm feeling brave, I wish I could get a sign from the universe...

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