Make Me Smile || Kurt Cobain

Chapter 41 - You're My Vitamin

Kurt

"Kurt, did you cut yourself off heroin?" Krist asked.

I guess it's that obvious.

My continued silence must had given him the answer he needed.

"Kurt... I love you. You know I do. I'm happy for you honestly"

"Yeah me too it's just... the withdrawal and the pain. God!"

Krist was silent for awhile as he looked at me pitifully. Wheels were definitely turning in his head.

"You're doing this for Ashlyn right?" He asked. I groaned and he seemed to take that as a yes. "She's a really good influence on you, you know? Both directly and indirectly"

"Well, yeah. But besides that I know I need to get healthy. I just have to" I said.

"Maybe you can ask Izzy for some tips?" Krist suggested randomly.

Neglecting the gnawing stomach pain in my stomach, I stood up and gazed at my best friend with a look of sincere confusion written on my face.
The silence persisted for a while until I uttered that immortal word.

"What?"

"Yeah. You know I've been hanging out with Duff and he's not so bad. He told me Izzy was on heroin a while back and he managed to get himself cleaned up" He said. "Of course I didn't mention yours"

"Yeah I know" I knew Krist wouldn't go around gossiping about me. "But I'm just wondering why that idea would come to your mind. Yes I'm fucking happy for Izzy that he managed to get over that but that fucker has it out for me"

"And once again, I'm very sure that's all in your head."

"He fucking punched Ashlyn in the face while aiming for me" Krist winced.

"Yeah... but in his defense, you guys did push him to that"

"Courtney did. I didn't." I said genuinely. "And whatever. He has something against me. If I tell him about the heroin thing, the first thing he'll do is tell Ashlyn"

"Yeah... that's my point. It's a good thing." Krist said. "The girl loves you man. Even if she does know, she'll be really proud of you for trying to quit"

"True... but I don't want her to know at all" I stated. "I just wanna get clean. Sparkly clean"

"Well, good luck with that" Krist said. "Are you feeling much better now?"

"Yeah a little bit. It's more bearable I guess" I said with a sigh. "I probably just need to sleep it off."

"Well, I'll leave you to it. I've gotta go spend some time with Shelli" Krist stated.

"Yeah, wave your perfectly happy relationship in my face. Wave it. Wave it with pride" I mocked making the giant laugh.

"Just go to sleep Kurt. Catch you around" He said, exiting the room.

Now here I was, alone once again.

I let out a loud groan. Which I guess I've been doing lately. I need to stop.

But God, it's been tiring. Three whole days of nothing but promotional work, photo shoots and interviews. I love the writing, the music and the performance but anytime I remember that I'm an actual celebrity it eats me up inside.

After this tour I need a vacation to a Caribbean island or something.

Yeah. That's it.

My thoughts were interrupted with a call. And from none other than my favorite girl. I put on a small smile as I picked the phone up.