||~~The Brewer's Girl~~||

👼Mask👼

☺Chapter - 7☺

❤Dedicated to kkaps_
for pushing me to write further❤

❤Mask❤

Aashna.

My head feels the dizziness still as I follow Kabir into the night that is chill enough for summer. He was right, I did throw up as soon as he stopped the bike on reaching our destination. So now walking alongside the river Liffey on Westmoreland street, the fresh breezes clear my mind. The smell from the river is bringing back the nostalgic memories of us being at the same place when we were together. It is still so special. All the lights that sparkle in the reflection on the water and Kabir's presence beside me sends me back to the day he had given me all of his heart.

I remember how I had felt that overwhelming desire to leap up, throw my arms around him, kiss him on the lips and let the tears flow. Never before had I felt such happiness. I could feel my heart opening, as if for the first time. How was it that a person could bring such happiness to another without really trying much to do anything at all. A friendly greeting, an innocent smile- I still remember so clearly- and at that moment I wanted nothing else. I was the richest woman in the world. Our time used to be so perfect, all we needed was each other and nothing more.

But our happiness was short lived- for the greatest betrayal, the greatest sin I could have ever committed against the most blameless, was to abandon a loving heart, and for that I shall never be forgiven. Most times I fought the memories. But sometimes, sometimes I let myself drown in them.

In that excruciatingly long time after I left Kabir, I struggled so hard not to call or text him. Barely controlled myself from flying to his place, knocking on his door, telling him I was lying and all I needed him was him and nobody else. I wanted to beg him to take me back just like he had come that rainy night. Over time it had gotten a little easier when he flew back to Ireland and the news of his engagement with Aarohi was all around. Eventually I learned to cope with my pain and not think about him all the fudging time.

But everything was a delusion. Now I realize, it was the distance that had made me think I was doing better. Because now that he is so close, the urge to declare my love for him has resurfaced.

Suddenly he turns around to face me and I stumble in my steps, my heart giving a jerk and I can see two of him, blurring in the foreground of the city lights behind him.

"More water?"

"Thanks." I allow and take the bottle from his hand and drink from it. Tonight I can't afford to be vulnerable. I know he will try to take advantage of it and make me admit something I don't want to, to drive me out of his life. He starts walking again and I follow, swooshing the empty bottle in the air but the movement only makes me fuzzier so I toss it into the street dustbin as we take a turn to climb the O'Connell bridge. Who knows how many love stories have started here and this great iron monument is the witness of it all like ours. I can't keep my thoughts from skittering away every few seconds so I blink in alertness when Kabir turns around again, but this time there is hostility radiating from his whole body posture.

"It was real for me. I don't know what it was for you but it was real for me and I wanted to spend forever with you, my every breath with you. I wasn't lying when I proposed to you right there!" He bursts out, pointing in the middle of the river. I'm stunned to hear these words from him and I force myself to follow the direction where he is looking now. There are no boats tonight but there had been, more than five years ago when we were wrapped in our own world Kayaking under the very same canal. He had been so tender to me that night, the night I realized I was falling for him more and more. Even now I can't stop falling for him whereas he is colder than ever. Gone is the Promise of forever between us.