confusifying | wicked | book 3/3

Nessa

I'm exited to surprise my sister with a visit.
I've realised that I've been being to harsh on her, I'm only here for the day but I feel that it will be nice for her.
Besides, I do miss her.
Glinda has told me that's she's reading in one of the spare rooms.
Boc decided to accompany me down the hallway to go and see her, something that I'd usually complain about, but I've decided to try and be more optimistic about everything.

"I'm going to have to stay up later and read through all my reports that I've missed," I mutter as we stroll down the hallway.
Boc laughs merrily.
"Do you ever stop thinking of work?" He smiles,
I stop in my tracks, shaking my head playfully.
"No,"
Boc shrugs and continues walking, i follows behind.
"Though your dedication is admirable." Boc cheers as we stop in front of the room that my sisters in.
I don't want to knock, I just want to go in and surprise her.
Slowly Boc opens the door for me.

The room is pitch black, a thin beam of light creeps in through the doorway and stretches across the room.
Suddenly my eyes are drawn to the middle of the room.
A lit candle, a ghostly figure above it.
A figure that I recognise instantly.
My father.
He turns his head, a look of shock and guilt strewn about his face.
"Nessarose!" He cries, reaching out towards me.
Suddenly he dissapears, the candle blows out.
The room encapsulated with darkness.

I scream.
Frantically I push myself backwards until I hit a wall.
Boc and Elphaba come rushing towards me.
I don't know where to go, if I go forwards it's towards my sister and boc, there is no backwards anymore.
"Nessa!" Elphaba cries.
I shake my head violently.
I push myself forward and turn around, racing down the hallway and into the lounge.
Surprisingly no ones there.
Boc catches up with me before Elphaba does.
"Nessa," he pants, he doubles over and places his hands on his thighs.
Boc catches is breath for a moment.
"Who was that?"
I look about myself, everything seems wrong.
I don't want to be in this house anymore.
"My... my father!" I splutter shakily.
Boc looks terrified and looks just over my head, at the hallway behind me.
I hear Elphabas frantic footsteps approach me.
I seize the wheels on my chair and spin myself around.
"You!" I cry "that's why you came to Shiz yesterday, you didn't want photos, you stole from me!"
I million thoughts are racing through my head.

"Nessarose it's not like that," Elphaba rambles.
Boc comes and stands beside me, he places his hand on my arm rest.
I scramble around and grab his hand in mine.
He gives my hand a reassuring squeeze.
"Give me back my book." I demand.
I hear scampering foot steps, Glinda rushes in suddenly.
"Everything okay?" She asks, her eyes flickering nervously to each occupant of the room.
Elphaba takes a step towards the doorway.
"Is Melena upstairs?" I snap, loathing the thought of calling her my mother.
"Your mother? Yes." Glinda replies shocked at my tone.

I have to stay angry to keep myself from crying.
But I fail, tears pour down my checks and Elphaba and Glinda rush forward, I take my hand out of Bocs to wipe my eyes, to no avail as more tears take there place.
"Nessa..." Elphaba mumbles sorrowfully.
"Give me back my book." I demand once more, gasping for air in between sobs.
Glinda places a comforting hand on my back and Elphaba rushes out of the room.
"What happened?" Glinda cries "what did she do?"
I shake my head and scrub ferociously at my eyes.
"Nessa, please talk to me." Glinda pleads.
"I'm going home," I turn to Boc "if you want to stay here a while, I Understand."
Boc looks shocked at the notion.
"Nessa you need someone with you." Boc says sternly.
I know what he means, I want to be isolated from everyone but at the same time, just cry into someone's arms.

After a while, Elphaba rushes back into the room, The Halen in her hands.
She places it onto my lap.
I glare at her, she stares back sympathetically.
I begin to cry again.
"I can't believe you." I sob, Glinda steps back , "How could you do this?"
Elphaba just stares at me, I can tell that she wants to run over and be with me but I don't want to see her.
I throw open the Halen, and find the transportation spell.
The book on my lap, I take Bocs hand with one arm and clutch at my chair with the other, to assure that it travels with me.
I recite the spell.

I'm back in my office, I'm practically shaking with rage, I carefully place the Halen onto my desk, then with an flurry of anger, I swipe my hand across the desk and send a pot of pens clattering to the floor.
"Nessa!" Boc cries.
"I'm sorry." I start to cry again. "I need to go to bed."
I lay my head in my hands and Boc pushes me into my bedroom.
Gently, Boc lifts me into bed, I don't have time to put on the right garments for sleeping.
I just want to lay down and relax my posture.
As much as I'd like to just clear my mind, it's too foggy to clear anything.
"Do you want to talk about it?" Boc asks calmly.
"Boc if you wouldn't mind, can you just leave me be, I don't want to shout at anymore people."
Boc nods and slowly leaves the room.

I didn't even get to speak to him, that was my father, I hate to say this but I miss him.
I don't know how I'm going to be able to look my mother in the eyes again.
How I'll ever speak to Albert.
And Elphaba, I don't know if it's worth trying to contact her for a while.
My father did so many things wrong but he always looked out for me, he miss treated my sister but she always had my best interests at heart.

I wish she'd never spoken to him.