[曦澄 | XiCheng]: The Fear Of Falling In Love [~PART 1~]

[26.] Tread lightly, Jiang Wanyin.

Lan Xichen heard someone enter his study and smiled; he didn't really need to look up to know who it was  –  only one person would dare enter without knocking. The two of them spending time together yesterday, and saying the things they did to each other, took their relationship to a new level, and now Jiang Wanyin was bold enough to approach him without bowing, or enter without knocking on his door. 

His heart was full; he was perfectly happy.

Jiang Cheng approached very quietly, but had no illusions that he could possibly surprise Zewu-Jun  –  he had sensed him coming even before he stepped over the threshold of the room most probably; the Gusu Clan training was notorious, and now Lan Xichen himself was a Shīfu  here. Still, he bit his lips and kneeled behind him, hugging his back and leaning his head in on his broad shoulders. He felt him sigh and shiver a little. Jiang Wanyin smiled; it seemed that every small touch coming from him brought pleasure to his husband. 

The feeling that this knowledge gave him was indescribable. He was starting to realize his worth, and the power he had over his loved one  –  Zewu-Jun would not deny him anything.

- Forgive me, Zewu-Jun... I missed you.  –  he mumbled, pouting.

- Good morning, love. Did you rest well? I am afraid I had to leave you all alone; today I am catching up on errands. –  Lan Xichen reached back and his long fingers touched Sandu Shengshou's face gently.

- I am fine... Because of you. I swear it, it has never happened before!  –  he sighed.  –  But I was cold. I was cold without you.  

His grip on his husband's body tightened and he buried his face in the soft fabric of the Gusu robe.

- Oh, sweetheart... Come, we must get you warm.  –  Lan Huan laughed, letting him sit in his lap; Jiang Cheng immediately cuddled and kissed his neck.  –  Is it better, darling?

- Much, much better!  -  Jiang Cheng purred.  –  What are you working on? Can I help?  –  he peeked at the parchment rolls on the low table in front of Zewu-Jun.

- Mmmm. I am writing letters and lists, honey. Birthday stuff. It's annoying, but I have to do it.  –  he mumbled. –  Although, as the years pass, I am more and more tempted to pay someone to do my letters for me  –  I write so many!  –  he laughed slightly.  –  You will see. Once you are Clan Leader... it is inevitable.

- Uh... I hope my Father will be alive and well many more years to come!  -  Jiang Wanyin huffed, but then he bit his lip.  –  Can I ask you something, husband?  –  he said shyly.

- Of course, sweetheart. Anything.

- When this happens... When I become Clan Leader... I will need to be in Yunmeng...  And if we have children... I was wondering... -  he blushed and looked away. –  Will you come with me?

Lan Xichen put the brush down and was still and silent for a moment. He could clearly feel the smaller man clinging to his body, shivering slightly  –  but he wasn't sure it was because of the cold room. He slid his hands over his husband's back and hugged him.

- You seem to have thought a lot about it, my sweetest. Our children.  –  he said quietly.

Jiang Cheng  turned his face up to stare at him and nodded.

- It is all I can think about lately. –  he murmured. –  I feel so empty... now that I have you, and we can... we could... I think, before, I was just sad. Desperate. Scared. Now I have hope. You are my hope, Zewu-Jun.  –  he closed his eyes as to prevent tears from falling and felt a warm palm on his cheek; he hoped for a kiss –  yet, after yesterday's squabble, he dared not ask for one.