Crucified -Jean X Reader

Epilogue 4: Forgotten

FINAL WARNING: THIS CHAPTER CONTAINS CH.139 SPOILERS FROM THE AOT MANGA SERIES. PLEASE CONTINUE READING AT YOUR OWN RISK/WILL.

Song Inspiration: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=exwpEbzrBbY

Thanks to the remaining members of the Survey Corp, the rumbling had finally been put down to rest. The titan curse had been broken. The once titans, were returned to normal and ran to their loved ones, embracing one another, enjoying each other's company and warmth once again.

Jean and Connie embraced each other into a tight hug as they felt the weight on their shoulders come off all at once. Tears slipped from their eyes as they reminisce everything they sacrificed and lost to get to where they are.

Both members of the Survey Corp pulled away from each other as they notice titan smoke slowly appearing, making it hard to see all around as it was thick.

"J-Jean" Connie called to him

Jean turned to look at Connie who had wide eyes. He was staring off into the smoke. Jean followed his gaze and he too felt stunned at the scene in front of him. His eyes widen as his pupils began to dilate.

"Sasha? Marco?"

There off in the distance stood their two friends smiling at them. They looked proud of them as they stood their with the biggest smiles on their faces. Jean and Connie couldn't believe their eyes. Tears once again managed to slip away taking in their friend's cheerful faces.

 Wait if their here, that must mean...

"Y/N?" Jean heard someone say behind him.

Jean turned to face Levi who was looking forward with big eyes. He watched as Levi walked closer not believing his eyes that his closest friend stood their smiling at him once again like she had all those years ago. His lips trembled as she greeted him, telling him how proud she was of Levi for making it all on his own and thanking him for keeping his promise like she asked.

"But I wanted to do this with you by my side" he whispered to her.

"I know, I'm sorry Levi. Forgive this imbecile" She smiled at him.

"I miss you so much" he sniffed.

Jean looked at Levi, confused and scared. How come Levi could see her and not him. She was his lover, he had the right to see her. After all these years, he still carried her memory with him. Jean saw Connie passing by him and walking next to Levi, greeting Y/N as well.

Why can't I see her?

"Hey! You guys see her?!" he asked

"Of course we do, she's standing right in front of us" replied Connie

Jean felt his heart beating like crazy as his eyes searched the smoke for her. He felt himself wanting to cry as he couldn't seem to find her.

Y/N, where are you?

"I can't see her!"  he said in a sense of panic

"Kirstein, you idiot she's right in front of you" said Levi

"Where?!"

Jean looked around. He felt himself growing weak as he still couldn't see her.

WHERE IS SHE? WHY CAN'T I SEE HER?!

"Don't tell me you forgotten how she's looked like Kirstein"

His eyes widen in horror.

Have I forgotten her face already? It's been so long since I've seen her. 

He tried making out Y/N's face out, but to his horror...he couldn't remember

"I-I c-can't remember..."

He felt his tears well up and his knees go weak at the realization.

But I want to see her again... I want to hold her, I want to tell her how much I love her, how much I've missed her.

He tried again, this time something appear within his eyes. He saw a body dressed in the original Survey Corps uniform as their face was scratched out. It was a glitch.

Was this suppose to be her? Why can't I make out her face?

"No, No. No. Please let me see her" he cried out

He dropped down to his knees as he pleaded and begged.

"Tch. What's wrong with you! How could you have forgotten about her already! You said you loved her, after everything she's done for us, you FORGOT HER!" Levi yelled at Jean.

Jean felt disappointed in himself. Years of fighting and he's already forgotten the face of who he loves, the face who he had been fighting for. His brain screamed at him.

"You've Forgotten about her..apologize, apologize, APOLOGIZE, C'MON APOLOGIZE"

"I'm sorry" he whispered.

He broke down crying.

"Y/N, Please let me see you. Talk to me. Please anything, something"

Levi looked down at Jean with pity. He knew how hard Jean had worked in keeping Y/N's promise. He deserved to see her at least once. He turned back to Y/N who was standing in front of Jean.

She kneeled down in front of Jean as her hand lightly caressed the crying boys face. She looked sad as tears sat in her eyes. She too was disappointment that he wasn't able to see her, but none-less, she understood it had been years since they've seen each other, it was only normal to have forgotten her face.

She stood up and let out a sigh. She watched as the smoke was starting to clear up, a sign telling her that her time here was up. She turned to Levi with a sad smile.

"Maybe next time... Take care Levi"

Levi watched as his former friend disappeared with the smoke. Jean screamed as he saw the smoke disappearing. He grabbed the air, trying to frantically hold on to the smoke, In hopes of catching a glimpse of her. But at last he was left with nothing. 

He sat there on his knees, looking out.

I didn't get to see her...I've forgotten her.

Y/N, I've forgotten what you look like.

I'm so sorry, please forgive me.

I had promised to love you forever.

He felt something all the sudden dawn on him. His eyes began to widen at his stupid realization. He dugged his hand into the deep depths of his uniform and pulled out a folded piece of paper. He unfolded it and his eyes began to fill up with tears thinking about his instant regret of not remembering about it.

So many years of carrying it and never even opening it, sat the sketch of his dream girl from all those years ago, Y/N. Here sat a clear picture of what she looked like and maybe, just maybe if he had just pulled out the paper, he could have remembered her face and seen her.

Y/N, was this our final good bye?

Did I miss it?

His tears finally left his eyes at the realization that this was a form of saying good bye to all the souls lost in the battle. Their final farewells, and Jean had missed yours by a long shot. His wet eyes casted down at the drawing, finally being able to at least remember your face.

He knew he had to give you some form of a farewell.

"Well then..Good Bye Y/N" 

He whispered as he lightly traced the drawing.

"Someday, you'll be back in my arms again..."

"Till then, your pretty boy will wait"