confusifying | wicked | book 3/3

Nessa

"Oh Nessa." My mother splutters, Boc smiles sympathetically towards me as I continue to be sighed at by my mother.
"Your sister said that your heart stopped again, without warning, oh Nessa my baby girl!" Mother cries.
I can't take much more crying, I just feel so guilty for something that isn't my fault in the slightest, as bad as it sounds, I wish my sister hadn't saved me.
"How are you feeling my angel?" Mother asks me delicately.
"I'm sure she's exhausted and needs some sleep," Boc reply's, stealing the words from within my mouth.
"Are you feeling alright Nessarose?" Mother queries hesitantly.
My sister steps forward and puts her hand on our mothers shoulder.
"Mother stop with all the questions, I'm sure Nessa is just a bit drowsy." My sister hisses under her breath.

I turn my head slightly to look at Boc, who hasn't taken his eyes off of me.
"Nessa do you need me to close the blinds?" Boc asks gently.
I spy my chair from across the room, it's regal, red velvet cushioning and polished golden frame standing out to me and drilling the image into my mind.
Oh, how I long to be out of this bed.
"Boc will you bring me my chair?" Ive asked a question but I'm hoping it will be taken as a command, an instruction, an order.
All eyes fall on me, until finally someone speaks.
"It's not what's best" I hear someone mumble.
"Nessa," Boc says, finally I'm being addressed "wouldn't you rather stay in bed, just for today?"
I shake my head, widen my eyes and probably look practically disgusted.
"No, no I wouldn't." I snap "I don't want to be here anymore!"

I'm feeling an immense amount of anger, in just so angry, so sad, so confused that I can feel it growing inside of me.
"Nessarose please don't speak to your lovely Boc like he's only trying to help," I know it's my mother by her Incessant use of my full name.
"Melena it's fine," Boc reply's swiftly "Nessas upset, it's okay."
"Twelve weeks!" I cry.
My sister dashes forward.
"Please calm down," she whispers "you must heed what Dr Tip said."
I take no notice of my sister ramblings, I can't, I'm just so angry.
"Twelve weeks I stayed rotting away in bed!" I sob "and now you expect me to stay in bed again. No, this isn't who I am!"
I hear the sound of the floorboards creaking as my mother slowly approaches me, she brings her hands to my cheek and carefully wipes my tears.
But I'm not an infant and won't be treated like one.
"Don't touch me!" I scream, a surge of my emotions tearing through the room.
Mother is throws backwards into my chair, the door slams and the curtains shake as if blown by a great wind, objects tumble off of tables and scatter to the floor.
All this happened in an instant and in an instant it has ceased.
Mother looks horrified to be sat in my chair and stand up almost instantaneously.
"Nessa?" She questions uneasily "what just happened?"
I glare, terrified, at my sister, who's eyes are starring sorrowfully at me.
"Mother get out." I mumble defeatedly, I'm exhausted and despite my recent protests to leave this bed, all I want now if to fall asleep on it.
Mother takes a step towards me, a gentle smile on her face.
"No mother, please leave."
Boc takes her by the arm and the two of them clamber over the rubble of the room to leave.
The door creaks loudly as it's open again, my sister turns to me.
She throws herself over the bed and hugs me tightly.
"I'm so sorry." She cries.
"Get off me,sister!" I bark, she does as she's told. "What did you do to me?" I cry loudly.
My sister clings at my hands, she's shaking terribly.
"I brought you back to life, I couldn't let you go!" She sobs "I think a part of my powers have gone into you."
"Take them back!" I exclaim hurriedly "I don't want them, not like this."
Elphie shakes her head sadly, she leans her head to one side.
"I'm so sorry sister."
I look around the room at the mess I've caused.
"Please." I whisper pitifully "just let me out of bed."

My sister shakes her head and clenches her fists.
"Not yet Nessarose." She mutters sadly.
I feel that same anger build up again.
"I won't let you leave me to rot here!" I sob, the door slams shut again and the room becomes much colder, the light in the ceiling flickers for a few seconds.
My sister runs forward and hugs me tightly, I writhe as best as I can to get out of her grip.
I won't have her treat me like a child.
"Elphaba get off of me." I bark, my sister reluctantly does as she's told.
"I'm sorry Nessa" she says shakily.
Coldly, I glare at my sister, I see her shudder slightly as she bends down to place whatever I've knocked off of the dressing tables back onto them.
After she has cleared the floor completely, my sister retreats back into the chair across from my bed.
"I don't want to sit here anymore" I mutter, my voice trembling violently. "If I'm to stay in bed then I regret you bringing me back to life."
My sister starts to cry.
"How can you say that!" She sobs.
"It's true, this isn't a life Elphaba. I'm not a child and you don't get to treat me as such." I bark, my sister nods and looks sadly towards my chair.
"Elphaba you have to let me make my own mistakes, if something happens whilst I'm out of bed it's not your fault."
My sister nods slowly, stepping towards my chair.
"I can't apologise to you anymore, because I'm not sorry, I don't regret bringing you back to life at all."
Though my sister has always been the same.
She'd rather me be miserable than dead.