Why? ~Jaden Hossler~

Chapter 45

"About... I don't know, really", Bryce said looking down, "but I'll say a lot." I looked down at Jaden who was still asleep. I don't know how to feel about this. It's a lot and I never thought he would do drugs. There should be a good reason why he started using it. "Why would you give him anything?", I asked looking at Bryce. "It just happened, and I told him I'm not getting him anything anymore. That's why he was on edge earlier", Bryce said not looking at me. "I know how much you hate drugs, I'm sorry", he said. "It's... fine. Jae should've said no or just talk to me", I said smiling slightly at him. "Why do you hate it?", Bryce asked sitting down on the edge of the bed. He almost fell, not forgetting he is still tipsy. "What? Drugs?", I asked. He nodded and I explained. "Before my dad and I left Amsterdam, he started to use drugs and smoke weed. He always thought I didn't know, but I did. One of his exes told a lie about him and he got bad press. His career was going down and he went down with it", I said. "One night, he came home drunk and he smelled like weed. My aunt wasn't home, and I woke up from him falling to the ground. The next day he was throwing up, and he told me later that he almost overdosed", I said tearing up. "He didn't wanted to live anymore. Everyone was hating on him and sending him death threats. He said that he didn't do it because he thought about me not having any parents", I said letting the tears fall down my cheek. "I'm scared that it will happen to me too", I said looking down. "You won't, and if something happens we will be with you thru it", Bryce said grabbing my hand. I smiled at him and he asked, "what did that ex say about you dad?" "She said that my dad raped her or something, but it couldn't be. Because I was home the night she said it happened, so that was stupid", I said chuckling. Bryce laughed and stood up. "I'm going to sleep", he said walking to the door. "Thanks, and I'm not mad at you", I said knowing he felt guilty. "That means a lot, Kate", he said smiling and closing the door.

I fully laid down next to Jaden and moved the hair out of his face. He woke up and pulled me close to him. I just studied his face and was questioning myself. Why wouldn't he talk to me about this? Why was he not telling me how he felt? Maybe I missed something. "What you thinkinggg?", he said still slurring his words. "Nothing", I said still looking serious. "Are you mmmad at me?", he asked pouting. "No Jae", I said smiling at him. "Do you love me?", he asked pulling me close and cuddling my chest. "Yes, I love you", I said chuckling. "Hmm", he mumbled. I wrapped my arms around his neck and tried to sleep. Jaden was snoring a little bit, but it was cute. After an hour I fell asleep too.

~ Jaden's POV ~
I woke up with the biggest headache ever. I guess last night was a rough night. I can't really remember anything. I put my head back on the pillow as the sun was shining right in my face. It didn't smell like my room. I looked up and looked around. Oh, I'm in Kate's room. Wait. Did I tell her last night? Maybe she doesn't know.As I was thinking I hear the bathroom door open. I looked at her and without knowing I was staring. She is gorgeous. "Good morning", she said sitting next to me. "Hi", I said smiling at her. "How are you feeling?", she asked smiling. "Like shit", I said putting my head back on the pillow. "Like you should", she said chuckling. I pulled her on to the bed and start tickling her. "Jaeeee", she said laughing. Her laugh is beautiful. After a few minutes I stopped, and we laid next to each other. She smiled at me as she was catching her breath. "Did something happen last night", I asked wrapping my arms around her waist. "We showered together", she said smiling. "Ohh", I said raising my eyebrows. "Nothing happened, creep", she said hitting my shoulder. "But you were asleep in seconds", she said chuckling. "Hmm, did I say something embarrassing", I asked blushing. Does she know? Did I tell her last night? "You asked if I was mad, and I said no. And then you asked, 'do you love me' and I said yes", she said smiling at me. That's not too bad. I smiled at her and kissed her lips. I laid down and just looked at her.

"I know, Jae", she said not looking at me. What? Did she mean... I just looked at her and she looked up at me, but this time she had tears in her eyes. I couldn't say anything. "Why didn't you tell me?", she asked looking at me. "I know how much you hate it, a-and I didn't mean for it to get like this", I said stuttering. It went silent as she pulled me in for a hug. It surprised me, but I hugged her back. We pulled away and she sat up. "I'm not going to say that you should stop or anything, because it's your life... But please", she said already tearing up. "B-be careful. I-I can't bare losing you too," she said looking down at her hands. I sat up too and grabbed her hands. "I-I want you to know I'm here if you need me. Please talk to me", she said looking up and the tears were streaming down her face. "I'm sorry", is the only thing I manage to get out. "I know it's not an excuse, but I didn't feel good when I first took it", I said looking down. "Why did you?", she asked. I looked up at her and sighed. "I didn't wanted to feel anything anymore", I said tearing up. I still felt guilty for saying those things I said to her and the way Mads treated her that night, or every time she said something about Kate. I feel like I don't deserve her, I know I don't. She is a genuine person and I'm just a messed up kid. "What didn't you wanted to feel?", she asked. "I-I", I started. I couldn't hold it anymore. I started to cry, and I never cry like this. Kate wrapped her arms around me, and I cried on her shoulder. "You don't need to tell me", she whispered as she moved her hands thru my hair. I don't deserve her. No one does.

