My Life Is Held Together With Pink Leopard Print Duck Tape

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"Guyys, Giorno said we should switch out a bit." Narancia kicked off a leaf that caught onto his black pants, gun hanging idly on his arm. Fugo dragged behind a tad, making sure no one was following them. "I think the other team is picking up on our defensive strategy, so Giogio said that they would have a harder time finding (Y/N) if we keep trading places."

"They're professional hitmen, so I kind of doubt it'll do a lot." Fugo mumbled, knocking against the wooden platform to alert their friends of the shift in their plans. Rising from the cozy dirt nest they had accustomed to, Bruno and Abbacchio checked their surroundings one last time. Fortunately, there didn't seem to be any disturbances in their half of the foliage.

"Giorno isn't our boss here, why did you even listen to him?" Abba was the first to voice his complaints. Sure, he didn't want to sit on the ground for however long this game would drag on, but did he want to move around either? No. Of course not. Why did he even come here, again?

"So... you guys are just gonna leave me up here?" (Y/N) waved at the group below her, swaying her legs from the limb she sat on. Sure, she could jump down, but there's just something so satisfying from being taller than everyone else. "Well, that's fine I guess. No one is gonna shoot me 'accidently'."

"I said I was sorry!" The ravenette whined, wilting in his spot as Fugo visibly rolled his eyes. Despite the distance, it was so exaggerated that even (Y/N) could see it. Was that on purpose? "Anyway, we're your bodyguards now! Trust us!"

"Alright, we'll join Giorno up front, we'll signal you if we need any help." Bruno brushed off the dust from his sleeves. Joined with Abbacchio, the two trudged through the brush to go stir up the drama. Left behind, the stupid trio of children began to delve into their dumb antics to help time pass.

"You know what this is like? Rapunzel!" Narancia recounted, leaning against the base of the tree and looking up at the girl above him. Then, like the true dramatic bitch he is, with a twirl, a dip, and a bow, he reached up towards her with the most knightly voice he could muster. "Rapunzel Rapunzel! Let down your hair!"

"Oh yea, but wouldn't that make Bruno the mean ol witch who put me up here?" (Y/N)'s hair wasn't nearly long enough to pull off such a feat, and even if she did, she's one hundred percent certain it would get tangled beyond comprehension if she tried to do something like that. "Bruno's not mean, although I don't know why I had to be up here."

"Probably to help hide you?" Fugo shrugged, keeping his eyes set in the direction enemies would come. The lack of movement decided that for now, they were safe and he could just have fun with the rest of them. "Besides, Rapunzel was in a tower. This isn't even a treehouse, it's literally just a tree."

"Then what's she like, huh?" (Y/N) most certainly fit that 'not quite a princess' vibe, after all. And Narcy had a 'not quite a prince' vibe, maybe? So this was certainly a fitting fairytale. What was Fugo, the loyal steed?

"(Y/N) is (Y/N), she's simply herself," the blond glanced at the roots of the tree, suddenly feeling a little shy. No princess could be as wild as her, and no warrior could be as forgiving and caring as her. There really wasn't anything quite like the entity they called (Y/N), it felt wrong to place her under any sort of title when she was simply his friend.

"Hm yes those are both compelling answers, but so high up, I am... a Tyrant! A true ruler who crushes rebellion under my heel and thrives on the throne above everyone else-" the silhouette of an arm shot out and hooked her waist, dragging her into the very large body of someone behind her. A gunshot rang, the receiver of the paint pellet bled purple, and with that, (Y/N) was whisked away.

The shock of it all sent Fugo spiralling for answers. What just happened? Who just shot Narancia? "Hey, was that the enemy? Why weren't you using your stand, Narancia?!"

"We could use our stands?!" He gaped, holding his abdomen where the paint splatter had hit. "Why didn't anyone tell me?!"

"They literally said so at the beginning of the game! You know what, no, it's already too late, go join Trish or something." Fugo groaned, shooing the dead man towards the exit and hurrying to go tell his group the unfortunate news. They'll have to devise another plan to go fetch the flag.

Their beloved flag, however, was already across the map and safely in the territory of the assassins, kudos to Risotto and his stand metalica. She almost forgot that his stand allowed him to act invisible. She still doesn't exactly understand how exactly that works though. "You found me pretty fast. I thought it would be harder to search the entire area."

"No, I just used the magnetic properties of my stand to locate the areas where there were the most people." Work smarter, not harder, children. "And now, you are going to stay in our territory. No moving or you get the spray bottle."

She shivered at the memories. To train her to be as silent as a fox, they would spritz her with the spray bottle whenever she made a noise or disturbed them. To be honest, she's pretty sure it was just a method to validate her torture, but no matter. It worked. "But I won't make any noise so it's okay."

"I'll make Ghiacchio trap you in ice again." They won't encase her in it, but it wasn't impossible to trap her inside a small, slippery dome to prevent her from skittering away or something. "No moving."

"You're mean." With a light huff, (Y/N) crossed her arms and looked around, finally noticing Melone chilling behind one of the many tree trunks. "Oh sup, what are you doing all the way back here?"

"No one is letting me use them for my babyface, and I'm not going out there and putting myself on the line." He grumbled. His stance in his team was purely frontlines, but it was all his stand, not him! They are detached, replaceable! He could drop them like a lizard drops his tail! But now he was left without his shield!

"Melone. I told you to get out there and make yourself useful." Risotto warned, heavy gaze forcing the suddenly very meek young man out of his hiding spot to go march into the hell of war. Not a moment later, a high pitched screech caught them off guard.

Well, they weren't expecting much from him to be honest.

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