How to get him to fall in love | ✔

Chapter Twenty Five

My grades go downhill over the next couple of months, I don't do it intentionally but it just happens my brain is consumed by Elias

And even when I don't speak to him or see him, or keep away from him intending to catch up on work, it's basically the same like seeing him, because in the physical absence of him, my brain makes up for it, by creating enough to think about him

For some reason all I can think about is how to make him want me more because I am too far gone to forget about him. So I begin with the staying away tactic, and I hate it because I have to see him speak to every other girl and pretend to not be bothered about it when my friends ask me about it

Why must he speak to other girls? No one even seems remotely interesting to me anymore just because of him

I stopped texting him too, and answering his call, I don't know what I was trying to achieve, the plan was for him to miss me, until I saw him hanging with another girls in the library, and then talking to another in one of the classes we had together

I thought the heart grows fonder in absence, but all Elias seemed to be doing was fill the absence with other girls

It was also Finals, so it was easy to focus on doing other things, and I think that's also why he didn't try as hard to look for me

Stop making excuses for him

A few days later, I spotted him alone in the library and he spotted me too, I started walking in the opposite direction of him. He caught up to me

''Wait up Amber'' he calls behind me, I don't stop walking, neither do I slow down, but he still gets to me and stops me with his hand on my arm, he lets go when I look down at his arm

''Are you avoiding me?'' he asks

''Nope, just busy'' I say, not meeting his gaze, it's much harder to be cold when I'm looking at him

''You sure?''

So much different thoughts and feelings are running through my head right now

''Want to hang out later?'' He suggests, his mouth hinting at the teeniest smile

''Nope still busy'' I state, then begin to turn around, he stops me again with his hand

''Okay I'm sensing that you might be angry with me''

''Why would I be angry at you?'' I ask

He shrugs ''You sure you okay then? You look...pissed off''

''I'm sure if you ask enough times Fiona or Jasmine or whoever you want will agree to fuck you'' I say, unable to keep it in anymore

I need to get out of here right now before I fuck this up

''Hold up Amber, what's the issue here?''

''Nothing, I'm late for something'' I say, then begin walking

He stops me ''Okay, then I'll go with you''

I sigh, he knows I'm not late for anything he has my class schedule just like I have his

What if he is a nice guy, what if he is just that way with girls and I'm getting jealous over nothing, and I'm allowing my emotions to get the better hand of me, just because I like him too much, but still like Fran said when a boy likes a girl she'd know there'd be no uncertainty, and I don't know exactly how he feels, well he did say how he feels but I don't believe it

''Are you jealous?'' Elias asks playfully

''Oh fuck you'' I exclaim, I've about had it

He laughs, ''okay sorry, sorry definitely not jealousy, what is it then?''

I glare daggers at him before actually deciding to answer

''I don't know '' I sigh exasperated ''uncertainty''

''about what?''

''us, this, whatever this is, I don't want to waste my time Elias, but you clearly do'' I say

''you know you the only girl I want'' he says softly, taking my hand in his

I scoff; this just makes me more upset

Not too late to walk away, he reads the expression in my eyes, because he doesn't let go of my hand

''Talk to me'' he says earnestly

I look at him, and I cave in, I want to be honest with him, because I want him to have the opportunity to do better

''I know you said you wouldn't break my heart, but you seem like someone who could''

''I swear you have nothing to worry about'' he assures me ''which I have told you already''

''Yes, but this is all words'' I say gesturing around for a more profound effect

''What do you want? A fucking contract Amber?'' he asks rhetorically, chuckling bitterly

''Okay no need to cuss'' I say annoyed, knitting my eyebrows together

''Sorry, sorry, it's just sometimes you drive me insane'' he admits

''Are you seriously blaming me for you cussing at me'' I ask in utter disbelief

''No, godamn it, I'm trying to understand you, but you make it hard to understand what you want when you always beating around the bush''

''Because maybe I'm scared to tell you the truth'' I yell at him

This shuts him up

''Why?''

I look down to my shoes nervously

''Telling someone the truth is scary, because you don't know how they will respond to it, and if they don't respond the way you want or thought they would, you'd be more hurt because it's the truth, and the truth always hurts more than lies, because they're real''

He doesn't say anything for a brief moment, just takes both my hand in his, and pulls me closer to him

''Well relationships are scary, you take a chance and hope for the best'' he states

I let out a breath of defeat

''I don't want to date a thousand guys,'' I admit '' I just want to do it right the first time''

''Well then I'm a perfect candidate'' he says with his arms outstretched, he starts chuckling when I swat him with my hand on his arm

''Come here'' he says pulling me into his embrace and leading me somewhere more secluded, I think it's the librarians staff room, I'm too engulfed by him to notice or care

He plants a kiss on my lips, I open my mouth to him, his tongue finds away into my mouth, and I practically succumb to his kiss, forgetting about everything we were talking about

But I can't just drop or forget about what we were talking about this is important

I do the hardest thing I ever could, I break away from him

''Elias''

He groans ''Amber''

I laugh, ''I'm not done talking''

''Why won't you just let me kiss you instead of talking''

''I promise you can, just I need to tell you this''

He straightens himself up

''Okay, I'm all ears''

''Just please promise to tell me if you don't see this working out, because I don't want things to get too far if you're just going to hurt me in the end''

He lets out a breath

''Yes amber I promise you this, but that won't happen''

I smile, and step closer to him

''What do you say we skip the rest of the day and go to my place'' I ask him, knowing he still has two classes left

''Thought you'd never ask''