~ Back to Kate's POV ~
After twenty minutes Jaden calmed down and we went downstairs to be with the boys. I do want to know how he is feeling and why, but I didn't want push him. Everyone was in the living room and we were just talking with each other. It was already 3 pm, but everyone was recovering from their hangover. "Kate?", Payton asked. I looked at him and nodded. "I'm leaving to go to the studio in thirty minutes, do you wanna come?", he asked smiling. "Yeah, I'm gonna change", I said standing up. I turned around and looked at Jaden. I grabbed his hand and pulled him up. He walked behind me and followed me upstairs. He haven't said anything since we left my room a few hours ago. We walked in and he sat on my bed. I walked to my closet and grabbed some jeans and a hoodie. I changed in front of him, since it's not the first time. I put the half of my hair up and walked up to him. He looked up at me and he had tears in his eyes. I really didn't wanted to leave him like this. I pulled him in for a hug. I was still standing, so he had his head on my stomach. "Jae, I can stay here", I said moving my hand in his hair. "N-no, I'll be fine", he said pulling away. I moved my head to the side knowing he wasn't good. "No, please go", he said wiping his tears and giving me a little smile. I bend down and kissed him. "Just call me if you need anything", I said rubbing my thumb on his cheek. He nodded and looked down. "I love you", I said moving his head up. He gave me a weak smile and kissed my forehead. Why didn't he say it back? "Kate, are you ready?", Payton asked standing in the doorframe. I looked at Jaden and then at Payton. "Uh, yeah. Let's go", I said standing up. I gave Jaden a hug and walked downstairs with Payton. "What happened?", Payton asked. "In the car", I said not wanting to talk about it in the house. 

We got into my car and I started to drive to the studio. "What happened?", Payton asked again. "Jae is not really... himself. And I said, 'I love you', but he didn't say it back. He normally does", I said trying to focus on the road. "Don't worry, he loves you. He is just figuring his stuff out", he said. "I'm scared, Payt", I said looking at him for a second. "Of what?", he asked. "That he is gonna do something... stupid. I can't lose him", I said tearing up. I'm genuinely scared. "Hey, he is gonna open up about what he is going thru. And you won't lose him, we are all here for him", he said grabbing my hand. I looked at him and smiled weakly.

~ Payton's POV ~
It hurts me to see both of my best friends being hurt like this. Jaden told me about the drugs and what he has been feeling the past weeks. I get where he is coming from, but he needs to talk to Kate. It's breaking the both of them and I don't want them to fight or break up because of this. I told Jaden he needs to tell her how he feels and not trying to ignore it by taking drugs. But it's not easy for him, especially towards Kate. He says he doesn't want her to feel guilty and we all know she would. We arrived at the studio and I showed Kate around. I could see her eyes light up being here. She always says she doesn't want to start doing music, but I can tell she loves it.

"Okay, so here we record the vocals, and you know try stuff", I said walking into the recording booth. "This is sick, Payt", she said walking around. "Try something", I said walking to the other side of the screen. "No, I shouldn't touch anything", she said. "It's fine. Just take the headphone and tell me what you want to sing", I said smiling at her. "Fine", she said picking up the headphones and putting them on. "Uhmm okay. Do you have 'Who you are' by Jessie J?", she asked. I nodded and found the song. After the intro from the song she started to sing. Her voice is beautiful, even tho she doesn't want to admit it. In the middle of my song my producer walked in. I told him to be quite and he sat down. I guess Kate didn't notice because she kept going. "She is really good", Hiser said (my producer). I nodded and said, "maybe she can sing on the song we've been working on?" "That would sound amazing", he said nodding. The song came to an end and Kate looked at me. Then she noticed Hiser and she looked shocked. She took the headphones of and walked to the room we were in. "Hai, I'm Hiser, Payton's producer", Hiser said shaking her hand. "Hi, I'm Kate", she said smiling. "I've heard a lot of good things about you. Your voice is amazing", he said. "Thank you", Kate said shyly. "Payton and I have been talking, and maybe", he stared looking at me. "You can feature on my next song", I finished smiling. "Uhm...", she started. I hope she says yes. Please say yes!

A/N
I know, a lot of different POV
I hope you like this chapter! I have to say that the story is coming to an end. Not now but soon :( If you have any suggestions or things you want to happen let me know!

This chapter is inspired by @SwayLA_HypeHouse_ <3

See you soon! I luv all of you <333