Crucified -Jean X Reader

Thanks for the Memories

"Morning" you yawned

Levi nodded his head at you, handing you a mug. You took it with a sheepish smile. One sip in and you spitted it out quickly, beginning to choke.

"What the fuck" 

You glared over at Levi who was sipping from his mug.

"Had to make sure you were fully awake"

You were about to walk over and dump out the black tea when he called out to you.

"Don't recommend throwing it away, we're out of green"

"What! Already?!"

He just nodded his head yet again.

"Wouldn't have this fucking problem if it weren't for you" you muttered under your breathe.

Levi shot you a glare hearing your words and you shot him one back. You closed your eyes and tried to drink the black tea quickly in big gulps wanting that disgusting taste already out of your mouth. Finishing your drink you walked over to Levi and extended your arm out to him. He placed his mug in your hand and you walked over to the sink and washed them.

"How long till the cadets get up?" asked Levi as he leaned on the counter

"I think wake up call is in about an hour for them" you said drying your hands.

You began walking out of the mess hall's kitchen as Levi followed behind you. Entering the storage room you grabbed the clipboard that hung at the entrance of the door and began walking over to the gear. You walked up and down slowly inspecting each gear making sure everything was in tact, Levi helped out by counting everything making sure nothing was missing. He took the clipboard from you as he began writing down the items in stock.

You wiped away some sweat that was beginning to form on your forehead as you fix the last screw from one of the back plates of an ODM harness. You wiggled it and to your content, the plate was firm and sturdy.

"Well that about does it" you said wiping your hands.

You turned to Levi who began walking to the door, hanging the clipboard back in it's place.

"Everything's there, We're good to go"

"Great, thank you"

You both walked together exiting the storage room and headed back to HQ. Entering HQ you glanced up at the clock.

"Do me a favor and wake up the cadets yeah, I need to go pick up the green powder flare from Shadis"

"Right the Commander's flare, how exciting" he joked

"I'm more like shitting my pants than excited" you confessed 

"I seriously don't want anyone to die under my watch"

You felt your hair be pulled as Levi made you turn to face him.

"Accept it. You wanted to be Commander didn't you? You're a big girl, you can handle it."

You blinked a few times looking at him.

"In all my years, this is the first you've ever spoken to me as if you were my own captain"

"You needed some serious talking to, can't always baby you"

You eyerolled as you grabbed his hand and pulled it away from your head.

"Shut up, You're more of a Debby downer than I am. I'm always babying your ass"

"Says that one I always find crying. You sure got an ugly crying face."

"Tch, Just go wake up the cadets Asshole" you began walking away

"Whatever you say AssWipe" he smirked

He called this fight a win for him as he saw you walk away.

"Wipe that smile off your face before I make you pick up horse shit with your hands again" you called out, not bothering to turn to look at him. 

You knew him too well to know his expressions, you can already imagine the scowl on his face as he hears your threatening words. With that final comeback, you vanished down the hall, making your way over to Shadis office.

"Y/N" greeted Erwin.

Seemed as if the both of you had made it to Shadis' door at the same time.

"Erwin" you greeted back.

Although hating to call him by his first name, you knew you had no choice but to play nice. He was going to co-lead with you after all and you had promised not to hold any type of grudges with him for the sake of the expeditions well being.

Erwin smiled brightly hearing his first name come out of your mouth for the second time in recent time. 

Things are looking well, seems a bit more trusting 

You raised your hand up to the door to knock when you felt something heavy weigh down on you. You felt stunned when you realized Erwin had pulled you into a soul crushing hug.

"Uh what are you doing?" you asked chuckling nervously.

You were dying to pry his hands off and shove him away.

"I- I'm sorry I just felt the need to" he pulled away to look at you 

"You and me, we've come so far. Here we are at the end of the race for our long desired dream. I know things got really rough along the way between me and you, but I just wanted to wish you luck and well...that I'm proud of you Tulip"

Tulip

Your eyes scanned his for a second. You wanted to believe the words from his mouth for a moment, but it was just so hard after everything. They sounded so sincere, you haven't heard your nickname in forever and just hearing it brought you memories. A genuine smile formed on your lips as you thought about them. 

"Yeah.." 

you felt your eyes tear up remembering the good times you had with him all those years before as simple cadets. Just Erwin Smith and Y/N L/N on the training squad, the nerdiest, friendliest, funniest, kindest and most charming cadets you'd ever meet.

"We have come so far haven't we" you chuckled trying to suck up your tears.

You looked up at Erwin.

"I can't lie to you and say that I don't hate you because I do, but I do still care. And I guess, I want to thank you for at least sharing some good memories with me"

You stuck out your hand to a shocked Erwin

"Thank You Blondie, I'm sincerely proud of you and wish you luck as well"

Erwin looked down at your hand is disbelief. Why did he feel a sudden pain in his heart. It had been so long since he's ever had a sincere conversation with you and the feeling it brought to him was intense. It reminded him the reason why he liked you in the first place.

It was that kind and caring soul you always had. No matter how much damage one did to you, you always seemed to come around. And for a moment, he felt awful for everything he's done to you. He knew you deserved none of it. Especially when it came to toying with your emotions, after all, you did nothing, but care for him and comfort him and his own emotions. And all he did was stand on top and look down upon you.

"Erwin?" You called out to him.

Your brow rose up in confusion as you watched the giant man in front of you, zoned out.

He blinked away from his thoughts.

No. It's too late for all that nonsense. The time is now. This is a distraction of hers.

I HAVE TO WIN. I WILL WIN. WHATEVER IT TAKES.

He swallowed down the guilt he was starting to feel run up his throat and instead shot you a smile and accepted your hand, shaking it.

"Thank You"