The Trials and Tribulations of a so-called Trouble Teen

Chapter 50 - Half as Much

Having had the opportunities to perform the last 2 nights, I'm sitting here thinking about the next opportunities I could possibly be getting. I have to ease the transition into mainstream media first before I really jump into anything. Last night, I fantasised about hosting my own full-scale talk show as I fell asleep - Castillo's Corner. Musical performances, guests, audience participation, it would be amazing! Getting a radio show too would mean the opportunity for cross platform promotion. Christ, my fantasising is getting out of hand. I'm just wanting an escape at the end of the day. I have so much free time to myself now that I need to find something to do.

I can do the world a gooden, but I haven't a baldy notion about what I could do. There are moments where I have an idea but shoot it down because of the implication it will have. Why can't the world just be a better place? What can I do about it exactly? Kinda wanna become a billionaire only to then spend it all on fixing the problems of the world. I can't believe I'm lamenting over not being well off enough, that is not a good sign... What sort of implications am I setting myself up with this mindset? Probably thinking more selfishly and as result becoming someone snooty. Yuck, that's everything I hated about Priscilla. I can't become like her, I just can't.

At least we're at home now. I have my own bed to sleep in and all my equipment at reach. I have access to my radios, the full collection. Most of all, the best part about coming home, no matter where you're coming from, is the wifi connecting immediately. You don't have to share those cursed hotel speeds at home. Gosh, I am talking so much privilege right now. There's people living in hotels full time with no choice. Some don't even have a roof over their heads. There is far too much inequality in this country and it's good for no one.

If there's one thing I always notice while exploring any city, it's the homeless numbers. If I see one person sleeping rough, or if I see 65, that's still one too many. No one should be sleeping rough. "Anti-homeless" tactics that work to harm rough sleepers rather than help them need to go. More needs to be done to bring the number to zero. There are numerous charities out there dedicated to helping rough sleepers. They're just not getting enough support. A government that has claimed to help rough sleepers has just worked against them and so many others they promised to help.

I like to think of myself as a conscious citizen. Someone who contributes to their local community, invests their time in relief efforts, cares for the local environment and makes decisions based on benefiting their surroundings. I moved to this country, so it's only right for me to become involved in the local area and actually contribute like those born here do. In a positive way, of course. Yeah, the school things I dealt with weren't my strongest moments, but I want to think that I'm still being positive in my impact in other ways.

//

E: [sitting on roof tuning radio]

M: [walks upstairs] Evin, [comes onto roof] your juice.

E: [focused on finding station information]

M: [sitting down] Earth to Evin!

E: [looks up]

M: What are you-

E: KBS World Service. Playing a Mamamoo song.  Broadcasting from Woofferton in French.

M: How do you know... what?

E: I was also getting a signal from Iran but lost it pretty much as soon as I worked it out.

M: [looking at time] We should probably get something for lunch, do you wanna go out?

E: [thinking] Sure, I guess.

M: Where could we go?

E: Pret?

M: You're just like your father aren't you?