Edser In Love

Am I a bad mom, Serkan?

The last 4 months had been really really hectic and tiresome and exhausting for both Serkan and Eda. But they never complained. Why would they? Even such an exhausting time was happy for them living with their newborn 4 month old son Alp and their daughter Kiraz. Eda and Serkan both had bags of dark circles under their eyes because well a sound sleep was an unknown thing to them now. After Alp's birth both Serkan and Eda had taken the maternity leave for a minimum 6 months, but they were planning to work from home after completing first 6 months of Alp's birth.
First 15 days after their son was born were still easy, because doctors had kept Eda in the hospital after she gave birth in middle of nowhere with help of Serkan. So, handling the baby with the help of doctors, nurses and Serkan was easy. After that, it was a roller coaster ride for them handling Kiraz and Alp both. They knew better than to neglect Kiraz because they understood she would need extra attention or she would be jealous of Alp and Serkan and Eda both would need to equally give time to Kiraz. They tried that but Eda was at times very busy handling Alp. But Serkan always came to the rescue to handle Kiraz. Serkan and Eda both were grateful for their kids and even though they were tired all the time, their faces were always smiling and happy. Four months had passed and Serkan had the first time experience at handling kids, that too his own. The first time he held Alp in the hospital, he cried. He cried hard. He had never imagined holding his child because after the tumour, he had literally given up this dream. He never failed to tell Eda how grateful he was for her existence ever since that day. The first night after Alp's birth, they both had cried. Eda and Serkan holding each other's hand while their other hand had Alp and Kiraz respectively. They hoped for only good times to follow them for the rest of the lives. Then once they came home from hospital, Serkan had made sure to be their for Eda all the time, helping her with whatever she needed. He eventually learned how to change baby's diaper and clothes and how to make him burp after his feed. He was definitely becoming the perfect father learning from Eda who seemed to be an expert in child rearing as she always mentioned that Kiraz was actually a stubborn child since birth. Serkan felt proud of his wife for doing it all alone the first time. But this time he made sure to be there for his family.
He would also set up hot bathtubs for her to relax her body and mind while he would look after the kids to give her the time and space she needed. He would cook for the family and he would help Kiraz with her homework. And Eda daily fell in love with him like first time. She hadn't imagined a better family than this. It was perfect. The only thing that actually suffered was their sex life. They were pretty active until her last trimester but ever since their baby's birth, they wouldn't be able to take out a lot of time for their intimate affairs. Sometimes as Alp slept, they would manage to have a round of it, only to be interrupted by his crying. But they never complained. They enjoyed whatever time they somehow managed and knew that once the children grow up a little, they would have all the time to themselves. For now, they wanted to experience all the things with their children.
For the past few days now, Alp had been extra cranky, he would constantly cry and it would take so much effort to make him stop. But today, today she had woken up to a sweet sight in front of her.
As she stirred in sleep, she remembered that she had been extra exhausted the night before because Alp was actually giving her a hard time crying non stop and as and when she would try to sleep when he would calm down a little, he would start crying again. So Eda was not able to sleep and Serkan was awake with her not wanting to sleep either. Serkan had put Kiraz to sleep in her room. And now they were here sitting on the bed in their room wondering what was going on with their boy. He was clearly uncomfortable but both of them were not able to decipher why he was crying, only trying to shush him and rock him slowly and gently. It was past 2 am now. Eda was yawning because she hadn't slept in the past 24 hours. So Serkan spoke slowly,
"My love, give Alp to me. I will manage with him. Come on, try sleeping. You need it Eda."
"But askim, you need to sleep too. It's okay, I am okay with staying awake."
"No Eda, you need that more. Come on, give him. And lay down and close your eyes."
"Tamam Serkan. Thank you so much." She spoke smiling lightly and handed him Alp carefully.
Serkan took the little guy in his arms who was wide awake and instantly giggled once before going back to crying as Serkan rocked him. He got an idea. Maybe he could try that. It was definitely going to be helpful for both Eda and Alp. He put Alp on his chest, laid down on the bed with back to the mattress and Alp on his naked chest while with one hand he pulled Eda to him. Eda instantly came close, kept her head on his shoulder and pressed her body into his side deeply inhaling his scent.
"My little boy, let anne sleep my baby. She needs to sleep Alp. Okay let me sing your anne's favourite song. Maybe you are going to like it too."
He started singing slowly. And Eda was so much in surprise and in love. How could he manage to make her fall in love with him more and more every single minute of the day. She kissed his shoulder where her head was and instantly fell asleep. Serkan kept caressing her back with one hand while to his surprise even Alp had stopped crying listening to the song. When he finished the song, he whispered childishly to Alp, "ohh my my Alp, are you already preferring anne. See you like the same song as her. My baby boy, thank you for letting anne sleep."
And the round and small green eyes stared at him as he spoke cutely to his son. Apparently Alp was definitely a mini Serkan. That's what all his family and friends and even Eda said. He had same eyes as his father and was also a redhead just like his father. But he had Eda's nose and lips. And he was definitely stubborn like Eda. Serkan always joked with Eda that she had not forgotten to pass on her stubbornness trait to their kids.
Alp giggled a little when Serkan held him out a little rocking him in air. And Serkan smiled. Atleast Alp had stopped crying now. Now the task was to put him to sleep so that even he could manage some sleep as his wife.
"Alp, baby, do you want to listen to my favourite song? Okay, let's do it. Then you can choose which one out of the two is your favourite."
He started singing his favourite song and Alp's eyes were almost closing now with sleep. A minute later, he fell asleep on Serkan's chest and Serkan held him lightly that way to keep him in place as he himself closed his eyes.
It was almost 8 in the morning when Eda woke up to see that Alp was still sleeping peacefully on Serkan's chest and Serkan was holding him lightly even in sleep to keep him safe. The father son duo looked so peaceful and calm and well had the same expressions while sleeping. She chuckled and thought to herself, God, did I just give birth to another robot? But they are my robots. I love them.
She quietly got out of the bed not wanting to disturb her husband and son's sleep and went to Kiraz's room to see her sleeping as well. She picked her up and carried her to their bedroom and put her carefully on the bed to not wake any of the 3 up. Kiraz immediately in sleep went to Serkan's arm and Serkan opened his eyes a little to see the movement and instantly snuggled Kiraz in his arm as he saw their daughter.
"Serkan, I am sorry. I didn't mean to wake you up. Go back to sleep love. I just moved Kiraz here because she was insecure yesterday that Alp sleeps with us while she doesn't. And it's a school holiday today. She can sleep in late. Also I will just take a quick shower before this little boy decides to wake up. Sleep askim." Eda whispered.
Serkan just nodded and closed his eyes back.
Eda took a quick hot shower relaxing herself and then changed into a comfortable tank top and trackpants. She saw all of then still sleeping peacefully and the sight was definitely a one that would now be etched in her memory forever. In one arm he was holding Alp who was sleeping on his chest and in another arm Kiraz snuggled on his side. And his head was on Kiraz's side while Kiraz's long hair were sweeping on his face making him twitch his nose a little. She had tears in her eyes at the view in front of her. She picked up her phone from the nightstand and clicked their picture sending it to his mother and her aunt with the caption Sleeping beauties.