Reviewer: therosepoetk
Written by: althermysterySo first of all, I really like the title. I like how we’re getting that idea that you’re going to be focusing on a character that’s maybe really shy, really introverted and lacks confidence? It’s just a prediction of mine so far, so I want to see how that goes. You’ve piqued my interest, so I think that’s great. The cover is very simplistic, very strategically made to get straight to the point. I feel that it represents your message really well with the monotone colour scheme and the fonts and styles, however, I feel that you could work on the clarity of the image itself. For example, the title on the cover and even the credits are very small, barely noticeable. Readers on Wattpad usually spare a glance at the cover before entering the story, so they likely will not remember much about the cover. That doesn’t mean you should scrap the cover entirely, but it’s up to you as the creator. The blurb gives off the information that I need to know about this collection, but at the same time, I think it could use a lot more detail. For one, that one simple sentence has been asking a lot more questions. What kind of pain? What kind of confusion? What kind of despair? I feel that since your description is so short and so vague, it doesn’t appeal much to me as an outsider. But the opening is immensely intriguing. I like how you get right into it - right into the character, right into their thought process. I’ve never encountered an author who wrote with such vagueness - but in a good way.
I think you leave a lot of room for the readers to interpret the story the way they want, which I think is a great, resonating feeling that stays with you long after the short story itself. The characters are all very diverse and emotional, which is great. I believe you can add onto these characters by having them struggle more with their thoughts. We as readers need to empathise with the characters, we need to see ourselves within those characters to actually feel their pain like it’s our own. But you do a great job with the emotional appeal, which is nice. I think the main problem I see here is grammar and coherence, because I feel like that retracts away from the power of your tales. But the plots, each and every one of them, are so powerful. I really hope you get the chance to show them off, to make people understand the importance of mental health and support systems. All the best Mist, and remember that I am always in your corner!
![](https://img.wattpad.com/cover/284568989-288-k263988.jpg)
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