Losing My Mind

Chapter 49

The following morning, Rory wakes up with the worst headache, the sorest throat that feels like it's been scratched, and aching eyes.

He doesn't remember anything, not a lot at all. The last thing he remembers was the bar kicked him out for being too aggressive as they refused to serve him when they believed he was over the limit. He refused to go until the security guard showed him the exit.

He stumbled down the LA strip, and the dazzling lights were all a blur. He could barely maintain his balance and reach for his phone, managing to call Josh for help. Rory made the mistake of leaving; he made the mistake of letting the news get to him.

He was fine before all of this. Everything about his dad was a distant memory. He put it in a box and locked it away in his mind.

As he laid by the fountain, watching the people go by, the idea of being alone was now a monotonous cycle.

He needed her, he needed Ryleigh here, and he hated the look into her doubtful forest green eyes as he wanted his space. But not her; Rory should have let her come along.

She could've convinced him not to drink, find a quiet place, or head back to the mountains. But he couldn't get her into trouble again. He didn't want her involved with his demons.

His eyes snapped open as he remembered Ryleigh, and he glanced around the room because it didn't look familiar. However, the pillow has a fresh, pleasant scent. It smells just like her. So Rory is here in Ryleigh's room.

'Hey, how are you feeling?' The soft voice hovers near him, and Ryleigh sits beside him, all changed and ready to start the day.

Her eyes had a lovely, sad look of empathy, enough for Rory to want her to be closer to him.

Rory doesn't speak as he raises himself to her eye level, extends his hands to cup her cheeks, and leans in close for a kiss.

But Ryleigh stops him by grabbing his hands and removing them from her face.

'Not right now.' She said, 'This isn't the way to sort your problems out...Talk.'

Anything to keep him from feeling upset, he craved the sensation of self-pity sex. But at the same time, she's right.

Rory falls back onto the bed, face up with his eyes closed and one arm above his head.

'Twenty-three years.... twenty-three funking years. I didn't hear from this man, and now, he has the liberty to show his face and speak out on how badly Mom had raised my brother and me. He doesn't even know the funking half of it.' He said. 'And then to say at least "one of us had survived" is out of order. I swear if I could kill him. I would beat the shit out of him, so he can't talk again. I wouldn't care if I went back to prison for it.'

'I would.' Ryleigh said, 'And so would your mum and Layla too.

'If you want to redeem yourself, you'll have to start excepting that running away from your demons or drinking yourself into a state will never improve anything. All you are doing is hurting the close people who care about you.'

Rory's heart sunk, lower than a shipwreck at the bottom of the sea. He was on the verge of losing his anchor, helping him float. She was firm but kind at the same time. He can't afford to let her slip away.

'Ryleigh. I'm sorry. I really am. I'm just letting it all go. I don't really mean I would do it. I-I-I just want this to go away. Make it stop.'

'It will. If you stop letting it take over your life.'

'Please don't hate me.'

'I don't Rory. I can't find a way or help you cope if you won't let me.'

'I know. You offered to yesterday, and I should have taken it. I'm an idiot.'

'At least that is something we can agree on.' She tuts with a small smile.

Rory reciprocated the smile. Building trust will take time, but at least the anchor is letting him set sail again.

'I'll make it up to you.' Rory said.

'You don't have to do that. You coming back has convinced me enough.'

He takes her hand and kisses it. 'You say that, but I will.'

'There is a spare towel over there. You're welcome to use the bathroom. Also made you some tea and toast. Take your time.' She gets up and walks to the bathroom. 'I'll just brush my teeth, and I'll be out of your way.'

That was hard work, but just enough to tip him away from his darkest hour. Ryleigh had to be honest in a cruel-to-be-kind way as possible. He has every right to be angry; she gets it. Reading the article, too, only made her blood boil. But she can't emotionally level with Rory, as he'll never recover from it.

She gets her toothbrush and starts scrubbing away the built-up plaque overnight and from her breakfast this morning.

God, he looked gorgeous in her bed, even if he was drunk and disoriented. It was too close to comfort. The desire to lay there with him and sleep would side-track them both. It would make Rory not want to think, and Ryleigh wonders what to say.

But she'd done it. Congruence with his fears causes them to be on the same page once again.

She spits the remaining toothpaste out of her mouth and looks to see Rory in the bathroom mirror as he comes in.

He's in his boxers, tired but sexy enough to get away with it. Ryleigh tries to flee as quickly as possible to lessen her arousal.

'Sorry, I'll be out in a second.' Ryleigh tries to move, but Rory stops her. His head rests on the back of her neck as he hugs her.

'Not yet.' He whispers.

She softly touches the lines in his tattoos as she stares down at his arms wrapped over her tummy and feels his heat beat gently on her back.

'Thank you for being understanding.' Rory says.

'I'm always happy to help you. You've been doing the same for me.'

He kissed the side of her neck. This is getting hot for Ryleigh to handle, and she rips free from his embrace.

'I should let you get ready.' She turns to face him, but he still won't let her go, and she is trapped between him and the sink.

'Can I tell you what I'm thinking right now?' He spoke softly, touching her nose with his. Rory presses his body closer, and she can feel his hard-on budge.

She bites her lip, 'I have a feeling it involves the both of us...' Before Rory could open his mouth, Ryleigh managed to step away. '... I'll let you think about it in the shower.'

Finally, she managed to extricate herself, make her getaway, and close the bathroom door. She leans on it, just letting her excitement pass.