THANDI
The following day after work I don't waste a lot of time getting home. I'm almost out of time and I know I need to make sure Gundo leaves this evening
I've weighed my options, I've even considered coming clean to him but I can't. Telling him about Chase would also mean telling him about Musa and I know I'd be digging Musa's grave by doing that
If there was never a time where I felt horrible for cheating, I'm feeling it now. I'm feeling it now more than ever because I have to choose between Musa and myself. I don't know what Chase has in store for me, how far he's willing to take this but I know exactly what will happen to Musa if Gundo ever found out
I silently cry in the back seat while being driven home. Music is playing so none of the guards hear my soft cries
I feel exhausted.
When we arrive I find Gundo in the lounge on a phone call amd when he sees me he hangs up and gets up from the couch
"sthandwa sam [My love]" he days hugging me and I throw my bag on the couch "How was your day?"
"It was long, yours?"
"It was busy"
"Are you struggling to work from here?" I ask hoping he will make this easier for me
"No, I'm good with running things from here, Given is making appearances where I was supposed to and this ship is still sailing"
"You don't have to babysit me Gundo, I'll be fine... Really"
"I'm not babysitting you. I'm making sure you're safe. Baby, one of my men attacked you, I'm not exactly sure who to trust right now"
"He's dead"
"His partner isn't"
"What if he was working alone?"
"I doubt it, what would Dean benefit from your death? I believe he was just the sent to carry out the hit. The master mind is still there and until I catch him, You're not entirely safe"
I don't push him further in fear that I'll raise suspicion so I proceed to go change out of my scrubs "I'll go change"
"Do that and I'll get dinner started"
"You're cooking?" I ask and he nods "You hate cooking"
"We both have to eat and you've been standing all day, I can't expect you to get home and cook as well" he starts preparing and a ping of guilt sits full force on my chest. He's really trying and I'm here trying to figure out a way to make him leave
"What a way to start the year huh" I whisper. We didn't celebrate new years day, it was still too tense and that day weighed on me more than ever
I'm one of those people who make a big deal out of the new year, I just have to start it calmly and positively for me to believe it's going to be a good year, right now I see no indication that it's going to go good. If anything, I feel like it's one obstacle after another
"Everything will be okay, I promise my love"
I walk to him and I put my hands around his waist. When I don't say anything he turns and embraces me as well. He kisses my forehead and silently holds me. I feel so safe in his arms and the thought of not having him here with me makes me panic, why does Chase want me alone, is he looking to finish what Dean started... When I feel the tears coming I pull away "I won't be long" I whisper and I feel his eyes on me until we can't see each other anymore
I decide to take a quick shower while at it, something I do when I'm too stress. The water doesn't solve my problems but it eases the tension I feel on my neck and shoulders
