Chapter 37

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*Warning: Mention of death*

Henry cupped my face, lifting it up so our eyes would meet.
"Why are you apologizing?" he asked concerned while wiping the tears from my face.
"For being a rude dick to you earlier" I let out a small chuckle.
"It's okay, you're in pain, I understand" he tried to reassure me.
"It still doesn't give me the right to treat you like that." I felt my voice breaking again.
"Just don't worry about it." He planted a soft kiss on my forehead. And that was enough for me to break down again. After the college incident, I had never shown my true feelings in front of anyone but Steph. But right now I felt the weakest I've felt in a long time and being in Henry's embrace I felt safe.

Henry kept rocking me back and forth, rubbing my back and kissing the top of my head.
"Should we start getting back? It's getting kind of dark." He whispered in my ear.
I broke away from his embrace and wiped my tears shifting my gaze from him to the lake "I want to have a swim."
Henry's eyebrows pull together, confusion settling on his features. "You wanna have a swim in the lake?" he asked pointing towards the crystal clear waters.
I gave him a weak smile nodding at him. The cold water would bring me back to my senses and it would help me gather the strength to go back to the studio and confront everyone.
"You know the water must be freezing right?" The concern in his voice was obvious but he couldn't change my mind.
"I'm counting on it" I answered him as I got up and started taking my top and shorts off and I was left with only my black lacey undergarments. I slowly get in the freezing water, shivering at its every touch on my bare skin, but soon after I got used to it and fully dived in.
I emerge from the water and see that Henry is staring at me in awe. "Aren't you gonna join me?" I deadpanned.
Henry let out a small chuckle and obliged to my request by slowly taking off his blue tank top, revealing his hairy chest and well-trained chest. His abs looking like little soft pillows that you couldn't wait to rest your head on. He continued taking his jeans off, letting only his black boxers on and joining me on the lake.
He was quivering and started rubbing his arms trying to get warm "It's cold, how can you handle it?".
I let out a small chuckle and started rubbing his chest and back trying to get him to warm up "you get used to it after a while. It's only bad the first time, after that, you start craving the feeling of the cold water against your skin every time you're away from it".
"Wait, you've done this before?" He exclaimed confused.
I nodded "Mh-hmm, in Iceland at Seljalandsfoss, in Scotland at the fairy pools and in Greece in Fonissa, Lepida, and Nedas."
"Why would you do that to yourself?" he asked sarcastically.
"Helps me to relax and get my mind off things." I admitted letting out a big sigh.
Henry came to hug me again and burying my face on the hollow of his neck. For the first time today, I could finally hear the singing of the birds and the rustling leaves on the light breeze of the evening.

I looked up to him and our gazes locked. I didn't realize when I wrapped my arms around his waist and leaned closer to him. Henry took a strand of my hair and gently played with it before cupping my face, bringing it closer to him. My hand moved to his chest while the other wandered at the back of his neck urging him to kiss me. His eyes searched for my consent before his lips landed on mine in a soft kiss.
I sighed against his lips, giving in to the urge that had been brewing 2 months now.
"I've been waiting for this moment since the first time I saw you." Henry broke off the kiss, but our foreheads were still touching.
"I've been waiting for this for a long time as well." I planted a small peck on his lips "but can we take this slow? I'm feeling like shit right now."
He nodded and brought me back in his embrace "We'll take this as slow as you need."

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Henry and I dried ourselves and got back to the studio.
Anya and Freya run towards me, embracing in a tight hug.
"We heard the news, we are so sorry." Anya whispered to me while still not breaking the hug.
Freya cupped my elbows seeming concerned "how are you feeling?".
I shrugged my shoulders at her, not knowing what to answer. I cried so much that I couldn't cry anymore, my tears were dry. I was numb and the realization hit me. Everyone I love will one day leave me. Anya snapped me off my thoughts as she slapped Freya's head "how do you think she's feeling? Her best friend just died".
It felt like someone pierced a dagger through my heart and started twisting it. It was the first someone mentioned out loud that she was dead. I covered my mouth trying to hide my whimper and started running towards my trailer. I could hear the muffled attempts of Anya, Freya, and Henry to call me but didn't answer them. I rushed to my trailer locking it behind me, resting my back on the door I slowly collapse to the floor crying. Despite my blurry vision I manage to notice the bracelet I was wearing. It was all white marble-like beads with just one black bead in the middle. Steph had the same, only it was all black with a white in the middle. She said that they were supposed to be long-distance friendship bracelets. That every time we missed each other we would just look at the bracelet and remember our good times together.
I could hear banging on the door and Anya's pleas for me to open it, I barely distinguished Henry's soft voice telling her to leave me alone and that I needed my time. I couldn't be more grateful.

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It was Friday, about a week and a half had passed since the crash and Martha let me know that the funeral would be on Sunday, so I was getting my suitcase ready and me and Henry would be driving me to the airport in about an hour.
I assured them that I would be fine on my own but neither Lauren or Henry believed me. So Lauren basically demanded that Henry should come with me and we should come back on Wednesday, 3 days after the funeral. I tried to change her mind, but she was just as stubborn as me and couldn't convince her.

Anya and Freya hugged me goodbye and with that, we left.
The journey to the airport was small and silent, I was fidgeting with my fingers.

I wasn't ready for this.
I wasn't ready to say goodbye to my best friend forever.

I wouldn't even be able to see her.
They would be burying an empty coffin.
But I guess that's for the better.

Henry snapped me off my thoughts, letting me know that we reached the airport. He paid for the car at the airport parking and we headed for the check-in. We both gave our passports and tickets and walked through the gate, leading to the airplane.
We got on deck, finding our seats, and Henry took my suitcase putting on the bagging space above our heads. I sat down buckling my belt and Henry followed soon after. His fingers caressed mine as he intertwined our hands together, giving me small reassuring squeezes throughout the flight.
I rested my head on his shoulder and he flung his arm around me, bringing me closer to him and giving me a small kiss on the temple.

"Thank you for letting me be there for you when you need me." he whispered.

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