Reviewer: june_berrin
Written by: ClaireMari29Thank you so much for giving me the chance to review your story.
It was a great story, and I enjoyed it.
❥ Title: The title is unique and suits the story well. It gives off a romantic vibe at the same time.
❥ Cover: The cover is simply beautiful and creative, but it doesn’t relate to the title that much. It portrays a broken or sad girl, while the other side is contrary to it. The cover needs a lot of improvements. Instead of making them face each other, why not have their backs face each other. And I think that it would suit the circle frame around it, making the two sides look better together.
Also, to make the details a bit more noticeable, can you find a pic or something where the sad or happy side face is staring downwards, appearing sad or shy? If not, then try to make their faces not stare up in the same direction, so that the different emotions on each side will look more diverse.
❥ Blurb: The blurb was well written and structured. It gives the reader a gist of the story. But there were a few grammatical errors found, for example, mixed verb tenses. As you have started the blurb in the past tense, then you need to continue it in the past tense too. You need to change ‘belong to’ to ‘belonged to’ also ‘leads’ to ‘led.’
The rest was good, but I still recommend proofreading it again for any other issues.
❥ Storyline: The plot idea was unique and good. From the first chapter itself, there was a problem with the flow. The words don't flow well together, making it seem a bit awkward. I also recommend writing ‘18 hours and 50 mins’ in words.
I do not know a lot about the TEKKEN world, so please bear with me if I make a mistake. The story is at a proper pace, and each chapter has good content in them up to the part I have read. And using a bit more descriptive and creative writing will help enhance your story.
❥ Characters: To be honest, when I checked the ‘characters’ chapter, I was stunned. You have put out too many characters all at once, making it confusing to understand that I ended up not reading it entirely. Usually, in character chapters, only the main characters are mentioned. So do keep that in mind. The characters were developed fine and portrayed well.
❥ Grammar and Punctuations: I have already mentioned some of the grammatical errors that I have found in the blurb. And such mistakes were also repeated in the chapters. So, I do recommend some proofreading.
❥ Conclusions: Overall, it was a great book. Apart from some minor issues and grammatical blunders, it was fun to read. Your book has great potential. Hope you have a great day.
Best Wishes!!
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