Algebra and irish;) (student/teacher)

Chapter 63. (dreams and memories)

Chapter 63————————————————————————————————————

Alex was dreaming. She knew she was dreaming but she couldn't wake up. It wasn't a normal dream it was a memory. She wanted to wake up. Desperately needed to wake up. She didn't want to re live this.

(*buzz buzz*

Alex looked down at her phone and seen she had one new message. It was three am who was messaging her? She grabbed her phone off the night stand and rubbed the sleep from her eyes. She opened the message.

'hey wake up'- Lee

'I'm awake. Are you ok? What's wrong?'-Alex

'I'm drunk'- Lee

Alex felt worry slither its way into her heart. Lee and her had been broken up for a while now but she still loved him. And the fact he was driving drunk terrified her.

'where are you?'-Alex

'gas station by your house.'- Lee

'stay put'- Alex

Alex climbed out of bed and quickly threw on the outfit she had worn last night. She ran a brush through her hair and checked her appearance in the mirror. After hurrying outside and into her car she quickly made her way over to the gas station. Lee had his back to her and was leaning against his truck filling up with gas. He was swaying on his feet and kept having to brace his self.

"little to much to drink?"

Lee jumped and turned to face her giving her a sloppy grin.

"a little" he said chuckling

The sound causing Alex's shoulders to relax.

"you know I hate when you drink and drive."

"I'm careful"

"sure you are."

"you know I'm a good driver."

"a good driver wouldn't drink and drive."

He stumbled again then shrugged.

"touché"

Alex grinned in triumph.

"park your car. You can ride with me."

Alex didn't bother arguing she knew what was fixing to happen.

After parking she climbed into the passenger seat and waited for lee. He climbed in and looked over at her. After staring at her for a moment her pulled her to him and crashed his lips to hers. His hands roamed all over her body and Alex could feel her heart hammering against her ribs. She whimpered and shoved her hands in his hair. They broke apart only when Alex pulled away.

"we're still at the gas station" Alex breathed.

"oh yea" he chuckled leaning his forehead against hers.

He pulled away and started his truck. Driving until they came to a dead end road that Alex recognized.

Once again lee hauled her to him and Alex put up no fight. She ran her hands down his face his chest... Trying to remember everything about him. 'I love you' her brain kept repeating but she refused to let the words escape her lips.

They both made quick work of their clothes and ended up having sex. After it was over lee wouldn't even look at her. They were on separate sides of the truck and Alex's eyes were filled with tears. She could see the regret in his body language. She hated herself. Why did she do this? She felt like a common whore.

"take me to my car please."

Lee didn't speak but just cranked up the truck and started back toward the gas station. Alex closed her eyes and leaned her head against the window. When they stopped she scrambled out of the truck as fast as possible. After he drove away she sat on the side walk by her car for a while. Trying to block out the thoughts going through her head.

'whore,slut,disgusting,worthless,'

The words kept echoing in her ears)

Alex shot up straight in bed gasping for air. She felt the bile rising in her throat and ran for her bathroom. She made it to the toilet just in time to empty her stomach. She got the her feet and quickly wiped her mouth and brushed her teeth. She couldn't stop the tears from coming. She sat on her bed and curled into a ball and wept. All the Hurt in her heart was coming out through her eyes. She was a different person but the memory of that night still hurt her. He had treated her like trash. Like nothing. Later that same day he had apologized it had soothed her hurt then but looking back now... She would've done anything for him. Would have taken a smile as an apology. She was such an idiot then. She hated herself. Apart of her still did. She wiped her eyes and took a few deep breaths.

*buzz buzz*

Alex's eyes jerked to her phone then to the clock. It was three am.

"please God no" she whispered as she flipped open her phone .

She breathed a sigh of relief when she seen Luke's picture.

"hello?" she answered shakily

"lass can you unlock the door?" he slurred quietly.

He was drunk. After that dream Alex wasn't sure if she could handle a drunk male wanting sex. But she wouldnt just leave him outside.

She flipped her phone closed and made her way downstairs to unlock the door.

Luke was standing on her doorstep with a dandilion.

"I'm sorry twas the only flower I could find" he mumbled rubbing his eyes.

"it's fine Luke" she replied fighting a smile.

"can I come to bed?"

"yes come on."

She locked the door then took his hand and helped him upstairs. He all but fell into bed and opened his arms for her.

"I - I can't have sex with you right now."

Luke sat up looking confused and scrubbed a hand down his face.

"first of all love we don't have sex.. We make love. And second I just want to hold you. Now please come here and allow me to do so"

Alex felt another piece of her emotional armor crumple away. She slid into the bed and into Luke's arms resting her head above his heart. He smoothed away the hair from her face.

"I love you lass"

"I love you too Luke" Alex whispered

A tear slid down her face onto his shirt. She didn't know why she was crying but she felt like it was needed. She felt like it was a kind of happy tear. She didn't have to feel worthless anymore. She closed her eyes and allowed the beating of Luke's heart to lull her to sleep.

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A/N hey guys I really really need you to tell me what you think about Alexs dream/memory thanks! Love you all! Stay tuned my lovelies and I know alot of you are hating on Lee and that has alot to do with the way I've painted him but he's actually a good guy. He just kinda broke my heart... Broke is actually a kind word but you can't help how you feel. Just like Alex can't help that she still loves him. And unfortunately a part of her probably always will. So don't judge to harshly!