Fifty shades of Phan

Chapter 11

(PICTURE BY- Lexie Cleasby)
"Welcome to Zing Zing's Chinese, what can I get you?" The lady behind the till asks,
"I'll have a chicken and noodle soup, with some prawn crackers, lemon chicken and throw in some of those bean sprouts for good luck" Dan orders, as the lady scribbles his request down on a white pad of paper.

"And you you sir?" The lady asks, turning her attention to me,
"Uh..." I stutter, skimming though the menu, why is this all written in Chinese!?
"I'll just have the same as Dan" I chuckle nervously, feeling like I'm holding a queue up, even though there's no one behind us.
"That will be £12.35 please" the lady smiles, and Dan presents her his credit card before I have time to fumble in my pocket for my wallet,
"Dan!" I hiss,
"My treat" he replies, entering His PIN number into the machine.
"thank you sir, if you want to take a seat down there your food will be ready shortly" the lady offers, pointing to a row of uncomfortable looking chairs by a fish tank.

I perch next to the fish enclosure and watch as the scaly creatures swim round and round in circles, occasionally exchanging a quick nose bump, before swimming along.
"They're 'Parazacco' fish" Dan smirks over my shoulder, and I look at him confused,
"It says right here that they're Red Dragonet?" I giggle, and Dan's smirk quavers as he sulks back in his chair,
"I call you... SUSAN!" I shout, pointing to the biggest fish, who is staring evilly at me, which breaks the short moment of silence in the take away,
"I name that one Jonathan" Dan scrapes in, pointing to the smallest fish which appears to be a Minnow,
"Jonathan seems to be in the wrong tank" I giggle, as the tiny fish wiggles in and out of the fake seaweed placed artistically at the base of the tank.

"What should we call that last one though?" Dan asks pointing to a jet black fish with small white lines on it's back,
"I don't know, I've never seen a fish like that, I guess it's still a Red Dragonet though?" I wonder out loud, and Dan's face suddenly lights up,
"MOTHER OF GOD I HAVE THE BEST NAME EVER" He squeals excitedly, and I nod at him to tell him to continue,
"We should call it Dil Howlter" he smiles mischievously, and I send him a questioning face,
"It's our names put together" Dan explains,
"I thought that was Phan, like Becky and Jessica made up?" I carried on, and Dan just shrugs,
"I guess he's called Dil Howlter then" I smile at Dan.

"ORDER 21?" A chef calls,
"That's us!" Dan jumps up, rubbing his hands together, and I grab the bag from the chef, thanking him as I prise it from his sweaty hands,
"Tax-" Dan begins to hail, but I stop him,
"LETS-A-GO" I impersonate Mario, as I start to gallop down the road,
"Phillll" Dan whines, "I don't want to walk"
"Then gallop" I sass, and I hear Dan groan, which slightly turned me on....

"Hurry up Dan I'm waiting on the doorstep!" I sigh, as Dan trudges down his path,
"I'm coming, I'm coming, keep your fur on" Dan sulks, unlocking the front door, allowing me into the house,
"Thanks bear" I grin, stepping through the doorframe and placing the food on the dining table.

"Music?" Dan calls from the living room,
"Sure!" I reply, and New born by muse whirrs to life from the speakers over head.
"YASSSSSS" I shout, having a secret rave around the dining table,
"Cutlery is in the second drawer down on the left of the sink" Dan directs, entering the room, and I get out two sets of knives and forks.

Dan and I eat in almost silence, only making a few remarks, and creating small talk now and then, and by the time we finish dinner, and I had helped wash up, Dan and I both agree I should be getting going,
"Thank you for the Chinese and cooking" I thank Dan as I leave the house,
"it's fine" Dan smiles, but he almost looks disappointed, I decide to shrug it off as I walk down the path way hailing a passing taxi, I wave a final time to Dan before clambering into the vehicle and heading home.

"I'm home!" I shout sarcastically, pretending I have a family who were itching to know how my day went, but of course no, the only reply I got was the sweet silence coming from my old, ugly apartment,
"I wish Dan lived with me" I sigh, trudging up the stairs to my bed, where I quickly strip so I'm stood in my boxers staring at my hideous reflection.

I flex my non existent muscles, pretending to be a strong man for a few minutes, before I feel self conscious that I'm stood half naked in my room, so I quickly slip on some PJ trousers and a shirt, then clamber into my bed.

"Teeth!" I groan, sliding out the side of my bed and dragging myself into the bathroom. I wet my brush, and apply toothpaste, inserting the brush in my mouth, moving it to and throw,
Imagine if this was Dan's... DON'T EVEN PHIL! That's just weird!!

I spit the toothpaste out my mouth, which I was honestly imagining as a different white substance, and quickly remove my contact lenses which I almost forgot about, before returning to my bed.
Sliding my glasses on my face, I pick up my book that was placed on the side of my bedside table, and read a few chapters, until the clock officially reads 2:46am, and I decide nows a good time to settle down for the night.

"Good night Dan" I whisper to the other side of my empty bed, and I swear I almost hear a reply...

"Goodnight Phil..."