THANDI
I've been in New Brighton for close to a week now busy preparing for my big day. After Gundo asked me to be his wife I called aunt Noma and she was beyond suprised that I have someone who wants to marry me, so much that she couldn't hide it in her tone and words, but then she's the only person who can lead me through this process so I had to swallow all my thoughts and endure this knowing it's only until Gundo and I are married then I'll go back to my safe place
I started communicating with her regarding how things would go that side and even though she insited that she has things covered with regards to who my delegates would be I felt a need to just go down there while there's still a bit of time to make sure everything is in order
There's uncles in the family that she gathered, those that obviously dance to her tune
My stay in my grandmother's house brings back bitter sweet memories. It's times like these that make me wish she and mother were still alive. I know they would be making such a big deal of this and I would actually be fully enjoying these moments where we prepare to welcome the Netshia's but instead it feels like I'm walking on egg shells with my aunt and half the time I cant say what's on my mind because I don't want to start trouble before my big day
I also find myself thinking about my father, I haven't seen or thought of him in the longest time but when aunt Noma asked if I would tell him that I'm getting married the thoughts of him were inevitable, and they were bitter
I immediately said no and when she asked if I'm sure I confirmed it. That man left me when I needed him the most, I don't see why I should let him know about this because he's already missed out on so much so what's one more thing
Asanda came back with Melo and I wnd she's been of so much help with the preparations. We've been doing a lot of cleaning and shopping and as the days led to Saturday things got more hectic
"So... Are you ready to become Mrs. Netshia?" Asanda asks while we bake scones in the kitchen
"I think so... I'm a little nervous about tomorrow's negotiations"
"Don't stress about it a lot, you have a man whose willing to meet your family's demands, that should make things go easier"
"But I don't want this to turn into a sale. The sole purpose of lobola should be to unite families, not to sell me off"
"Well atleast I'll be there to make sure no one goes off the rails" Melo walks in and deeps his fingers in the bucket full of fresh scones
"You're part of the delegates?" Asanda asks
"Of course I am, this is my sister we are going to be discussing, and I'm probably the only person in that room who really knows her" He winks at me and excuses himself
Later in the evening I'm called into one of the bedrooms where there's other aunties, they start giving me a lecture on how to be a good wife, the typical advices that old people still believe in even though I know I probably won't follow half of what they are saying I still sit quietly and nod, when I leave the room I have one thought in mind, this is really happening, I'm really marrying Gundo
****
The following morning we are up early sweeping the big yard and making sure everything is in order. Everyone is hands on and there's no time for chatter
Asanda and I are both sweeping when Aunt Noma approaches me
"Can we talk?" She says and I excuse myself and follow her into her bedroom
"We need to talk about who will recieve your brideprice money, obviously it should be me seeing your grandmother left you guys in my care when she passed but there's people who feel that wr should let your father know and also include him in this"
"I've already expressed that I don't want to tell him, and it's only a few hours before the Netshia's arrive, why is this being brought up now?"
"Your mother was married, you use your father's surname so Samuel believes it's only right we involve the Maduna people, even if it's just to let them know you're joining another family"
Ofcourse it would be uncle Samuel, the one always looking to start trouble
"I don't care who accepts the money as long as it's not him. He abandoned us and I definetly don't need him or his family ruining my day. Just tell uncle Samuel that you'll be the full recipient and that's that, like you said, you were our guardian after grandma passed "I say knowing she will take control if she knows she is gets to keep the full amount
" So you're okay with it being me only? "I see excitement written all over her face
" Yes, think about it. If you contact my dad he might want half of it if not more, do you really want to share with him? "
" No way, all that man did was dump the two of you here and leave you to be my problem. It's time for me to bare the fruits of it all now the same way I struggled with you alone" she says and I agree with her
Gundo also calls to let me know his delegates have left the guesthouse and are on their way now. The plan is to finidh everything today. We won't be doing two parts because honestly this is emotionally taxing and too much planning too. Being here isn't healthy for me or Melo because we are always reminded of how we burdened aunt Noma and it's always almost as if we are to blame for the decision my father took so it's better if we finish with this and move on with our lives
The Netshia's arrive and I have to remain in the bedroom with Asanda as the delegates have their discussion. I lay in the bed all dressed up and Asanda tries to distract me because I'm feeling very nervous, I only feel myself calm down when I see Gundo's name pop up on my phone and I quickly answer the video call
"Love" I say when I see his face and perfect smile
"Baby, how are you?" He asks and Asanda hums in the background making me blush a little
"I'm as good as can be, I just want everything to go well"
"Don't stress, everything will go as we planned and when the sun sets you will be Mrs. Netshia"
"You don't know my uncles Gundo"I tell him because I know they might overcharge and his family might nit be happy with that
" I told my uncles to meet whatever demands your family had so we shouldn't have any problems."
"Even if they are being unreasonable?"
"If it means you get to be mine then so be it, its a once of thing meanwhile we get to be together forever. Stop stressing my love"
"You sound very calm" I say and he chuckles
"It's because I told my uncles not to return without my bride today so if they mess up they will be forced to sleep there" He says making me laugh
"You can't order older people around"
"I'll do whatever I need to do in order to have and keep you in my life Thandi. No matter what. I love you" he says and I feel myself calm down, everything is going to be okay, I don't need to stress about anything
"I love you more" I say and we talk a bit more before he hangs up
I feel very positive about what the future holds for us, I never thought one day I'd be in a room while my family and another sit and discuss the joining of two families. I never even thought of marriage but Gundo came into my life and suddenly everything isn't a dream out of reach anymore, everything has been amazing and as much as I sometimes get scared that things won't always be like this but the love I feel is a lot greater than the fear and it surely overpowers it. One day I'll look back and remember this day as a day that I made one of the greatest decisions I've ever made.
The day I became Mrs. Netshia
