||~~The Brewer's Girl~~||

👼Lie👼

☺ Chapter - 14 ☺

Dedicated to MayurChan and daydreamerr17 Happy birthday guys!! ❤❤ thanks for your friendship and support ❤

❤Lie❤

Kabir

"Mai itni buri hu kya? Am I that bad?" Aashna asks with her eyes glistening with tears of brokenness. I've just told her I regretted kissing her because that was harsh of me and I'm guilty and apologizing but I don't want her to feel like that about herself.

"No Aashna, you're not bad," I mutter and then sigh as her eyes grow more helpless and furious. "Being a good person and being a good person in a relationship are two different things." I continue to make her understand, "I just feel bad because kissing you wasn't a way to deal with it."

She presses her eyes and tears slip by as she whispers a cry, "Why was it not Kabir? You took it out on me and if you have to do it this way, please do but fight with me." She breathes and I can't believe she is offering this! I am beyond shocked, not understanding what is so wrong with her that she just can't process my denials.

"It's like you've built such high walls around you, you're so guarded I can't reach you." She strikes me with her accusing eyes and it's ridiculous to me.

"You must be blind to not see it! Here I am expressing time and again that I have moved on and I am guarded? I think the only thing limiting yourself is you Aashna. You have all this pent up and self thought angst inside you that you don't let on and my walls are high?" I scoff and rest both my elbows on the knees as I widen them to get more space and breathe calmly.

"The question is do you want to climb these walls that I have?" She asks, her voice sounding hopeful but I am not looking at her now. I'm gazing in the dark bushes under the cover of night sky. I take a moment to speak and then I decide to let her spill so that she can let go of this heaviness or whatever it is she feels and leave me alone with all this obsession.

"Honestly I wanted to once. I had come to you to climb these walls when you were in my life. But you ended all of it yourself. Your choice." I shrug, shaking my head in sarcasm.

"You not only came back but also decided to stay aspiring to be a part of my life again. Your choice!" I shake my head at how unbelievably plausible this is and then stare back at her. "Why are you the one who always gets to decide huh?"

"So you want to fight but you won't because you want to take charge?" She is frowning but I can see the dread on her face. She seems like I'm going to throw a bomb at her and it's the most extreme emotion I have ever seen. I decide it's my chance to make her see the sense in life and to make believe that it is time she gives up on me and leaves.

"The reason I am not fighting anymore is because I am tired of fighting. In fact I was tired long back and now there is nothing left to fight for. Look I had already told you my feelings then, explained to you my current feelings and I just don't have the energy anymore okay. My silence means I am in a self healing process and I have forgotten everything I have ever wanted from you." The only thing I want from her now is to leave but the way she is on the verge of breakdown again, I keep that much away for now. I am seriously done seeing her cry and beg like this so it's better to make her talk. "It's over Aashna and it was when you put a fullstop. So why do you expect me to come back? What changed?"

All hell has broken loose and she is whimpering now and I'm sympathetic towards her but I just sit there and let her cry because I feel like maybe she needs it. I have finally let the 'why' place it out there. It's a question that I thought about several times. If she didn't want me then, why would she want me like this now? What is the reason?